Tag: hypocrisy

So am I Chinese or Japanese?

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Now I’ve been assumed to be many different races in my life; Hispanic, French, black (yes, seriously), but this morning was a new one. Chinese or Japanese I can sort of get, but why black people don’t ever assume Korean as one of the first three options is completely beyond me. Stereotypically, Koreans are the ones who do all the grunt work of modern commerce – dry cleaning, manning the liquor stores, convenience stores, gas stations, delis; where they happen to serve black people on a regular basis! Chinese people seemingly solely work at Chinese restaurants or their respective areas’ Chinese regions. Japanese people are fewer and further but are a lot like the Chinese, except there are lot more doing pretty high-tech, high-importance stuff, because the rest of the world seems to think the Japanese can do no wrong and blows their culture like its shit don’t stink.

But I’m getting off the point. This morning, on a sunny beautiful Saturday afternoon, there’s a ring at the doorbell. Since I now assume all doorbell rings as a sign of casing the joint, I answer immediately. It’s two pleasant black women who are trying to spread the good word of Jesus Christ. I listen to their spiel for a few minutes, but then respectfully decline their literature, because I’m a soulless human being who doesn’t particularly care for organized religion. But before they leave, they ask me “where I’m from.” Since I know this is a pointless question, I tell them the truth – Virginia.

“Oh, well you look like my son in law. He’s half Laotian.“

So now, I look like a cross between Dikembe Mutombo and Kahn Souphanousinphone. Wonderful.

Secondly, I’m ashamed of these religious zealous. The ninth commandment states thou shalt not lie, but it seems like every single black person I meet who wishes to relate to me seems to have an Asian in-law, or they know an Asian closely, that they feel the need to tell me, as if I’ll suddenly allow them into my home or accept them more for disclosing this tidbit of information, which is as useful to me as an asshole on my elbow. I don’t go around bragging about the black friends I have in my life, why others feel the need to share their stories of the Asians they know is completely beyond me. Fuck that.

This would amuse me greatly

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

It all started with a story about a baseball commentator who used the word “sissy” on the air, when a baseball player didn’t steal a base when the situation was pretty much begging him to do such. Innocent enough, perhaps a little too opinionated for a baseball broadcast, but “sissy” is an age-old innocuous jab that still gets the point across to a PG audience.

Or so we thought.

The LGBT comes marching on in, with their metaphorical torches and pitch forks, calling for this commentator’s head because he used the term “sissy,” and according to their manifesto of bullshit, it’s apparently a derogatory term used to describe “them.”  I didn’t realize lesbians, gays, bisexuals, and transgendered people were all one and the same.

Long story short, the commentator had to publicly apologize for doing his job, despite probably not meaning it, which is completely fine with me, mostly to get the LGBT to get off his back and STFU.  All because he said the word “sissy.”

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The swan song of Miss Racial Profiler

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Dear Miss Racial Profiler,

It is my last day on assignment, so I do not feel any remorse for this approach.  But if you thought your weak verbal apology was sufficient for your blatantly ignorant assumption that I was delivering food menus to the hotel because I am Asian, then you are horribly mistaken. You should, and I hope you are ashamed of yourself.  You have no idea how offended I was by your ignorance.  People like YOU disgust me.

And such is the culmination of what turned out to be pretty fun last few days.  The yellow sheet of paper actually has those words written on it.  I could’ve taken the high road and not done any of this, but it’s too good of a story to pass up. This’ll be the last mention of the racial profiler story . . .  I hope.

Turnabout is fair play

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

This car belongs to the woman whom a few days ago decided that she was going to falsely accuse me of being some minimum-wage working chink Uncle Tom who went around hotels, delivering Chinese food menus to hapless hotel rooms.  Racially profiling me because I’m Asian and carrying a black messenger bag does not automatically mean that I am all of the above.

Needless to say, I am not a person that easily offended, but I was pretty offended, disappointed, and bothered by the very real instance of profiling thrown in my direction.  And this is how I deal with it.

She wanted to take a picture of my car to report, so it’s only fair that I return the favor.  She gets off lucky in the fact that I only report it as mindless, brogging content, instead of attempting to accuse me of solicitation (Although I’m sure a woman has been on the news within the last seven minutes/hours/days for committing a crime that I could falsely accuse her of doing). Normally, I’m courteous enough to blur/marquee out license plate information, but I absolve from such courtesies in this instance.  Now granted, I don’t think there’s anyone who reads my brog who has the DMV powers to pinpoint identify whom this car belongs to, let alone visits my site, but I simply like the idea of putting out in plain sight, that “the person who drives this Acura 3.5RL with Virginia tags is an ignorant person.”

What happened to me today? Oh, just a little racial profiling

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

So today I was leaving work today, already feeling a hair disappointed, and I notice this African-American woman getting into her own car.  She’s staring at me, but I don’t think anything of it.  I sit down in my car, and fire up the ignition, and in my peripheral vision, I see movement in my rear-view mirror, and suddenly the lady is standing behind my car, evidently taking a picture of my car, likely the plates.

I quickly get out of my car and say “excuse me.”  No response.  Oh, this better be good.  “Hello?”  No response.  “HEY.  Can I know why you took a picture of my car?”

“Weren’t you the one delivering menus in the hotel?”

Oh, I get it!  The Chinaman, despite wearing a dress shirt, and pin-striped slacks, like 90% of the people in my work complex, is obviously in disguise, to deliver Chinese food menus in the hotel also in the complex!

Continue reading “What happened to me today? Oh, just a little racial profiling” →