Tag: job

A day in the life of 99.9999% of Korean men*

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment
  • 0730 – Wake up
  • 0731 – Smoke
  • 0800 – Leave for work
  • 0801 – Smoke in car
  • 0820 – Get stuck in Atlanta traffic
  • 0821 – Smoke in frustration
  • 0855 – Arrive at work
  • 0900 – Smoke break
  • 0910 – Run into Korean co-worker on the way back in
  • 0911 – Don’t want buddy to smoke alone
  • 1000 – Starbucks walk
  • 1010 – Smoke on the way back
  • 1020 – Brush teeth in men’s room rid smoke breath
  • 1030 – Actual work
  • 1200 – Smoke break
  • 1230 – Lunch
  • 1230 – Smoking also
  • 1330 – Brush teeth again
  • 1335 – Work
  • 1500 – Smoke break
  • 1515 – Work
  • 1600 – Smoke break
  • 1615 – Realize it’s past 4pm, phone in day, go smoke
  • 1700 – Leave
  • 1700 – Smoke on the way to the car
  • 1710 – Get stuck in Atlanta traffic
  • 1711 – Smoke in frustration
  • 1735 – Victory smoke in getting out of traffic
  • 1800 – Arrive home
  • 1805-2200 – Eat dinner, polish off pack of smokes, etc

*does not include dannyhong

 

Fonts aren’t supposed to be sexy

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

For whatever reason, my work machine did not have Helvetica installed on it, I recently learned.  No big deal; all the fonts are housed on one of the many servers that this company uses, so I go to said folder labeled “Fonts,” only to discover that there are about 16 sub-folders, of equally ubiquitous titles.  While perusing through one of these folders, I scrolled past this file.  No, your eyes do not deceive you.

If this were a link to a website, I would most certainly have steered clear from examining this file.  But since whatever this is, is claiming to be a TrueType font, I couldn’t help but examine what the preview was going to generate.

Now I’m too lazy to go back and take a print-screen of the preview page, but I can assure you that it is indeed a typeface, albeit one nobody in their right mind would probably use.  Even sex sites and porn shops would have a hard time using such a typeface because as amusing as it is, aesthetically, it’s a pretty shitty font.  Google it yourself, if you’re curious.

Dear world

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

PowerPoint is not graphic design software, never has, and never will be. If you wish for me to work on PowerPoint for your companies, I will do such since I am a slave to the rat race, but know that making me do such, I will harbor legitimate hatred for you and your company. Fuck PowerPoint and fuck you too.

What’s douchier than people who drive BMW cars?

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Guys who drive BMW motorcycles.  There’s a guy in the office that needs to let everyone know that he drives a BMW motorcycle, indicative by the way he’s always wearing his fluorescent green BMW “air shell” jacket in the office, despite the fact that it’s 87 degrees in the City of Atlanta right now.  And the way he perches his fluorescent green BMW helmet on the edge of his desk, so that everyone who walks by or looks down the corridor can see it, like a beacon of douchiness in the office.  I have to imagine that when he’s in his full autocross get-up, he looks like a fucking lightning bug humping a football, or at least, like someone who ate something radioactive.

Needless to say, having been here for the last two months, I’ve got a fairly good grasp of the people who work here, and most importantly for the sake of conversation, the people I don’t really care for, and are capable of griping about in brog format.  Furthermore, I’ve been here long enough to where I now feel entitled to gripe about my job, more so than when I was here, greener than Lex Luger.

Continue reading “What’s douchier than people who drive BMW cars?” →

Wondering why I’m not online today?

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

As humorous as it is, and kind of comeuppance to Jen for all those years she got to boast about having today off, but as far as I know, just the state of Georgia has a state holiday today, and at least to me, it sucks.  Confederate Memorial Day.  What sucks isn’t the fact that it’s more or less a day celebrating the unification of a faction that thrived on slavery and unequal rights for human beings, no, I can accept that as a piece of American history.  That’s fine.  What sucks for me is the fact that because I’m a freelancer, and live by the hourly wages, this is a day in which I am not getting paid at all, because the state government agency I work for does not operate on this “holiday.”

I feel like I should write something

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Considering it is my birthday and all, but I don’t really have anything substantial to say that I haven’t said in a past birthday before, probably.  Although my day is getting better, probably because I’m simply not in Virginia anymore, and the Willy’s burrito I just consumed for lunch, things aren’t necessarily as chipper as some people might expect for their birthdays to be.

As mentioned, I got home really late last night, and missed an entire day of work.  I’m grateful that my car was okay, and I really just wanted to move forward.  Waking up this morning, I went for a run and did some basic lifts to help prevent me from becoming a monumental fat fuck.  I get into work, just wanting to pass the time through the day, but it turns out the queer-jew that sits behind me is hacking his lungs out.  Perturbed by such a nuisance, I offer him an antihistamine for his allergies, except he explains to me that it’s not allergy, but a cold.  Fuckin’ great.  I hear him hacking away for the next few hours, me getting pissed because it’s loud and obnoxious, and the Starbucks fucked up my free birthday drink and got something that wasn’t no-whip, but no-taste.  I’m debating on forfeiting more work so that queer-jew doesn’t get me sick with his incessant uncovered coughing, but distressed over the fact that I’ve already missed eight hours already due to the airport snafu.  I’m sour.  Everyone around me is seemingly sour.  Not much of a good birthday feeling so far.  I stew.

Then, I find out that queer-jew is leaving early anyway, capitalizing on the corporate negligence that seemingly absolves employees of not being present if they’re going to a doctor’s appointment or something, so I’m delighted to hear that queer-jew will stop bitching about how his diminishing sick time, and by the time I get back to the office, he and his AIDS will be gone.  Now, I can relax my shoulders a bit, and coast through the rest of the day, and hope to have a relaxing dinner with some friends to celebrate this whole birthday thing out on a good note.

Otherwise, not much else to say, bringing in this year.  Not my greatest birthday evar, but at least I’m thankful to be home now.

The importance of ass

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

It most certainly is important.

Unfortunately, this powerpoint isn’t really as entertaining as one so aptly titled might be, but even despite the forgone conclusion, I still couldn’t help but feel a tad hopeful that maybe it wasn’t just a coincidentally poor abbreviation as result of an egregiously long file name.

Lately, this work assignment’s been a little tedious.  The person I work directly under is out for the next ten days or so, so I thought I might have it a little easy without concern of someone watching what I’m doing on the side behind my back.  However, the traffic manager here recently retired, so there are about three different people bringing me work now, constantly interrupting me, and sniffing around over my shoulders, so such hopes for a relaxing work environment where I could do some substantial writing on the side are a bit dashed.