{"id":32619,"date":"2012-04-29T21:58:46","date_gmt":"2012-04-30T01:58:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/totfc.net\/?p=32619"},"modified":"2020-06-30T21:58:56","modified_gmt":"2020-07-01T01:58:56","slug":"abby-wambach-looks-like-the-guy-from-wanted","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/?p=32619","title":{"rendered":"Abby Wambach looks like the guy from Wanted"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/span><\/p>\n

Everytime I see\u00a0this commercial<\/a>, I can\u2019t help but think this.<\/span><\/p>\n

I vaguely know the name Abby Wambach, because I look at enough sports websites on a regular basis for osmosis to eventually absorb, or maybe it was during the time when the whole world was fascinated with Hope Solo that some of her teammates names manage to float around or something, but I had no idea of what she actually looked like.\u00a0 So I really had no idea that the \u201cprotagonist\u201d of this Gatorade commercial was Abby Wambach until the descriptors in the YouTube video revealed such information.<\/span><\/p>\n

But watching this commercial, I\u2019m always thinking that Abby Wambach looks like the main character from\u00a0Wanted<\/em>.\u00a0 That crappy movie which also had Angelina Jolie and Morgan Freeman, where the concept of curving and hooking bullets came from, which I\u2019ll occasionally rage-complain\/reference while playing L4D, when I\u2019m picked off around a corner, miraculously.\u00a0 But I mean, come on \u2013 look at the picture; they totally look alike.\u00a0 The swimmingly-green eyes, the Penguin-like hook nose, and even the furrowing of the brow, in intense agitation.<\/span><\/p>\n

So now that the comparison is complete, it\u2019s deduced that the guy from Wanted apparently plays professional women\u2019s soccer when not making shitty movies.\u00a0 Ironically what he does off-screen is reminiscent of the Rodney Dangerfield flick,\u00a0Ladybugs<\/em><\/a>, which focused around a dude playing soccer on a girls\u2019 team.\u00a0 And much like the character he played in Wanted was a gigantic pussy, the guy from Wanted waits until his defender is fatigued and feebly weak before exploiting it for the win.\u00a0 Granted, I\u2019m not above accepting wins no matter how they come, but ideally, nothing is more gratifying than beating an opponent when they\u2019re at their best, not when they\u2019re on their last legs.<\/span><\/p>\n

But whatever \u2013 Wanted was a shitty movie anyway, and I stopped drinking Gatorade for the most part.\u00a0 Too much fucking sodium.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Everytime I see\u00a0this commercial, I can\u2019t help but think this. I vaguely know the name Abby Wambach, because I look at enough sports websites on a regular basis for osmosis to eventually absorb, or maybe it was during the time when the whole world was fascinated with Hope Solo that some of her teammates names … Continue reading Abby Wambach looks like the guy from Wanted<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[159,41,83,15,58],"class_list":["post-32619","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-brog","tag-advertising","tag-movies","tag-observations","tag-og","tag-sports"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/32619","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=32619"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/32619\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":32621,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/32619\/revisions\/32621"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=32619"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=32619"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=32619"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}