The Adventures of Hit-Girl was pretty Kick-Ass

Overall, I was pleased with Kick-Ass.  Surprisingly violent and gory, and expectedly nerd-awkward at times.  But I guess my expectations for this movie were a little higher than I had hoped for.  Or maybe the story wasn’t quite as what I had expected it to be.  When I left the theater, all I really had were feelings of satisfaction for the side characters, and more or less indifferent to disappointment with the titular Kick-Ass himself.

I’ll probably disclose more information about the flick than you may or may not want to hear, so if you haven’t seen the flick, read on at your own risk.

If the title of this post didn’t make it clear, the movie pretty much turns into the Adventures of Hit-Girl, as the story pretty much ends up focusing on her and Big Daddy.  But that’s fine with me, because the two of them are easily the most interesting and entertaining characters in the flick.

Hit-Girl, played by cute-as-a-button Chloe Moretz (who btw is out of Atlanta) steals the show easily.  Likeable in so many different ways, be it character development, the unusual visuals of a pre-teen demonstrating mastery at a variety of weaponry, the dialogue, re-enacting a FPS, or being a pedophile’s dream come true, parading around in a schoolgirl outfit with pigtails, she’s without question the shining star of the entire movie.  I haven’t looked, but I’m pretty sure that there are no less than ten creepy websites about way-too grown men infatuated with her, five or so websites of chicks who want to be here, and if MySpace were still around, probably about a billion little girls who are exclaiming their fandom for her.  But I can’t say I blame anyone, because if there was any character that truly did kick ass, it was her.

I’ve never been that big of a fan of Nicholas Cage, in fact I think he’s kind of a tool overall.  But if there was ever a character that was more suited for Nick Cage, it was Big Daddy.  Cage does not hide the fact that he’s a gigantic comic book geek, even going as far as to name his kid after Superman’s Kryptonian name, “Kal-El” Cage (or Coppola).  Being a big gear head as well, the role of Ghost Rider was easily something that he was all over as well.  But Big Daddy – I’ll go as far as to say that I kind of liked him in this role.  Sure, it’s kind of a Batman rip, but more entertainingly sadistic.  Combined with his interactions with daughter Hit-Girl, and we have here is easily the most captivating characters in the movie.

Take Hit-Girl and Big Daddy out of the flick, and Kick-Ass probably would have sucked.  The other characters seen in the commericals, Kick-Ass and Red Mist are both pretty lame otherwise, regardless of the stories behind them.  Both of them were typical nerd-core loser dork characters that are supposed to resonate with us other dorks with our esoteric humor, references and inside jokes that only we’re supposed to get.  I think I’m getting a little tired of seeing McLovin in all these nerdy flicks.

But overall, I was pleased with the movie.  I didn’t realize that it was an R-rated movie until I got to the theater, so that created a little bit of promise.  But all that meant was that there was a lot of F-bombs, and a lot of bloody violence – no tits, despite the fact that tease twice in the movie with a hot, cougar-y teacher with magnificent jugs, as well as the obligatory love interest that is one of those strange Miley Cyrus/Hilary Duff hybrid lookalikes that are cropping up all over Hollywood these days.  But tits does a movie make not, and when I was leaving the theater, I was pleased

I’m now expecting to see about 50 inappropriately old/fat/wrong/all of the above Hit-Girls at Dragon-con, and probably 10-15 equally crappy and out of shape Kick-Asses.  It is inevitable.

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