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NYP<\/a>: dumbasses of today theorize the redundancy of airport policies, makes \u201cchallenge\u201d of trying to traverse an airport prior to a flight in as short as time as possible<\/span><\/p>\n Honestly, I\u2019ve long since thrown in the towel at trying to rationalize the dumb shit that the people of today do.\u00a0 Go ahead and call it me getting old, but I\u2019m seldom ever surprised at the things that become trends, so much as I\u2019m always just like \u201cehh, that\u2019s a thing now?\u00a0 Fucking ok<\/em>\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n So not only am I not surprised that the trend labeled airport theory<\/em> is a thing now, I\u2019m more surprised that it\u2019s taken this long for it to have been given a name, because people have been testing airport theory for as long as I\u2019ve been flying, especially in the post-9\/11 days where the TSA came to existence and the obnoxious policies that are mostly in place today came to fruition.<\/span><\/p>\n People have been testing the boundaries and limits of what they can get away with, with airport policies since 2001, but the only difference really is the existence of TikTok, and the gradually sheep-herder mentalities of the people today who see something and immediately want to mimic it en masse to where it rapidly picks up steam and becomes yet another dumbass trend that\u2019s quick to be labeled a Gen-Z thing, which I don\u2019t always agree with, because I\u2019ve seen people of all ages testing airport theory over the last two decades-plus.<\/span><\/p>\n My only real thought is that I really wish airport theory were a thing back 10-15 years ago, when I had a Delta flight pass and could basically hop on any flight to anywhere in the continental United States, as a standby, which I obviously utilized to tremendous effect, contributing towards me crushing a large portion of my 30 MLB baseball park journey.<\/span><\/p>\n I always played it smart, monitored conditions and kept abreast of as many variables as I could to optimize my chances at getting on all the flights I wanted to, but I wasn\u2019t without my share of failures too.\u00a0 I\u2019ve been stuck in places like Seattle, Minneapolis, Portland and failed to get out of Reagan-National countless times, and more times than I can count, I was unable to get out of Atlanta for the start of a trip, regardless of how much things seemed possible beforehand.<\/span><\/p>\n If travel theory were a thing 10-15 years ago, my success rate at getting on planes would have likely skyrocketed, because when airlines actually adhere to policy, the dumbasses who are testing airport theory and trying to get from airport entrance to the jetbridge giving themselves 15 minutes would have forfeited their seats eons ago in comparison, and for every idiot that insisted on testing airport theory there were, would be one more standby passenger cleared to board the aircraft.<\/span><\/p>\n In fact, some of my worst stories involving standby travel probably involve dorks who were testing airport theory, inadvertently, before it was even coined as being airport theory.\u00a0 Like me getting cleared to board an aircraft but then being bumped at the eleventh hour and 59th<\/sup> minute because some fuckwit managed to bitch and complain and eke their way to the gate, and reclaim their forfeited seat because the squeaky wheel always gets the grease.<\/span><\/p>\n But yeah, if airport theory were a thing 10-15 years ago when I was jetsetting and traveling nearly twice a month, I would\u2019ve not only had a way easier time in traveling, I probably would have traveled more and explored the country if I knew it would be so easy to travel.<\/span><\/p>\n The funny thing is, and I don\u2019t care enough about it to look it up, but I\u2019m really curious to see how much of all these airport theory videos are occurring in Atlanta.\u00a0 If there\u2019s not a lot of evidence of airport theory being tested at ATL, then I can comfortably say that if there was, the trend would undoubtedly come to a screeching halt.\u00a0 Fewer airports are staffed with as many people who relish and take sadistic, arrogant satisfaction at ruining the days of travelers than Atlanta Hartsfield Latoya Jackson Intergalactic Spaceport and Nail Emporium.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n The irony is that they don\u2019t do it by being incompetent, they do so by being as procedurally bullet proof as possible, adhering to every single bulleted rule there could be in airport, airline, TSA policy, with the express purpose of fucking every single person who tries to skirt protocol, test airport theory and try and get one up on system.<\/span><\/p>\n I\u2019d love to see one of these TikTok dorks make a video where they\u2019re like \u201cuhh hey what\u2019s up guys, I\u2019m at ATL, I\u2019ve got 15 minutes to board my Delta flight at T7, and I just got to security\u201d and then it cuts to them having moved up maybe 7-8 people and then they\u2019re like \u201cwelp, looks like I missed my flight\u201d or they get to their gate, the doors are closed, and the gate agent is smugly finishing their outbound report, as they calmly tell the camera \u201csir\/ma\u2019am, procedure dictates that you be present at the gate at X time OR we will forfeit your seat\u201d and then airport theory is basically defeated.<\/span><\/p>\n Either way, I wish this shit existed 10-15 years ago.\u00a0 I would\u2019ve thrived as a traveler, getting on more flights at a way higher clip, and seen more of the country before it completely went to shit.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" NYP: dumbasses of today theorize the redundancy of airport policies, makes \u201cchallenge\u201d of trying to traverse an airport prior to a flight in as short as time as possible Honestly, I\u2019ve long since thrown in the towel at trying to rationalize the dumb shit that the people of today do.\u00a0 Go ahead and call it … Continue reading I wish airport theory were around 10-15 years ago<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[117,45,143,52,156,65,49],"class_list":["post-50460","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-brog","tag-airports","tag-fail","tag-ohatlanta","tag-owned","tag-social-media","tag-travel","tag-wtf"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/50460","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=50460"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/50460\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":50462,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/50460\/revisions\/50462"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=50460"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=50460"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/totfc.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=50460"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}