![\"\"](\"http:\/\/totfc.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/07\/notimejessie.jpg\")
<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
Minus the caffeine pill addiction, but it\u2019s how I feel way more often than naught.<\/span><\/p>\n I have a lot of things that I feel I need to do: edit down nearly 2,000 pictures from Europe and Korea.\u00a0 Write about experiences in Korea.\u00a0 Build a prop.\u00a0 Take care of household chores, like replacing the kitchen light and paring down the shrubs.\u00a0 Write some more, about random, inane things for a brog that\u2019s been down since fucking April, that nobody will see until I migrate my site.\u00a0 Clean my house, so that I can someday sell my house.\u00a0 I need a haircut.<\/span><\/p>\n So what do I do?\u00a0 Write about how I feel like I don\u2019t have enough time, or any time, instead.<\/span><\/p>\n In my defense, I am currently not in a place where I can do much of my self-imposed workload, although I could write about Korea but I was there for two weeks how can i parse it all down to a few words???<\/span><\/p>\n <\/p>\n But it\u2019s frustrating, this lack of time, and it gets to me sometimes.\u00a0 I often exist with this feeling of being stretched thin, between two or three concurrent lives; being a boyfriend, a homeowner, and a worker.\u00a0 The places in which each of these lives are all so far apart from one another, that the time it takes to get from one place to the other adds to the frustration, and leads to this disheartening downward spiral of feeling like there\u2019s just never enough time.<\/span><\/p>\n I pass by mirrors and stare at my reflection sometimes, at this person scrambling around his existence, trying to pare down a checklist that never seems to have an end.\u00a0 Even the littlest tasks make their way onto the checklist, and I\u2019m often prioritizing and re-prioritizing the things I need to do, tackling the tiny to clear way for the large, or things that hold more weight and needs to be done regardless of else is on the list.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n I need to do this thing on my computer.\u00a0 But I should brush my teeth first.\u00a0 But I should let dog out before that.\u00a0 And I should probably take the trash out to the curb so that this week doesn\u2019t get skipped and we end up with an overflowing trashcan next week.\u00a0 Before I know it, 15 minutes have passed, and that\u2019s a quarter hour.\u00a0 In 15 more minutes is a half hour, and then 30 minutes until the next hour doesn\u2019t seem like enough time to bother getting started on something, because I wanted to plan to be preparing for bed in an hour, a quarter hour ago.<\/span><\/p>\n Honestly, there\u2019s probably something wrong with me, or some sort of clinical name for the anxiety I feel about there being a lack of time.\u00a0\u00a0 Or maybe I have just been operating with way too full of a plate for the last month(s).\u00a0 Regardless, I feel like I\u2019m reaching my wit\u2019s end with this feeling, and I\u2019m often pining for a time in which I don\u2019t have to worry about anything.<\/span><\/p>\n Ironically, there was a time in my life where I felt that there should always be something to look forward to.\u00a0 Like when I had no trip, no milestone or a date in fall to look forward to, I\u2019d feel anxious and aimless.\u00a0 2016 has had many things on the horizon, and I\u2019ve always been approaching a date, conversely, and it\u2019s honestly starting to get overwhelming.\u00a0 Fortunately, there\u2019s really only one more thing planned for the year, and then there\u2019s a fairly blank calendar afterwards.<\/span><\/p>\n Once November rolls around, I legitimately do not want to plan anything else.\u00a0 For the rest of the year, preferably.\u00a0 I just want to catch up on things, let my finances exhale, let myself exhale, and just simply exist.\u00a0 I am so tired of feeling like that there\u2019s not enough time, and I want nothing more than to wake up one weekend morning, and do absolutely jack shit.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Minus the caffeine pill addiction, but it\u2019s how I feel way more often than naught. I have a lot of things that I feel I need to do: edit down nearly 2,000 pictures from Europe and Korea.\u00a0 Write about experiences in Korea.\u00a0 Build a prop.\u00a0 Take care of household chores, like replacing the kitchen light … Continue reading This is me lately<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[36,108,163,121,177,18,65,146,166],"class_list":["post-44171","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-brog","tag-angst","tag-cosplay","tag-crafting","tag-homeownership","tag-mythical","tag-photos","tag-travel","tag-triggered","tag-vacation"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/44171","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=44171"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/44171\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":44173,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/44171\/revisions\/44173"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=44171"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=44171"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=44171"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}