{"id":49170,"date":"2023-01-06T10:12:15","date_gmt":"2023-01-06T15:12:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/totfc.net\/?p=49170"},"modified":"2023-01-12T10:12:24","modified_gmt":"2023-01-12T15:12:24","slug":"too-bad-this-wasnt-a-waffle-house-market","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/?p=49170","title":{"rendered":"Too bad this wasn\u2019t a Waffle House market"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Mmm\u2026 sweet, savory butter<\/a>: \u201cRiver of butter\u201d flows through Wisconsin town after fire rips through dairy plant<\/span><\/p>\n

Although this wasn\u2019t in Georgia, or any of its adjacent interstates, or even on a road at all, I still felt compelled by this news story, because I don\u2019t know why, I\u2019m always so fascinated when large quantities of food are spilled\/strewn\/exploded all over the place.\u00a0 There\u2019s just something so carnal, so chaotic and fantastical about the idea of food being wasted in such a horrifically tragic manner, especially considering the state of the planet and how there are so many more mouths to feed than food being produced.\u00a0 It’s like vicariously being involved in a food fight, but without having to feel the guilt of wasting food myself or being responsible for any of the actions of it.<\/span><\/p>\n

Either way, it\u2019s the descriptions and imagery of this story that were fascinating and prompted a post in the first place.\u00a0 I can only imagine being a resident of this small Wisconsin town, walking or driving down the street, but then there\u2019s this giant stream of yellowish-white flowing down towards me, and not having any clue in the world what it is.\u00a0 And when it\u2019s inevitable to step or drive in it and realizing that it\u2019s slippery as hell, knowing its butter, and being mortified at the thought of just how much butter had to have been incinerated to have ended up with such a tragic flow.<\/span><\/p>\n

My first thought was that it must have smelled amazing, with all the butter in the dairy plant getting melted, and that there were probably dogs and fat humans going apeshit over the delicious savory scene that had to have been all over the air, but EPA and hazmat people kind of ruin the fun by stating that such events typically conclude with the stinkiness of dairy going rancid in the wild.<\/span><\/p>\n

The visuals of the whole situation are what was really the most intriguing though.\u00a0 A canal getting coated in melted butter is pretty incredible to see.\u00a0 Sure, it\u2019s a colossal mess, but I\u2019d have to guess that they really just needed the stuff to settle and harden on top, and it should be somewhat manageable to remove it afterward, and in fact probably help clean the water somewhat by all the crap the butter can capture on the surface that will be disposed of with it once it is cleaned.<\/span><\/p>\n

But going back to the introductory joke, had this been in a Waffle House market and not way the fuck up north in Wisconsin, Waffle House could have totally come to the rescue and sent 2-3 griddle masters to the streets and cooked maybe 10-12 All-Star Breakfasts<\/a> with the ton of melted butter, so that it wouldn\u2019t have to go to waste.\u00a0 It\u2019s not like regular Waffle House customers wouldn\u2019t be used to dirt, debris and cigarette butts mixed in with their food in the first place.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Mmm\u2026 sweet, savory butter: \u201cRiver of butter\u201d flows through Wisconsin town after fire rips through dairy plant Although this wasn\u2019t in Georgia, or any of its adjacent interstates, or even on a road at all, I still felt compelled by this news story, because I don\u2019t know why, I\u2019m always so fascinated when large quantities … Continue reading Too bad this wasn\u2019t a Waffle House market<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[100,56,83,52,170],"class_list":["post-49170","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-brog","tag-comparison","tag-food","tag-observations","tag-owned","tag-truck-spill"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/49170","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=49170"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/49170\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":49172,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/49170\/revisions\/49172"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=49170"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=49170"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=49170"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}