Tag: tryharding

#TRYHARDSZN2024: Oh he’s got jokes

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

酱: Massachusetts teenager accepted into numerous colleges, including several Ivy League schools; including Harvard

You can always tell the difference between a #TRYHARD that got into a whole bunch of really good schools and the ones who got into a whole bunch of schools, regardless of quality, because the articles about them won’t bother to talk about an aggregate of scholarship dollars, and just start dropping names of the prestigious schools that the tryhard got into.

In the case of this particular #TRYHARD, he definitely falls into the former, where the boy shot for the moon and got quite a few hits out of it.  Out of his alleged 20-21 college applications he fired out, among the schools that he will not be selecting to attend are Cornell, Brown and Stanford; because he was accepted into Harvard.

It doesn’t sound like Harvard themselves is giving him a free ride, but apparently this #TRYHARD tryharded enough to have been awarded something called a Gates scholarship which completely covers the cost of any four-year college.  The fact that he’s cashing it in on Harvard makes me think of those assholes at Starbucks who wait all year for their free, no-strings attached Starbucks birthday drink, and compete with all the other assholes to see who can get the most ludicrously expensive drink concoction they can get, and they end up walking away with a cup of caffeinated liquid sugar that should’ve been like $72.

Regardless, the #TRYHARD seemed ready for his news story with a joke, that was the perfect mixture of passive-aggressive humblebragging and Chinese dryness in the arena of humor:

I was like, yes, I got into a local school,” Ly said. “My Mom was like, yay, my son got into Harvard and so she was super happy.”

With the best part being his mom’s response and the boy having to explain that she was in fact, “super happy.”

And because a lot of these #TRYHARDs have to sound as insufferably passively arrogant as possible, he had this to say about Stanford:

I was kind of praying they didn’t take me — because then I didn’t want to make the decision,” he said.

Because somewhere in that psyche of his, is probably the oppressed wanderlust that exists from an academic Chinese kid most likely sheltered by his parents under the necessity to excel at whatever it takes to get into Harvard or Yale, and the idea of getting into a prestigious school out west, and getting as far as humanly possible from his family probably was an appealing fantasy for him.

But in the end, the dutiful aZn son wins out, and when it comes to Asian parents, it doesn’t matter if Harvard or Yale are even the best schools in America, their namesake alone is all they need to be able to actually be proud of this #TRYHARD child, so they can endlessly brag to their Chinese peers about how their kid is Harvard bound and that theirs are probably not.

#TRYHARDSZN2024: Oh the humblebragging

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Salsa: 17-year old Southern California girl accepted into 15 universities, among them a free ride to Harvard

As the title to this post might indicate, this #TRYHARD doesn’t hesitate to throw a little bit of shade while simultaneously humblebragging about her achievement-worthy number of acceptances into many well-reputable schools.  However, unlike a lot of tryhards out there, this one actually acknowledges the fact that she had taken a few L’s in the sense that she had been waitlisted and rejected by some schools:

I didn’t think I was going to get into any of the top colleges because I had been waitlisted and rejected a couple days before and also day of,” Figueroa said. “So, I was like, there’s no way I could get into Harvard or anything like that.”

Naturally, quotes like this are brought to you by the fact that not only did she get accepted into Harvard, but she also managed to secure a free ride as well.  Considering her mind-bending 4.7 GPA and her extracurriculars, it shouldn’t be surprising that she got in, but getting a free ride is an impressive feat in itself. 

Sometimes I think Harvard dangles free rides to kids further away, with the hopes that they don’t take the bait, and they the school can still try to use it as a leverage play with donors, boosters and those who hold the purse strings to cry poor, that kids aren’t taking free rides anymore because they presumably not offering up enough incentive to get kids to pick fucking Harvard among other schools in the nation.

What I am a little curious about is what schools did turn her down, considering that aside from Harvard, some of the other schools she did get into were Brown and Columbia, two other Ivies, as well as Stanford, Duke and Berkeley and a whole bunch of Cali-based safety schools which obviously she won’t be going to.  It would be funny if it were schools like Georgia Tech or USC or Oregon State that rejected her.

But the obnoxious thing about this particular #TRYHARD is how insufferably wishy-washy she’s trying to sound, pretending like she’s deliberating where she’s going to pick, as if she were LeBron James or some highly-touted high school football recruit grandstanding some selection day show for where they want to go to school:

I didn’t think I was going to get into Harvard so my dream school was Columbia and I honestly think I’m preferring Harvard now, so I think I might go there instead,”

It’s like bitch please, not only did you get into Harvard, you got a free ride; we all know what the answer is going to be, especially if Columbia or Stanford isn’t giving you a free ride so just shut the fuck up and stop humblebragging, because it’s coming off as insufferable and obnoxious.

If there’s one thing that remains consistent between the different tiers of #TRYHARDS, it’s that being tryhards always equates into being entitled to being obnoxiously humblebraggy about their accomplishments, to the degree where it seems like that’s solely the reason why they applied to so many goddamn schools in the first place.

#TRYHARDSZN2024: I wonder what question he got wrong on his SATs?

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Four countries: Vietnamese student has been admitted to numerous schools spanning four different countries, including “several in the U.S.”

Instead of flexing a large number of acceptances like American #TRYHARDs do, this Vietnamese #TRYHARD has gotten into the habit of flexing the number of countries in which he’s gotten acceptances from; I have to say that that’s kind of the level of overachieving that can only be done by an Asian person.

The article cites that he’s gotten acceptances from schools in the U.S., Canada, England, as well as his residence in Singapore; off the top of my head, I’m inclined to think that this cream of his crop is probably the acceptance into Cambridge, because the article doesn’t mention that he got into any of the Ivy Leagues, which is typically the dream goal of any Asian #TRYHARD.

In fact, the only American school that was mentioned in this particular article was none other than Georgia Tech, to which I know I clown on because of ACC sport rivalry, is still a great school in general, but especially for computer science, which this particular #TRYHARD seems to have an endless hard-on for.

But the thing is, if Georgia Tech is the only American school that was mentioned here, I’m inclined to believe that the rest of the “several” U.S. schools in which he gained admittance into probably aren’t going to be any higher tier than GT.

I get that computer science appears to be his jam, passion and at the core of whatever he does with his career, but when it comes to college, perception is still reality, and when he finishes school and gets out into the real world, I feel like recruiters and employers are going to be more likely to stop and hesitate to take a glance at a candidate with Cambridge on his resume over a fairly niche school like Georgia Tech.

Either way, I have to say that I was quite tickled at the fact that this one kid got a 1590/1600 on his SATs; which means he missed one question on the entire exam, that prevented him from getting that perfect score that would definitely have gotten him noticed by pretty much every school he applied to.  His dad probably is full of disappointment, and at this point, he probably feels like it’s worse to get 1590 and fall just short of perfection, than to have gotten like a 1310 like I did, and just be slightly above average in terms of scoring.

To think, it’s probably that one question that separated his one kid from the Ivy Leagues and Georgia Tech.

#TRYHARDSZN2024: Tryharding out of boredom

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Sauce: St. Louis #TRYHARD accepted into 40 different schools

I’m going to go out on a limb and say this is probably one of the weaker #TRYHARDs of the season, since of all this one’s 40 acceptances, there are no notables named, and from the cherry-picked humblebrag screen shots of her holding acceptances, none of the schools that I can see are particularly anything to ring home about.

Plus, no academic merits were listed anywhere in the article, which means that this kid didn’t have a brag-worthy SAT score, ACT score, GPA, AP class regimen or already begun amassing college credits.  But hey, she can wrestle and is a part of the step team!

Naturally the weakness of a #TRYHARD usually resorts to the cumulative amount of scholarship dollars they’ve been offered, and in this case, this #TRYHARD has amassed over $1M in offers but lest we forget that it doesn’t work that way and $1M does not go to the school of choice.

What really sets me off about this particular #TRYHARD is the seemingly flippant attitude demonstrated when it came to the college application process, to which anyone who’s ever done one knows, is a colossal pain in the ass where you might excited and optimistic when you start, but by the time you’re getting to the end, you’re over it and glad to just be done with it.  And to repeat that process more than 3-4 times, to the magnitude of 40+?  Yeah fuck that.

But for this #TRYHARD, applying to colleges is something that she seemingly did, out of boredom:

I would just be sitting in my room applying, just as I am with scholarships right now. When I’m bored, I’m just applying. When I’m not bored, I’m just applying,” the 18-year-old said.

For starters, I’m guessing there’s some amended process available to them, otherwise I don’t think they’re filling out 40+ college applications.  Either that, or they’re copy/pasting their personal essays, if they’re required to write one, and I’m sure colleges are as thrilled to be reading someone’s copy/paste as much as the kids are thrilled to have to write them in the first place.

But it’s the attitude of someone applying out of boredom that kind of irks me; now I didn’t finish college in the traditional sense, but I still know that there’s a lot of power in the degree, and I know the value of a strong education.  It make me feel annoyed that there are people who apply for schools out of boredom, and I’ve touched on this before, because if and when they are accepted, they’re effectively blocking someone else from getting the spot, and forcing people to be put on waitlists until #TRYHARDSZN winds down, people make their choices, and the scraps of slots are re-opened up to people who have had to wait.

Fortunately in the case of this #TRYHARD, it doesn’t seem like a lot of necessarily prestigious schools are being clogged up by her.  Based on her aspirations and what I can tell are some of her acceptances, there was a fairly mid-tier ceiling to all of her boredom applications.

Considering her top pick is Alabama State, I’m guessing they’re one of the schools that probably offered a full-ride, and there’s nothing wrong with phishing for that because school is an expensive endeavor, but I’m also allowed to opine that as #TRYHARD as applying to 40+ schools is, settling on a school like Alabama State might be reaching for some low-hanging fruit.

#TRYHARDSZN2024: Not Exclusive to America

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Reach for the stars, boy: 12th grader in Hanoi accepted into multiple schools in America, including two of Ivy Leagues

One of the primary differences I noticed about an Asian news outlet reporting a #TRYHARD versus an American one is that they don’t hide the fact that these kids might not be batting 1.000 when it comes to acceptance rates:

received acceptance letters from 11 out of 17 U.S. universities he applied to this admissions season.

So in high-expectation Asian dad logic, boy failed six times, full stop.  Disgrace get out of my house

The only consolation to this colossal failure is that among the schools that he did get accepted into, they were some notable places, like Yale and Cornell, two of the Ivy Leagues, as well as well-known schools like Johns Hopkins and Duke. 

But not Harvard, that was probably one of his six failures.  In fact, all six of those failures were probably the Ivies he didn’t get into.  SMH

The funny thing is that as altruistic as his ambitions are, his resume isn’t nearly as impressive as some other ones I’ve seen this #TRYHARDSZN2024.  Failed to get into six schools, didn’t get a perfect SAT score, 1540/1600, scored a 4 or 5 in all his AP courses, and the kicker, does not have a 4+ GPA.  He’s close, with a 3.95, but this SZN alone we’ve seen numerous kids with like 4.5+ which means this boy is clearly dicking around with his life way too much probably playing League of Legends or watching streamers and not studying instead.

For real though, unlike a lot of these #TRYHARDS this one seems to actually be reaching for the stars and going to Yale, and not necessarily phishing for a free ride somewhere, and going to take what’s going to make the most economic sense, not that there’s anything wrong with that either.

Because unlike a lot of other #TRYHARDS, this one admits that he comes from a privileged family, which answers the question of how he might be able to afford Yale’s alleged $64K yearly tuition which probably doesn’t account for books, boarding, food and discretion.

And that’s the one big divide that separates this #TRYHARD from all others, because this one comes from money, and Vietnam is no America in terms of wealth, but they’re also no Nicaragua either; but that doesn’t stop him from being a #TRYHARD and applying to a boatload of schools that people without as much privilege but not too little and get their application fees waived, cannot afford to.

#TRYHARDSZN2024: That’s one way to get out of Arkansas

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Just 4?  Arkansas high school senior accepted into four Ivy League schools among numerous other acceptances

Not a lot of context given with this tryhard.  But at least 7 On My Side doesn’t question the intelligence of its readers by giving some superficial combined value of all her college acceptances and claim she’s miraculously in possession of $1.6M scholarship dollars, because that’s always bullshit in the grand spectrum of #TRYHARDSZN.

But 16 college acceptances, with four of them being Ivy Leagues, not bad.  Harvard, Colombia, Penn and Cornell, and with the article not even mentioning money, it’s my assumption that these are merely acceptances and good luck getting together the money to tuition sure hope daddy is a doctor of the variety that actually makes money.

Otherwise a good scattering of college acceptances that are actually named, which means that this kid isn’t just flinging college applications into the wind like Gambit throwing cards, with almost all of them being out of state, which is a safe assumption that this kid wants the fuck out of Arkansas.

Considering what her family name is, and the fact that her biliteracy is in Arabic, which I can’t imagine is particularly useful in a state like fucking Arkansas, I imagine the goal is ultimately to get out of the state by any means necessary, but if she can manage to get a decent education in the process, then that’s a double win.

Laughably, the article does point out that the one full-ride offer she has, is to Hendrix; not going to lie, I had to Google them, and it turns out that they’re a liberal arts college in, you guessed it: Arkansas.  And when decision time comes about, that full-ride is always a hard thing to ignore, especially from families of immigrants.

You know what they say though, sometimes if you don’t tryhard, you die hard, which I’ve literally never heard anyone say but one of my close friends.

#TRYHARDSZN2024: Never too early to start

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Source: 15-year old Texas girl has been accepted into 38 universities, amassing a combined $1.6M in scholarship dollars

I think one of the funniest tropes of #TRYHARDSZN is how often times those reporting on these tryhards, they always try to make it sound like their combined scholarship value is free and clear, and they’re eligible to use all of it on the institution that they ultimately choose.  

No, it doesn’t quite work that way, and just because someone has been accepted to 38 schools and the combined value of the offered scholarships is $1.6M doesn’t mean the person can take the offered scholarships from like Louisiana Tech, Furman, Oregon State and William & Mary and funnel them all into Columbia University.

The probably reality with most of these #TRYHARDSZN stories is that they’re accepted into a lot of higher-tier schools at little to no scholarship dollars at all, and it’s the lower-tier schools in which are offering up free rides or high dollar value scholarships, and the figures are extrapolated to whatever sounds the most impressive when combined together, but I digress.

Back to the story at hand, as tryhard-y as it is, the resume of this 15-year old is pretty impressive.  Graduating from high school at 15, already notching 51 college credit hours, with a 4.0 GPA, and a bunch of extracurricular resume-boosting clubs to boot.

It’s funny to me that one of quotes of someone to vouch for her character is coming from one of her elementary school teachers; considering she was there like four weeks ago, it’s safe to say that they were still a fresh resource to reach out to gauge the character of this student.

Don’t get me wrong, on internet paper, this girl sounds like a very impressive person, to have accomplished so much at such a young age.  But whether it’s her decision or it came at the encouragement of her parents, I’m perplexed on this seeming determination to speed-run through contemporary schooling and get to the stage of adulthood, even if the age is not commensurate.

It’s stated that she was able to get to this point because she didn’t have to complete the eighth grade, fifth grade and kindergarten, by virtue of exams, and I’m thinking, skipping kindergarten??  I vaguely remember kindergarten being merely supervised playing, painting with my hands, nap times where I didn’t once actually nap, and occasional practicing letters and numbers.  

My oldest child who still sleeps in overnight diapers.  She throws tantrums when she thinks she’s getting the smaller half of anything in comparison to her younger sister.  She will be in kindergarten in two years.  I’m amazed that there’s even an option to try to exam out of having to do kindergarten, because I can’t imagine what they’d even examine given the criteria of what kindergarteners do.

The point is, Little Miss Tryhard has basically not been given much of a chance to be a kid in her lifetime, and as impressive as it sounds that she’s basically trying to be Doogie Howser academically, she might accomplish graduating college by 17-18, but when school’s all out, and the only thing really left in life is to pursue a career, she is going to be a guppy in an ocean of inexperience, and when she steps into the working world where everyone is competition, she’s probably not going to be remotely mentally and emotionally prepared for what awaits.

Sure it sounds cool, and I’m sure it feels good to be praised and get a lot of e-accolades from anonymous strangers on the internet because she got accepted into a bunch of unnamed schools, but this is a situation where being such a tryhard can have some severe consequences later in life.

All living things need to breathe, and unwind and decompress from time to time, or else  they’re going to work themselves crazy.  But if you’re tryharding and trying to speed-run life, it’s almost like you’re rushing to get into the rat race, where most everyone becomes miserable and really begins to feel like their lives are on a downward trajectory instead of upward.