WTF is AEW doing #208

The above picture are four of the marquee matches that are so far on deck for the 2023 edition of AEW x NJPW Forbidden Door.  Two of these matches, on paper, should absolutely blow the roof off of the venue; such could have been said about several of matches on the card last year, but in typical AEW overbooking, they underperformed as far as I was concerned.  Regardless, that means two of these matches, in comparison will not be blowing the roofs off of any venue.

If you guessed that those two duds were the two matches in which the AEW world title and the IWGP world title were on the line, you’d be spot on.  There is no reality in existence where either company would dare having their world championship going over to another promotion, no matter how collaborative and positive-working relationship exists between AEW and New Japan.

That being said, aside from the fact that there is little logic or even any buildup between the competitors in these matches, there’s little reason to believe that either of these matches will be particularly any good, much less be of any threat of being the show-stealing match of the night for such a loaded card.

MJF is so protected, there’s little reason to believe he’d lose at all this year, much less to Hiroshi Tanahashi, whom I’m coming to the personal conclusion that he’s basically the token jobber to the stars of NJPW, because sure I don’t watch NJPW with any regularity, but I’ve actually never seen him win a match in like, 4-5 years.  Him losing to MJF is about as a safe bet as expecting cash to come out of an ATM when you put in your PIN correctly.

And then we have Jungle Boy versus SANADA for the IWGP world championship, and when I saw this one, I’m furrowing my brow and thinking, there’s nobody else on the entire AEW roster that would’ve been more compelling to put in a match against the IWGP world champion??

In all fairness, Jungle Boy is a strong worker, but he’s 175 lbs, scrawny as a shoot of bamboo and can’t even sell the suspension of belief that he can hang in the ring with a stud like SANADA.  Off the top of my head, I could think of several other AEW guys I’d rather see have a match with SANADA, but none of them are one of their handpicked pillars or are really known to be tight with the Elite circlejerk to warrant getting the nod.

I mean, these turds might be by design, seeing as how lots of promoters tend to operate under the belief that a crowd has a finite amount of energy to give to a show, and it really is safe to assume that Bryan Danielson vs. Kazuchika Okada and Kenny Omega vs. Will Ospreay are going to be competing with each other to see which will be the first-ever Ten-Meltzer Star match in history as if it means anything in the long run, but on that same vein why bother having World title matches at all, if it means forcing the booking to include obvious and unexciting matchups?

Initially, I wanted to say that the show should have no titles be on the line, but thanks to the collaborative booking prior to the show, it’s fairly obvious that Ospreay is going to go over Omega and regain the IWGP US title, because Omega had gone over to Japan to take it from him months ago.  And if you’re going to defend one, might as well put others on the line, but most definitely the World titles shouldn’t be on the line, because they’re definitely not changing hands.

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How did the Ford Bronco become such the white peoples’ car?

Over the last few days, I had a pretty white span of existence.  Sure, this doesn’t help detract from the narrative that I’m a Americanized banana of a twinkie kind of Asian person, but as the circumstances have it, my family and I spent a few days on the road, stopping in Savannah and for the first time in my life, visiting Hilton Head Island, which is about one of the whitest places in the country.

Seriously, thinking back to the time spent in HHI, I genuinely can’t recall seeing more than one other person of color, and that person was also Asian which is to say that I don’t remember seeing a single black person while out there.

We stayed at a bougie resort for a few days, and lounged in the pool, went to the beach and even went to the Salty Dog Café, which I’m only aware of its existence because of an old neighbor of mine growing up always seemed to have a lot of Salty Dog Café apparel.  For the record, the dining experience was pleasant on the water of a relaxed beach community, but the food and the prices were not quite as satisfactory and I could be content with the rest of my life if I never experienced them again.

But overall, it was a pleasant trip spent with my family and I got to watch my children have a lot of fun in the pool, in our suite, on the beach and chowing down on all sorts of junk food we typically don’t always make available to them at home, and in spite of the shade I spout about HHI being a really white place, it’s also a really nice place, and I’d definitely be open to going there again in the future, and hopefully for longer.

However, to get to the point of this post, as the subject goes, I’m very curious to how the new Ford Bronco seems to have become the official car of white people across the country now.  When Ford announced that they were reviving the name and creating a new vehicle to resurrect the car, I couldn’t possibly have been more indifferent.  In fact, I was more perplexed and wincing over such news, because to me, the Ford Bronco has forever been tainted and etched with death and scandal since OJ Simpson led the LAPD on the most televised chase in history after he “didn’t” murder his wife.

Apparently such reaction and recollection didn’t resonate with the white people of America, because since they started rolling off the line, Ford Broncos have been snapped up and are being driven like crazy by white people all over the place.  Seriously, I haven’t seen a single Bronco driver on the road that isn’t white, and they’re often times being driven with the arrogant mentality of “I have one and you don’t,” because of the sheer demand for these murderer cars.

And I can’t help but be curious to why the Ford Bronco has caught on with white people with such enthusiasm, when I can’t shake the association of the car’s reputation of being what a tried-but-not-found-guilty murderer drove notoriously.  And then be further curious to what kind of message it sends that not only is the Ford Bronco more popular than it’s ever been in history, it’s apparently solely within the white community itself.

All shade aside, it really is fascinating that it’s so rabidly popular.  Aside from the whole, being OJ Simpson’s car, the Bronco is still a Ford product, and I will probably never not think of all Ford products being cheap, plastic turds with questionable build quality and reliability.  Even when I was on the market for a new car a while back, and told myself to wipe the slate clean with all makes and models, Ford was the first maker to get slapped back onto the blacklist after test-driving the option I had earmarked as a potential car, because it felt cheap, performed like shit, and was blown out of the water by every other option.

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Never thought I’d ever see NBA Champion Denver Nuggets

Originally, when I thought about writing about the Denver Nuggets, it was contingent that they actually won the NBA Championship before anything would be written about them.  I was going to write about being a millennial and seeing the strange sensation of seeing certain teams in major sports break through the wall of success and win a championship. 

But the more I did some cursory research on the history books, at least as far as being a millennial goes, MLB and the NFL doesn’t have nearly the parity as the NBA has had throughout, at least my lifetime.  Which is really strange to say about the NBA having parity, considering the seeming dynasties that have run rampant throughout my own lifetime, with the Bulls, Lakers, Spurs and Warriors all winning a ton of championships, but at the same time, the NBA has had more teams squirt through the cracks of history and win a championship, and break streaks of franchises to never be champions before.

Growing up, the NBA really was my first love as far as sports fandom went.  I was a big Knicks fan, but also a supporter of the Washington Bullets, and whenever the Knicks were bounced by the Chicago Bulls, I’d typically prefer to see them win over whoever emerged from the West.

That being said, during my own upbringing as an NBA fan, there were always certain teams that were always the doormats and/or the laughing stocks of the NBA.  The teams we never, ever wanted to play in a video game, the teams we always went ballistic whenever our favorite teams ever lost to them, if it ever happened, and the teams that were always forgotten about whenever talking about the league in general.

During this time, some of those teams were the Warriors, the Bucks, the Mavs, Cavs and of course, the Denver Nuggets.  Sure, at various points, some of those teams had some fairly successful seasons as far as win percentages go, but they were still never serious threats to win championships, usually being fodder for the Bulls, Lakers, Pistons and the Rockets.

I remember how weird it seemed when the Spurs broke through the glass ceiling and won their first championship.  I was resentful because I was a Knicks fan, and I chalked up the Spurs’ win to being a lockout shortened year, and how it shouldn’t really count.  But then they’d go on to win several more championships over the next decade, and truly cementing themselves as one of the all-time great teams.

The same could be said of when the Miami Heat broke into the upper echelon, even before LeBron James took his talents to South Beach and won two more championships, and the same was said when the Golden State Warriors not only reached the top of the mountain, they built a house on top of it, winning four championships and basically living in the NBA Finals for the better part of a decade.

However, aside from the teams that grew into dynasties, regardless of my casual, and only during the playoffs interest in the NBA, I’m always fascinated by the teams that sneak out a championship, seemingly, to me, out of nowhere.  Especially when they’re one of the teams that I grew up thinking would never, ever, in a million years, see a championship ascension, regardless that on a long enough timeline, everyone eventually has to win one of these days.

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Anthony Bass DFA’d LOL

Often times in the world of sport, there are personalities that are less than savory, but no matter how much of an asshole these guys can be, they always have a job because they’re exceptionally good at playing children’s games in front of large crowds without crumbling to the pressure of performing.

Roger Clemens had an affair with a minor.  Kobe Bryant allegedly raped a woman.  Ray Lewis stabbed a guy to death.  And all went on to have hall of fame careers, with nary a punishment in sight.  Far too often, professional athletes can be shitheads but still have jobs because of the fact that they’re good at sports.

Anthony Bass is no stranger to the brog, in fact showing up just a few weeks ago when I had an opinion on his last escapade with United Airlines, involving his wife and kids on a flight, and her being asked to clean up after her kids in spite of being pregnant.  But no matter how divisive and viral their story went, when the day was over, Anthony Bass was continuing to pitch for the Toronto Blue Jays and making a lot of money.

I apparently missed it because I hardly pay much attention to anything beyond my kids these days, but apparently Bass is not a fan of the team he plays for’s support of the LGBTQ+ community and the team’s participation in hosting a Pride Night.  No surprise there, the players themselves are not beholden to the beliefs and supports (genuine or corporately forced) of the organizations they play for.  And a large portion of professional athletes are often times a bunch of rednecks whom shouldn’t be any surprise to not be a fan of woke culture and anything remotely leaning left.

But most players are typically smart enough to keep their opinions to themselves, because anyone with a brain knows that the activities and matters that pertain to the people in the stands has no bearing of what happens on the field.  Just because it’s a Pride Night at the Rogers Centre or Dodger Stadium or Wrigley Field doesn’t mean that the gays are allowed to get on the field and try to tackle base runners as they’re rounding third, but that doesn’t stop less-intelligent players from mouthing off and jeopardizing their livelihoods in the process.

So it’s no surprise that a guy like Anthony Bass isn’t a fan of the gays, in spite of the extremely likely jock behavior he’s probably done in a locker room that would easily constitute gay shit, and considering his bright idea to spout off on social media about his wife’s United Airlines escapades, he didn’t miss the opportunity to be quoted for speaking against the team’s intention of hosting a Pride Night.

At first, he was kind of expected to apologize and retract, and the team decided to try and have him be the catcher of the ceremonial first pitch, which undoubtedly would have been thrown by someone from the LGBTQ+ community, to which Bass flat out refused to participate in.  I imagine a bozo like him refused not because of the defiance of being told what to do, but probably because he didn’t want to be the literal and metaphorical catcher with a gay person.

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Let’s see if Philadelphia gets the same shit Atlanta did

TL;DR: a portion of I-95 in Philadelphia collapses from a tanker fire

Back in 2017, a portion of I-85 in Atlanta collapsed when a homeless guy set a couch on fire, the fire spread and ignited a bunch of flammable shit underneath a bridge, and then the bridge collapsed.  I-85 had a gaping interruption that caused a tremendous amount of logistical issues for everyone who needed the major vein, and was only fixed as quickly as it was because of more or less, a reward bounty being put on the completion of time of the repair. 

It was still months slower than the Japanese repairing a sinkhole the size of a lake, but in the time in which it occurred, Atlanta became the butt of bad jokes, memes and all sorts of opportunity for people to dunk on us, because for some reason, Atlanta is an easy punching bag for all the unfunny comedians on the internet.

Welp, the shoe is on the other foot now, and what we have here is an extremely similar situation, happened in another major city.  I-95 is obviously one of the most essential veins not just in Philadelphia, but across the entire eastern seaboard, so the impact of it being collapsed in Philly is about similar if not worse than Atlanta’s highway collapse.

I can’t say that I care enough to check, but I would be curious to see if Philly gets the same types of criticism, ridicule and memes poking fun at their situation as Atlanta did, or if, by virtue of not being Atlanta, Philly gets off easier than things were here.

Frankly, all government doesn’t do shit jokes aside, at this point, I’m curious how this could have even happened after the debacle in Atlanta.  I don’t work in a DOT or anything, but I would’ve thought that routine checking of structural integrity and examination of bridge construction probably should’ve leveled up at least a hair after Atlanta.  Sure, highways are meant to be resilient structures meant to support millions of cars and pounds of weight crossing over them endlessly, but come on now, fire shouldn’t be disintegrating bridges.

Someone somewhere in the PA DOT wasn’t doing their job, and for their troubles, they alleviate Atlanta from their own embarrassing bridge collapse, and I hope they pay the internet price of criticism and ridicule the same way we did here.

Fare thee well, NXT Women’s Tag Team Championship

We hardly knew thee.

It’s evident that a change of eras is occurring in the WWE currently, because when blets start changing across the board, it’s a sure sign that we’re about to embark on a new era, that won’t officially be named, because they tend to happen organically based on the trend of whatever is going on.

At this point, there’s been a new big gold blet introduced, Roman Reigns’ two world championship blets have been merged into a singular gold variant of the same blet and called Undisputed, and just this past week on Smackdown, Asuka was awarded a brand new women’s championship, which was basically the women’s variant of Roman Reigns’ gold variant, but with a white strap, because as the E has established over the last era, black strap = men, white strap = women.

Obviously, I’m stoked that Asuka is the first one to hold the new women’s gold logo blet because I’m a fan of hers, and it seems inevitable that Rhea Ripley will be getting a new championship blet to replace the blue Smackdown variant, which if I had to guess will probably be the same thing as Seth Rollins’ new big gold blet, but with a white strap.

The United States and Intercontinental blets were re-designed in the middle of the last era, so they will probably stand pat for a little while longer, and I suspect that the Unified tag team blets that are currently held by Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens will probably be consolidated sometime soon.  But apparently the women’s tag team blets are on the docket next, because we’re getting this seemingly random and out of nowhere program pitting the WWE Women’s Tag champions against the NXT Women’s Tag champions who were drafted to the main roster without any resolution to what was going to happen with their NXT titles.

It’s not often where an outcome seems so overwhelmingly foregone, but I think it’s safe to say that it’s about the layup of the century that Ronda Rousey and Shayna Baszler are going to defeat Alba Fyre and Isla Dawn, and merge the NXT Women’s tag blets into their own, with a new design possibly to come soon, or maybe not, if scuttlebutt is accurate and Vince McMahon has more influence than is believed because he clearly doesn’t give a flying fuck about women’s wrestling and probably won’t bother redesigning their blets.

And a part of me hopes that doesn’t happen, because it’d be nice for the blets that I have replicas of for my daughters actually lasts a substantial amount of time, but that’s beside the point.

The point is, the NXT Women’s Tag Team championship barely lasted two years, so it really is genuine to say, we hardly knew thee.  Created because of a potential feud that went nowhere involving main roster talent versus NXT talent, the reality is that it was probably more for the WWEShop to have another replica to peddle, which reminds me that if they ever reduce the cost of these I might have to pick up a pair for my daughters, but what could’ve been a great championship to the brand, was kind of bungled around over the last two years, primarily due to the re-branding, management changes, personnel changes, injuries and just a lack of good booking.

In a way, I understand why the WWE is pulling the plug on the NXT Women’s Tag Team championship, but as someone who has always kept a close eye on the women’s division and the growth of women’s wrestling throughout the years, it doesn’t come without a feeling of good riddance from the company, which makes me a little melancholy about it.

All the same, going back a step, I wish there could’ve been a little bit more buildup for the match between the two teams, to at least give the ol’ college try to sell Alba Fyre and Isla Dawn as threats to Rousey and Baszler.  Most fans are aware of Kay Lee Ray, before becoming Alba Fyre, and how she’s a phenomenal worker in her own right, way stronger than anyone else in this match and if I could get more granular, it also goes without saying that Isla Dawn is the one who’s going to eat the L in this match, with the only question being whom she taps out to between Rousey or Baszler. Continue reading “Fare thee well, NXT Women’s Tag Team Championship”

Identity crisis

Just the other night mythical wife said that our household should be What We Do in the Shadows characters for Halloween.  And without any hesitation, she said that I should be Guillermo.

To the credit of that opinion, my face immediately made the same face Guillermo does whenever he looks at the camera after the vampires do something stupid.  But I wasn’t at all impressed at the knee-jerk association.

The lack of excitement of that was obviously noticed, and the back pedaling and explaining begins; he’s a badass vampire slayer, he’s the glue that holds the house together, he’s the guy that’s perpetually on the edge and verge of snapping being sick of everyone else’s shit, and I’m just thinking about the guy that’s fat, gets walked on by everyone around him, and is basically there for comedic relief but usually at his own expense.

Now I love the show, and it’s a fair comp, but the fact of the matter is that Guillermo is kind of the show loser, and it depressed me to be so immediately comped up to him.  He is an awesome character with a lot more depth than all the others, but when you take a step back and look at Guillermo as a whole, he’s a guy with no discernable identity, and spends the vast majority of his existence cleaning up after others and not at all doing anything for himself, much less forming an identity.  He’s the joke, he’s the doormat, he’s the comic relief.

But like I said, it’s not a completely unfair comparison.  I am the guy that keeps my house together; I’m the guy that maintains or manages the landscaping, the (attempted) cleanliness, tries to keep the house in working order and somewhat organized, with little or no help.  I take the vast majority of parenting duties, and any minute where I’m not working my job, I’m spending time with my kids while they’re awake, and it’s not until they are in bed that I have any semblance of downtime, that is when I’m not back to managing the home.

And I am, perpetually on the verge of losing my shit, because my life is not at all easy, I’m overworked, under-helped, taken for granted, and I’ve just been reminded of my general lack of identity in the world other than a dad or a housekeeper.  Both titles are undoubtedly important and I take them seriously, but when I try to picture anyone else thinking about me, I struggle to wonder what in the world words formulate in their minds when they think about me, other than those two things.

Because I don’t know what words formulate in my own mind when it comes to trying to describe myself.  I think I used to be a sports guy, specifically a baseball guy, when I was super into baseball and talking about sports all the time.  I used to be a League guy when I spent so much of my life buried in the League of Legends community.  I used to be the wrestling guy, which might be the closest thing I’m still identifiable to these days, and I most definitely was the belt guy, but the thing is that I’ve gotten pretty much every blet I want and until I have an office again, there’s not much point in getting any others.  Ironically, the one thing that I have staunchly refused to ever give up, being my desire to write, is probably the one thing so few people actually know I do, because I have zero readers and I’m neurotic and don’t want to advertise that I do it, so being a writing guy or a brogger isn’t exactly something anyone would know me for.

But the thing is, other than the latter I don’t think I’m really any of these things anymore.  As my kids came into existence, and my personal time diminished into negligible amounts, all my hobbies and interests fell to the wayside as any time I had to myself was either staring at a wall or trying to motivate myself to write something, usually about how burned out and over my life in general I was feeling at the time, kind of like I’m doing right now.

And so, I don’t really have an identity anymore, I don’t think.  As often as I think I would benefit from a day or two completely by myself to actually rest and recharge, I really don’t know what I’d even do.  I’m so money conscious that I wouldn’t want to spend the money to go hide out at a hotel or something, and I’d feel guilty eating out and spending money that I know I shouldn’t be spending, but I also can’t really expect to get any recharge time when I’m around my kids, because I want to spend time with them, so I’m left in this spiraling swirl of indecisiveness and end up doing nothing but watching television and treading the waters of depression.

Really, I just need this funky emotional wave to pass so I can go about my life without the baggage.  Hopefully I won’t be reminded of how much of a Guillermo I am again any time soon.