{"id":31883,"date":"2012-01-05T11:28:47","date_gmt":"2012-01-05T15:28:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/totfc.net\/?p=31883"},"modified":"2020-06-29T11:28:59","modified_gmt":"2020-06-29T15:28:59","slug":"things-i-would-tweet-if-i-did-twitter","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/?p=31883","title":{"rendered":"Things I would tweet if I did Twitter"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-family: Lora; font-size: 12pt;\">If people spoke in the manner in which they typed, then 70% people on the internet probably sound like retards.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Lora; font-size: 12pt;\">The mark of good text communication is the conveyance of voice.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Lora; font-size: 12pt;\">Taking the middle urinal out of three urinals is always a dick move.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Lora; font-size: 12pt;\">I wish more things were punishable by immediate death.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Lora; font-size: 12pt;\">It would be awesome if remote-controlled retractable spike strips, existed to put on my far-off, preferred parking space.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>If people spoke in the manner in which they typed, then 70% people on the internet probably sound like retards. The mark of good text communication is the conveyance of voice. Taking the middle urinal out of three urinals is always a dick move. I wish more things were punishable by immediate death. It would &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/totfc.net\/?p=31883\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Things I would tweet if I did Twitter<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[15,156],"class_list":["post-31883","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-brog","tag-og","tag-social-media"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31883","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=31883"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31883\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":31884,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31883\/revisions\/31884"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=31883"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=31883"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=31883"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}