Tag: crime

YES!  YES!  YES!  YES!

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

This is how I feel when I read this story.

Basically, when I came across the story about these retard teenagers who went around grocery stores and filmed themselves pretending to trip, flop and flail to the ground while holding gallon containers of milk or other beverages, resulting in massive messes and startled people, I had one of those aw, what the fuck, what is the world coming to, I hate people, humanity is doomed feelings.  It’s not funny, it’s a waste of perfectly good food, and it puts innocent strangers at risk of getting dirtied or possibly slipping themselves.  Worst of all, I didn’t actually think that these guys would get reprimanded for their actions, and would probably keep on doing it, and worse yet, influence other retard trolls to do it too.

The fact that these three worthless fucks are being nailed with criminal charges for destruction of property and disorderly conduct makes me happier than when I see a single driver actually getting caught and pulled over in the HOV lane.  The faith in humanity gauge rises a little bit, upon hearing this news.  I hope their haji father/uncle goes all old country on them and beats the living shit out of them too, for having now becoming criminals.

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Well, at least he didn’t get killed on the job

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Well, to each, his own. I chose my path, you chose the way of the hero. And they found you amusing for a while, the people of this city. But the one thing they love more than a hero is to see a hero fail, fall, die trying.

On one hand, it’s good to know that Darien Long isn’t going to die on the job. But on the other hand, it’s ironically unfortunate that not only has Darien Long been let go from his job, he’s also been arrested. For doing god’s work and trying to heaven forbid, actually make a mall a better and safer place.

I get all the facts that have surfaced around both the circumstances of his release as well all his arrest, but it all just doesn’t really feel that right regardless.

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Isn’t it ironic

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

That with the start of February marks the start of Black History Month, and one of the biggest things to start circulating on the web now is a heroic black mall cop enforcing some necessary black-on-black justice, but because all parties involved are black, it’s one gigantic racial clusterfuck.  Obviously, this is all taking place in Atlanta, and making worldwide news as far as to where it’s covered by the Daily Mail.

As I alluded to, by calling him heroic, I think favorably of this guy.  And he’s smart too, by arming himself not just with a taser and retractcable clubs, but it’s all about the GoPro he wears on his vest, that’s taking video evidence of everything he’s doing and everything everyone he’s looking at is doing.  It’s like that part in Hot Fuzz where Simon Pegg is telling Nick Frost that the most important piece of equipment that they have as police officers is their notepads; except in the case of this mall cop, his notepad has evolved a little bit, and is capturing everything verbatim in live video.  I admire the fact that he’s not only arming himself, but also using his head to protect himself as best as possible.

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Too easy

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

$65,000 worth of chicken wings stolen.  The story is a week old, and I can’t believe I missed it then, but yeah…  Too easy.

Although, it isn’t as easy as wrapping my head around the fact that it was actually $65,000 worth of chicken wings stolen.  According to the story, it was ten pallets.  There’s smart thievery, and then there’s just greed.  Smart thievery is skimming a little bit at a time over a large spectrum, which in this case would have been removing one or two packages from every single pallet in the warehouse; that might not be nearly as easy to notice, and by the time suspicion piqued, the pallets could have already been opened, wings cooked served, and nothing can be done.  Greed is just taking ten pallets straight up and hoping nobody notices the absence of ten entire pallets.

And… there’s really nothing more to say, other than once again, the obvious statement: too easy.

The worst-case scenario bowl

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

If anyone were to ask me who I would want to win the Super Bowl, I would go all Socrates on them, and ask them, “do you remember that scene from The Dark Knight Rises where Bane detonates all the gunpowder-laced concrete, and it destroys the ground underneath the football stadium, killing two entire football teams, except for Hines Ward who outruns all of it en route to scoring a kick-return touchdown?”

And when the response is obviously yes, because I probably wouldn’t associate myself with anyone who hasn’t seen The Dark Knight Rises, then I would say that that’s precisely how I would prefer this year’s Super Bowl to end up, except I don’t want anyone to score a touchdown at all, and would prefer that the kick returner just narrowly fall short of the end zone and fall to his death a step short of scoring.

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I don’t get you people sometimes

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Back in 2007, pro-wrestler Chris Benoit was discovered dead, along with his wife and his son.  Immediately afterward, the WWE broke all storylines for one night, and put together an entire tribute show for Chris Benoit and his family, where there were some great matches, but most notably an array of tear-filled, emotional outpourings of interviews of Benoit’s fellow wrestlers sharing touching stories and memories of their fallen comrade.

Days later, it was revealed that it wasn’t an attack on the family by a second party that ended up with the Benoit family dead; it was Chris Benoit himself, who had murdered his wife and his son, before hanging himself.  Suddenly, all of the RIPs to Chris Benoit were rescinded, the WWE did everything they could to break association with Chris Benoit, and wrestlers everywhere expressed emotions of betrayal, disappointment and disgusted sadness at the guy they all thought they once knew.

It wasn’t really “rest in peace” anymore, as much as it was “good riddance, you fucking murderer.”

Recently, a player on the Kansas City Chefs, Jovan Belcher, murdered his girlfriend and mother of their three-month old child, and then killed himself.  This has all been confirmed and is all fact at this point – Jovan Belcher was a murderer before he killed himself.

So why the fuck are so many people bidding him to rest in peace?  The guy is a fucking murderer, and fellow football players, and people all over twitter are wishing him the same farewell, reserved for people who live their lives honorably, or at least without committing murder?

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Steal from Walmart, get owned – to death

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

A sadistic part of me finds morbid amusement at reading about the tyranny and carnage that occasionally takes place during each year’s Black Fridays.  As unfortunate as it is that the worst stories that emerge from Black Fridays typically include death, I can’t help but be astonished at some of the lengths people will sometimes go to in order to get their grubby hands on particular doorbuster items.

I saw this story of a man getting essentially brutalized to death at Walmart, and was kind of half-surprised, half-not surprised at the fact that it led to an AJC link, meaning the incident took place in the greater Metro Atlanta area.  I’m never really surprised when some of the worst things happen in Atlanta, because that’s kind of how I perceive this place sometimes.

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