Month: August 2024

I can’t wait for Xavier Woods’ heel turn

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Lots of long-time wrestling fans are smarter than people like to give them credit for.  The wrestling industry is at its best when they treat the fans with a modicum of respect for their intelligence and don’t go out of their way to dumb things down that questions it instead.

At this point, I can confidently believe that Xavier Woods’ heel turn isn’t so much just being hinted or teased, it’s definitely something that’s going to happen with the only question really being is just, when?

As much as I was a fan of the group, let’s not deny the fact that The New Day has been dead for the better part of the last few years.  One member of the squad has always been injured at various points throughout this span, and as much yeoman’s work the other two have done in their absence, the fact of the matter is that The New Day has always been a three-man group, and whenever it’s unable to be such, it means that The New Day isn’t really there.

With the unfortunate neck injury that has basically retired Big E at this point was really the nail in the coffin for the group, and it’s like Xavier Woods and Kofi Kingston have just been chugging along under The New Day banner, mostly out of a general lack of ideas of what to do with them in the meantime.  They’re both trustworthy hands, their brand is still popular and easy to stay over, but the reality remains that them and the group have just been a dead idea walking.

And then they just plucked Odyssey Jones out of NXT and went boom, you’re The New Day member #3, and I’m just like, nah dog, I’m fuckin out.  No disrespect to Odyssey, but it’s kind of low-hanging fruit and insulting that they just take a big black wrestler and throw him into The New Day with the express purpose of replacing Big E’s spot.

However, the best thing to emerge from this is that it appears that The New Day are back in the general plans of Creative™, and the wheels are in motion for the ultimate dissolution of the group together, culminating with what appears to be a heel turn for Xavier Woods, who has been the one member of the group to have been overlooked and not given a genuine chance at singles success for over a decade now.

They’ve teased Woods’ seeming lack of satisfaction of the inclusion of Odyssey Jones, there’s been remarks on live television about how Woods is the only member of the original squad to never have won a singles championship, and Woods himself has been doing an excellent job of facial expressions, body language and subtle, non-verbal performing that’s adding to the fuel that something is about to catch fire.

The only problem is that when the match is lit, and heel-Woods is initiated, I have this sneaking suspicion that the result isn’t necessarily going to be what the WWE is going to hope is going to happen, and the fans are going to pop like motherfuckers when it happens.

Kind of like when Becky finally snapped and decked Charlotte Flair during the pre-The Man days, the crowd went bonkers in support of Becky’s heel turn, because Becky Lynch was a performer that the fans had gotten to know, earned their respect, and drew empathy from the notion that they’d been held down and been a bridesmaid far too many times.

I feel like Xavier Woods is in a similar boat, and regardless of how he’s portrayed on television, he’s been building his personal brand for the better part of the last 10+ years on the internet, utilizing Up Up Down Down for people to get glimpses of Austin Creed, and there’s probably a notable amount of overlap between fans of Austin Creed and fans of Xavier Woods, and I predict that when Xavier Woods finally, goes heel and beats the fuck out of Odyssey Jones with a chair, and then plasters Kofi Kingston with a shot to effectively close the book on The New Day, people are going to pop, because the spotlight will suddenly be on Austin Creed, a guy that’s never really had the opportunity to have it, and they will all be excited to see how he handles being given the ball.

Just the thought of singles feuds for Xavier Woods, with inevitably Kofi, Sami Zayn and Jey Uso definitely seem like the types of programs that would get me to actually put effort into keep up to date with the product, but the question really is when they’re going to happen.  All the same, I can’t wait for it when it does, and let’s hope Creative pulls the trigger at the appropriate time, and doesn’t wait too long like they used to do so often throughout the early 2000’s.

Ted Lasso S4 announcement? Not sure how to feel

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Source: Ted Lasso season 4 appears to be imminent as options on several key actors appear to be picked up

I’m not sure how to feel about the escalating possibility that there might be more Ted Lasso.  In one hand, the show was the best show that I’d seen in a very long time, and I hold it up in similar regards to Parks & Rec as an all-time personal favorite.  I remember watching the first episode and thinking not long into it that I just knew I was going to love the series, and in the blink of an eye, I was wrapping up the third and final season, feeling sad that such a quality series was coming to an end, but also feeling happy at the general positivity of the series as a whole, and the neat and clean way they seemed to wrap everything up in the end.

To me, season 3 ended with the show seemingly knowing and at complete peace with itself at the conclusion of the series.  Sure, there were some open-ended doors opened for all of the characters, but that’s also a metaphor of life in that just because a singular arc ends doesn’t mean it’s the end of life itself.  But nothing to indicate that there would really be any possibility of there being any future seasons of the show once it all wrapped up.

Obviously, money is the ultimate equalizer and reason for any closed books to be opened back up and retconned in the name of producing moar, so in that regard, I’m also a little sad and apprehensive to hear about the possibility of more Ted Lasso because at this point, I can’t help but wonder if it can possibly be as good as the original three seasons were.

I’m trying not to give anything away, but the way the series wrapped up in S3 kind of makes it hard for the original series to continue on.  Perhaps all of this activity regarding performer options being picked up is going to culminate in a spinoff series of some sort which I’d find more palatable than trying to re-started Ted Lasso itself, but the way the internet is abuzz, they’re almost certain that it’s going to be a S4 of Ted Lasso instead.

And like I said, I’m not sure whether to be happy and excited for it, because I loved the show so much, but in the other hand I’m skeptical and don’t think there’s any way they can recapture the magic once again, especially when they will have to undo a lot of the finale to S3 in the process.

Either way, I guess that’s really the all I have to opine about the topic; I had marked this as something that I wanted to brog about, but it turns out that there’s not really that much for me to say without repeating myself three times over, but whatever show comes out of all of this, whether it’s Ted Lasso S4 or something Ted Lasso-adjacent, I’m going to be watching it anyway, because as a fan of the OG, it really goes without saying that I’ll give anything related to the show a chance to hopefully bring me back to television viewing enjoyment bliss.

DC’s Absolute Universe logos absolutely suck

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

I don’t dislike DC Comics, but I’m definitely one of those fans that feels like no matter what they do, no matter what they try, it always seems like it falls flat, and when they’re inevitably compared to Marvel, they’re always this extraordinary distant second place.  I love Batman, and I have no qualms with really any other DC property, but in my opinion, I just feel like DC in particular has fallen a little too victim to the changing of the times and ideals of the world, and have been way too quick to pull the plug on long-term storytelling, and retconned things so rapidly and so frequently that it’s hard to even tell what’s canon versus what’s just some blow-off one-off.

It’s like the comic industry is truly no different than the rest of the working world in that nobody stays put long enough to see through any chances at some good long-term storytelling or even just a year’s worth of comics these days, and the industry as a whole is full of convoluted, clunky crap that I have little interest in reading on the monthly, and prefer to read about it later on Wikipedia synopses, so that I can then go, what the fuck?

Anyway, in yet another reconning of the universe, DC Comics is apparently going in the route called the Absolute universe, which I’m guessing is a lot like when Marvel launched the Ultimate universe, but the fact of the matter is that it’s still a hard reset of all the flagship properties, with hopes of boosting sales, engaging the newer, even more ADD generation, and that it’s easier to start over from scratch versus even attempting to pick up the pieces from the latest wave of employee turnover.

And part of the entire reconning of the company, for some reason, they saw fit to redesign a bunch of logos of notable properties.  And if there’s one thing I’ve learned throughout my career as a creative, fewer things (attempt to) mask mediocrity than the changing of logos of a notable brand(s), or making them in the first place, for inconsequential purposes.  I mean, the City of Atlanta probably burns $10M a year on making logos and branding stupid bullshit while half of that is probably skimmed into the pockets of corrupt bureaucrats to begin with.

But most noteworthy among the rebrandings were the new logomarks for three of their most flagship properties: Batman, Wonder Woman and Superman.  And as the title of this post clearly states, they all absolutely suck.

Batman’s new logo silhouette has been transformed into a multi cutter tool’s blade, seeing as how it’s a very lightly serrated rectangle now.  It seriously looks like if I were to trace this as a stencil onto a piece of sheet metal, cut it out and jerry-rig it into my Ryobi, I could probably use it to fairly efficiently cut through plastics or foams, if I were still at the stage of my life where I would make costumes for Dragon*Con.

Wonder Woman’s logo now isn’t too far from its old iteration, but much like many things that are feminine in nature and display now, it’s been widened, fattened and made to look all thicc, because it’s okay if not all women don’t look like Jim Lee interpretations of females, especially in comics.  But in doing so, it’s almost as if they’ve been successfully bullied out of their own original identity by the growing Whataburger company, who didn’t really do a good job with their own branding to not act like they weren’t completely lifting the original Wonder Woman emblem in the first place.

So let the record show that the regional fast food burger company has successfully bullied the vaunted Wonder Woman out of using her own fucking identity.  Poor form, DC.

Finally, we have Superman’s logo, which at least, manages to at least salvage their traditional five-sided pentagon shape, and is the one logo that seems to retain the closest to its original iteration.  But much like in the world of typography, the original serifs have been lopped off of the S, and for whatever reason, the top left part of the emblem looks really fucking weird to me, because there’s no break in the red from the S and the edge of the emblem and it all bleeds together looking sloppy.  I can interpret that the general thickness of the S probably wouldn’t accommodate for there needing to be any space near the edge of the emblem, but it just looks really off, like Capcom’s shitty logo for not putting any space in the second C and the O of their wordmark that bothers the shit out of me.

And if you were to focus on the yellow parts alone, it looks like a really erect dick about to really overshoot the toilet underneath it, and I hope that any of my zero readers were to read this observation, they would become unable to unsee it, and spread the opinion out to the rest of the world like an obnoxious virus.

So, in conclusion, DC Comics felt the need to reset their shitty universe once again, and for some reason decided to rebrand some of their most iconic properties in the process.  And in changing logos that never needed to be changed in the first place, we’re left with a saw blade, a fat version of the Whataburger logo, and a dick and toilet emblem in the end.

gg dc, wp.

I like to walk past all the Teslas that use sentry mode

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Something that I’ve enjoyed doing over the last few weeks is that when I’m walking to the office after parking my car, I like to deliberately walk closely past all the Teslas that camp the same EV spots that they’re only supposed to be using for four hours max, all day long, every single work day of the week, and triggering the sentry mode for those of them that have it engaged.

TLDR, sentry mode is kind of what it sounds like – when motion is detected too close to the vehicle, the lights engage, and if you’re in a position to where you can see the screen, an ominous looking red glowing orb like the fucking eye of Sauron appears on the screen to let pleebs know that sentry mode has been activated and presumably the cameras are engaged and sending live video to the owner of the vehicle’s mobile device.

When Teslas were a new hot thing, I get why people might want to keep that on.  Curious pleebs might be getting their grubby paws too close to their Teslas and for lesser pleebs, just the warning of them being monitored might be enough to deter them from lingering around too closely. 

Also applicable if the Tesla happened to live in a suspect and/or hood area, the added security might provide some piece of mind, despite the fact that if someone really wanted to fuck with your ride, they’re going to fuck with your ride and short of being ten or less feet away there’s probably nothing that could be done about it if it happened.

However, despite the fact that I own a Tesla myself, there’s no denying the fact that Teslas are basically a dime a dozen these days.  Low-end Model 3s are about as common as Kia Optimas or Honda Accords these days, and there’s very little special about them.  I kind of prefer it this way, because my mentality has always been not wanting to stand out too much from the pack because little good can come from being too conspicuous in most cases, and with that in mind, I’ve never really felt the need to bother with using sentry mode in my own Tesla.

As for the people at my office, I would say two out of every three Teslas that jockey for the EV spaces in the parking lot have sentry mode active in their rides.  Not that there’s anything wrong with treasuring your rides, but I do beef with the fact that all these Tesla drivers are utilizing the EV parking as unofficial assigned parking spaces, and preventing people whom might actually need to charge their vehicles, the ability to do so. 

Therefore, I feel justified in fucking with them a little bit by regularly walking too close to their rides and triggering their sentry modes, with the hopes that they’re getting pinged on their phones where they frantically check the app just to see the same person “innocuously” walking past their cars, multiple times a day.  Of course what I’m doing is completely harmless, but I like to imagine that their paranoia gets the better of them, and they still check every time it happens, only to see that it’s just little ol’ me, making my way to and from the building.

Perhaps if they weren’t so selfish and insistent on camping the EV spots every single day, I wouldn’t trigger their pleeb detectors, but as long as I recognize the same daily campers, I’m going to make a point to closely walk around their rides and trigger their inherent fears of someone fucking with their whips.

The lights engaging make me feel like Derek Zoolander, walking down the runway.

The Ford F-250 Super Chief sounds kind of racist

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

I was driving to work, stuck behind a parade of slow moving commuters as is the usual, but I couldn’t help but notice the behemoth Ford truck that began tailgating me, as if they felt that I was personally responsible for the logjam of cars on the single-lane road we were all headed down.  The third car that I use as my daily commuter is quite small, and the truck plastered on my asshole as if I could shit gold like a Lannister was rather massive and I obviously was not particularly pleased being tailgated so aggressively.

However, I know the capabilities of the car I’m driving, and I’m not at the point of my life where every single interaction on the road needs to result into a street race like Tokyo Midnight Racer, so when the road expanded to a second lane, I stayed put and let the douchebag with the tiny peepee whip around me as soon as they could and take off; it wasn’t worth allowing my blood pressure to elevate just because some fuckhead was riding my ass.

Naturally, the truck did just that, and I noticed the words “Super Chief” on the vehicle, and my brow did a little scrunch – was this the actual name of a level of trim, or was the driver of this car perhaps of indigenous heritage and really wanted the world around him to know that they were of American Indian lineage?  The back window also had a subtle black-on-black decal of an American Indian that kind of looked like the old Washington Redskins logo on it, and I’m thinking to myself that there’s no way this combination of shit came straight out of the factory.

At the next red light, I googled “Ford F150 super chief” and lo and behold, this is actually a legitimate thing, except that it’s an F-250 and not the pleeb-ey little brudder F-150 as I thought it was.  But yeah, the Ford F-250 Super Chief is an actual Ford product, and I can’t help but ponder that it sounds kind of racist, in the sense that we live in a world where the Washington Redskins and Cleveland Indians were taken to the shed and beaten into submission within the span of the last decade, because of their names, and yet here’s Ford, one of the largest auto manufacturers on the planet, naming one of their signature trucks “Super Chief.”

Yes, the word “chief” is not exclusive to Native American culture, but it is prevalent enough in it, to where people like me immediately pull indigenous culture to the forefront when hearing the word, and I can’t help but feel like there’s some racist-sounding undertones with Ford naming a big ass truck “super chief.”

Not just any old chief, but fucking super chief, like it’s the Kryptonian Superman of Native Americans.  Like in Native culture, there are chiefs, but then there’s a level above all the other chiefs, that is the super chief.

Digging a little further, I can’t seem to find any pictures of an F-250 Super Chief with any window stickers of the Washington Redskins chief on it.  So that part of the douchey small peepee truck driver that was riding my ass, had to have been custom to that driver.  I didn’t get a look at the driver themselves, but I sure hope that with brandishing a decal like that, that the driver was actually of Native American culture, and not like one of those white cocksuckers who claim 3/47th Cherokee or some bullshit so that they can try and get a slice of indigenous benefits.  Otherwise, then the Super Chief is being kind of racist, if it’s some white guy driving around in it with that big ass Native sticker on his window.

But either way, now that I know that this is an actual thing, my personal conclusion is that it does seem a little bit racist.  ‘Murica doesn’t seem at all that concerned about that kind of stuff anymore these days, so I guess that it shouldn’t be a surprise.

I am not a fan of MJF’s short reign as American Champion

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

This post could’ve just as easily been called WTF is AEW doing #413, but we’ve gone too far now, and the wheels of writing are already in motion.  But after maybe what, four or five weeks after MJF defeated Will Ospreay for the re-christened American Championship in an absolute banger of a match on Dynamite #250, he gives it right back to Ospreay at All In.

It’s funny because the WWE gets a tremendous amount of flack when they do 50/50 booking, when feuding competitors trade wins back and forth, because “it devalues” both of them having to take losses, but this is a prime example of a zero-sum gain of 50/50 booking between two guys that are expected to be torch bearers for AEW, in MJF and Will Ospreay.

Ospreay takes a loss at Dynamite #250, loses his blet to MJF, and MJF does some really, really outstanding work in the span of him turning it into the American Championship, cashing in on all sorts of cheap heat by taking the title to Mexico and Europe and going ballistic on foreign countries, drawing nuclear amounts of heat in the process.

But instead of continuing to run with this ball that had a tremendous amount of mileage still left in the tank, AEW books MJF to drop the title right back to Will Ospreay, so that MJF can go feud with Daniel Garcia, whom I like, but at the same time, now there’s nobody next in line for Will Ospreay, although I think it’s evidently clear that it’s going to be Ricochet, because Tony Khan doesn’t waste any time at caving to what he and the fans want, which is an inevitable Ospreay vs. Ricochet match.

And just like that, a mega-program between two of the company’s most mega stars is over as quick as it started, all because a notable program needed to be lit and burned for All In just because it was in London and Will Ospreay of course needs to go over in his home country.

Frankly, this is all just extremely short-sighted booking that just occurred, because MJF is probably the most protected man on the entire roster, and he had to take an L, primarily because Tony Khan waited until the last minute to start his science project, panicked and forced two of his top workers to put together a hackneyed program that resulted in both of them taking losses and swapping a belt in rapid succession.  These two guys should be built up for at least six months for a program at Revolution, or Double or Nothing, or whatever one of AEW’s show is supposed to be their grand daddy of them all.

Honestly, I have no doubt in my mind that MJF being the obnoxious asshole American could have gone several more months of him showing up in other countries to wrestle their hot stars, or show up on AEW programming and defeat non-American after non-American for the title.  Frankly, he could have carried this program on as long as he felt like carrying it, because there’s really nobody better than MJF at taking the low-hanging fruit and running with it.

I like Daniel Garcia, but there’s no chance that he could compare with Will Ospreay in carrying his end of a feud.  Ordinarily, I’d say that MJF dropping a mid-card title is really a sign of an impending promotion, but Tony Khan doesn’t seem to follow any logical rules as much as he’s always trying to swerve the audience for really no other reason than because he’s deliberately trying to swerve them for the sake of doing such.

It’s just a shame that it’s going to come at the expense of a rare MJF loss.

Every Braves fan can hear the gears grinding

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Sauce: Dodgers release Jason Heyward, he is free to sign anywhere that will take him

Anyone who’s been paying attention to the Braves this year has probably noticed that the team is operating on its usual Barves-ey cheapskate bullshit, picking up inexpensive castaways, cuts and releases from all the other teams in the league and trying to pawn them off like they’re the answers to the team’s woes and shortcomings.

However, the Braves have been pretty flagrant this year by picking up, almost exclusively, former players, with the hopes that the fans are as dumb as they hope they are (but surprisingly, aren’t) and put happy memories and false optimism on the obvious facts that these guys were all available because they’re not playing as well as they once did in a previous time, like 2021.  Eddie Rosario, Jorge Soler and Luke Jackson are some of the guys re-acquired by the team, with Rosario not only having been cut by the Braves, but he’s also, at the time of me writing this, just freshly cut from the Mets, after already being cut by the Nationals earlier in the year.

Soler hasn’t been terrible, but he also hasn’t been the World Series monster MVP he was in 2021, and Luke Jackson has been what he’s always been – a mediocre reliever, that no longer has Will Smith and a healthy Tyler Matzek and a pre-sucking AJ Minter to hide behind in the bullpen and is getting exposed as of late.  In other words, the Braves picked up mediocre product before the deadline and shouldn’t be surprised by getting mediocre return in investment.

But with the news of Jason Heyward’s release by the Dodgers, I feel like there’s no way in hell that I’m the only Braves fan whose blood went cold upon hearing it, because I think we all collectively knew the second we saw it, what some extreme cheapskate bean counters at The Battery were thinking when they saw it – pick ‘em up!

Believe me, Jason Heyward’s regular season debut on the Opening Day of 2010 is still one of the most magical sports memory I’ll ever have.  The super-typed 20-year old rookie phenom blasting a three-run home run in his very first at-bat against the Chicago Cubs is still stuff of legend, and having a monster rookie season, en route to being one of the core players of the organization for the next few years, all fantastic memories.

Heyward himself was always a stand-up player, a great role model for kids, and a guy that any organization would be happy to have.  I have no ill-will towards the man whatsoever, and I like him personally, but when it comes to his place currently as an active baseball player, I would rather the Braves not Barves, and pick him up, and try to convince fans that they can fix him back to being an All-Star, and insist on trotting him out on the regular, when the team is still somehow, miraculously in the thick of things when it comes to playoff position.

There’s a reason why the Dodgers released him, in favor of Chris Taylor of all people, and any contender like the Braves should probably think twice before considering picking him up, unless they want absolutely nothing but a 9th inning defensive replacement for a corner outfielder.

But I have this sinking feeling that the Braves aren’t going to listen to any logical arguments against Jason Heyward’s return to the team, and are going to be looking at dollar signs, exposure, newspaper articles and editorials about the prodigal son’s return home to Atlanta, and pick him up anyway soon.  The loss of Ronald Acuña, and the tumultuous health of Michael Harris II, outfield depth is stretched thin as it is, but Heyward’s .208 batting average this year really isn’t going to help out.

And these are the things that separate the Braves from being among the league’s elite, in spite of their general, miraculous on-field winning record.  I guess I should be fortunate that the organization continues to field a playoff-caliber team, but at the same time, I kind of wish they’d blow it all up, in order to build a World Series championship-caliber team, but I digress.

As much as I like and admire Jason Heyward the person, as a baseball player, his best years are long beyond him, and the further he stays away from the Braves, the better off the team will ultimately be.