Things White People Like: Black and White Houses

Part of observing the world around me, is occasionally identifying patterns.  I like to think that I’m a pretty observant person, and I feel like I’m pretty good at identifying patterns, especially when I see commonalities in behavior or tendencies in demographics.

To cut to the chase and keep my word count down and free of paragraphs of extraneous fluff, I’ve determined that white people are extremely willing to accept questionable aesthetics and/or quickly latch onto the new and niche, as long as the result of their collective acceptance makes something “theirs.”

And once something becomes a white people thing, all the other basic white people begin to glom onto it and perpetuate the stereotype even stronger and give it more and more momentum, to where it gets to this point where upon visual identification of it from the rest of the world, it’s automatically associated with being a white people thing.

In the past, I have brogged about things about how white people really love Major League Soccer, and how white people really love the new Ford Bronco, but I’ve given this a lot more thought than I probably should have considering all the things in the world that would be slightly more productive to think about alternatively, but to the point where this could potentially become a series of posts or at least worth justifying the existence of a white people tag on the brog.

Over the last, I’d say four years, I’ve noticed a trend in home design, along with a correlation of seemingly only white people partaking in it: black and white homes.  Homes that are entirely black and white, be it white brick, white panel, white siding. 

I’m talking straight up white; #FFFFFF white, 0.0.0.0 white.  Not “bone,” not “French white” or any shade of white that has any iota of colored pigmentation in it whatsoever.  Just fucking default plain white, but all over the home.

And then comes the black, usually in trim, shutters, doors, maybe an accent wall or side of the home.  Garage door(s), gutters, support beams, full on black.  #000000 black, 100.100.100.100 black.

Homes like these, I’ve seen an increase of them popping up all around the city, especially in the little bubble of zip codes that I live in, since I do live in an area with a high concentration of white people.  Roads that I’ve driven on, I’ve seen homes that clearly sold during the nuclear real estate boon just a year ago, and it’s evident that the new owners tore down the old homes, and erected these black and white, white people monuments in their place.  Empty lots or little parcels of land in which I didn’t even think that a home could be built upon, now have homes that are more black and white than a weekday newspaper comics page.

Even a home in my own neighborhood, frankly one that I would’ve gone after myself it were available at the time in which I was looking for a house, I remember walking in my neighborhood one day, and I nearly went snow blind when they had completely whitewashed the entire fucking home, before they put their all-black trim on it.  Like, this couple paid a large sum of money to transform their ordinary home into this gaudy black and white structure smack dab in the middle of a cul-de-sac with more ordinary looking homes all around it.

And the thing is, although my sample size is small in confirmation, I’d wager a good bit that every single one of these homes is resided by white people.  Many of the homes that come to mind while I’m writing this post I know by virtue of visual confirmation of the residents that they’re white, others have some serious tells that they’re resided by white people, most notably shit like big fucking Dodge Ram trucks, orange guy or Yosemite Sam political signs out in front, among other very obvious white people-centric things that easily fill in the blank.

The bottom line is that black and white houses have become this very obvious indicator of white people living somewhere, and I imagine I’m going to be flabbergasted the day I drive past a black and white house, and I see a minority coming out the door or garage.  However, I imagine that when such a day occurs, similar to the fashion in which white people abandoned cities throughout US history, it will probably mean that white people have begun to abandon ship on the trend are on the prowl for something other home aesthetic trend that they can make theirs, before any colored folk decide to get in on the trend.

Dad Brog (#138): About that “fake” global warming

I remember when I was a kid, outdoor play was as regular as going to school or a job; something you did on almost a daily basis.  Summer vacation saw tons of playing outside, I have tons of memories of exploring the woods, playing basketball, practicing rollerblading, and all sorts of things done solely outdoors.

Sure, the summertime would be hot, but we kids would pop outdoors without blinking an eye, and spend hours playing basketball, or just wandering aimlessly.  Personally, I don’t ever recollect putting on sunscreen at any time, and I’d go outside, do shit, and be content to come back home sweaty and relieved to be out of the heat, but otherwise not worrying about dehydration and excessive sun exposure.

The other day, I was at a parent orientation for my kids’ preschool, talking to the teachers about what to expect for the upcoming year, and a question that mythical wife had asked was if they adhered to the county protocol when it comes to heat advisory, to which they did, which was good to know, seeing as how often the temperatures here in Georgia are 95F+, which is that if the heat index exceeds a certain threshold, kids are not sent outside for recess.

Sure, there’s a knee-jerk reaction somewhere that wants to call everyone today soft and that they need to toughen up and get out in the sun and live a little, but the more rational part of my brain also understands and acknowledges the existence of global warming, and in spite of the dumbasses of the country who like to claim that it’s fake news, the fact of the matter is that every summer seems like it gets to become the hottest one ever, and we’re getting to the point where the act of going outside in the summertime comes with actual health risks involved.

My kids have gotten to the point where their general love of books, puzzles and board games has been diminishing a little bit, and they really want to be active and do physical activities, like playing tag, hide-and-seek and just plain run around and expend the gas tanks worth of energy that kids this young are in disposal of.  I want to be able to oblige them, and it kills me that I have to always be cognizant of the heat index conditions, and over the last few weeks of this summer, it’s either been torrential downpour or temperatures well in excess of 95F, with the heat index being even higher.

And I keep them inside, because they’re not old enough to be mindful of dehydration and exertion in the sun and heat yet, and I’ve seen them be affected by lesser temperatures, so I don’t want to subject them to the risk, just because they’re a little bored and antsy.  It’s like the outdoors, as beautifully sunny and picturesque it can be sometimes, is like an episode of Dual Survival or that mission in Mass Effect 2, where you had to rescue Tali from the planet that was too close to a sun, where excessive exposure to the sun would erode your shields and health.

The point of this post is that I just think it really sucks that I have to err on side of caution with my kids and taking them outdoors, because global warming is a very real fucking thing and the planet isn’t just hotter than it was 30 years ago, it’s gotten to the point where everyone has to exercise a ton of caution, preparation and basically gearing up, just to go outside.  It’s obnoxious and bothersome when dumbasses like to proclaim their opinion that it’s not a real thing, because there’s monumental amounts of evidence that says that it is.

As much as I’d love for my kids to have the kind of childhood that had the type and amount of outdoor play as mine did, I just don’t think it’s going to be possible, at least without elevating their risks of physical harm, dehydration and skin cancer risks.  It’s not fair to the kids of tomorrow to have to deal with the consequences of the generations long before them, and it makes me anxious and disappointed that I’m going to have to basically wait until like October before it’s going to be really comfortable and adequate to play outside with my kids.

Predictable, to those with knowledge

Twas the night of the trade deadline, and the Braves were in the middle of the pack.  The Phillies have the division, and Atlanta’s grip on Wild Card #1 has been slippery as of late.  Max Fried is on the DL, joining Ozzie Albies and Michael Harris II, while Ronald Acuña, Jr. and Spencer Strider are done for the year.  Reynaldo Lopez has tightness in his forearm. 

Those not injured, are not performing, save for Marcell Ozuna and a resurgent Jarred Kelenic, but Matt Olson, Austin Riley, Adam Duvall and Orlando Arcia definitely are about as reliable as a Dodge Caliber this season.  Aside from Chris Sale, the pitching staff is in shambles due to the loss of Strider and Fried, as Father Time has clearly caught up to Charlie Morton, and the revolving door of Bryce Elder, Spencer Schwellenbach and whomever was scheduled to pitch in Double-A or Triple-A has been less than effective.

Weeks leading up to the trade deadline, there was all sorts of buzz about what the Atlanta Braves should do, to patch their weaknesses, reinforce their offense and build for the playoffs that they are no guarantee to even make.  Braves fans in Facebook communities, blogs and websites all throwing out ideas, mostly putrid, but occasional logical ones, about the things the teams should do in order to accomplish all of the above mentioned.

And whenever this time of the baseball season comes up, there are always these types of fans:

  • Trade everything for [Mike Trout] and [Shohei Ohtani] – fans who don’t really know much about baseball economics and think that in real sport, you can make trades like an EA game and trade Derek Harper for Penny Hardaway straight up
  • Trade absolutely nothing at all because there’s no chance the return on investment will be worth the cost of assets being given up – internet bean-counters who know way too much about baseball economics and have this intrinsic belief that absolutely every baseball transaction possible much be “a win,” that every trade partner must “lose” the trade, and if such conditions don’t seem likely, don’t make it, regardless of how many moving parts there are and the unpredictability of player performance
  • And then there are people like me, crabby old fucks who have been following sports for a very long time, have recognized patterns and tendencies for the teams they follow, are mostly cynical and nihilistic about the likely realities about to befall their preferred teams, and the degrees and willingness to opine their opinions may vary

I used to not engage with rando-communities, but probably a combination of boredom, and that The Algorithm is spoon-feeding me content that pops enough synapses in my brain to drop random comments on various accounts, most of them being Braves communities where I occasionally wish to voice my displeasure with AJ Minter, Bryce Elder, and how the team would be best suited to sign the still-available Trevor Bauer, if he didn’t have this freakishly obviously collusion to blacklist him from the entire league over his head.

I don’t pay much concern over the reactions my words get, and I definitely don’t interact with other users beyond a laughing emoji at the response that are actually decent, but it’s really nothing different from any online community anywhere on the internet: people making wild trade scenarios, trade everything fans bickering with trade nothing fans, and so forth.

More recently, I decided to chime in to a few Braves communities, and I opined that the Braves aren’t doing to make any moves at all beyond a fourth outfielder-type and a relief pitcher; I figured the remark were just enough snarky without me having to blather on about how The Braves Way™ is that of crippling risk-aversion and hand-cuffing cheapness, which it totally is by the way.

And when the trade deadline lapsed, and the evening crossed midnight, where transactions that begun before the deadline needed to be finalized by, and all the smoke of the day’s activities had cleared up, the Atlanta Braves had made only one transaction-trading injured relief pitcher Tyler Matzek and minor league infielder Sabin Ceballos for:

Jorge Soler, outfielder
Luke Jackson, relief pitcher

At this point, all I could really do is shrug like Michael Jordan in the 1992 NBA Finals, after he drowned the Portland Trailblazers in a barrage of three-pointers as if to say, that was easy.  I’ve been following the Braves for a pretty long time now, and I’ve seen this song and dance before.  Save for a few exceptions throughout the years, the majority of the years, the Braves always seem convinced that the only things they ever need at the trade deadline is another outfielder and another relief pitcher, and that all other needs can be filled internally (cheaply) – That’s The Braves Way™!

In this season’s case, they’re not wrong that they needed some help on both accounts, but the fact of the matter is that the starting rotation has two gaping holes in it, and the team has been incapable of scoring runs the vast majority of the season. 

All around the league were decent talents from teams who were out of playoff contention and thrown in the towel, trying to improve their futures at the price of said decent talents available for trade.  And as the days ticked down to the trade deadline, they would come off the board, one by one, with the Phillies picking up Carlos Estevez from the Angels, the Yankees getting Jazz Chisholm, Jr. from the Marlins, the Dodgers getting Jack Flaherty from the Tigers, to name a few examples of front-running contenders actively trying to get even better for the stretch run.

And once again, the Braves sit on their hands all trade season long, and do nothing but pick up a fourth outfielder and a relief pitcher.  I’ve seen this rerun, many, many times in my life now.

For those keeping score, in spite of all the Braves’ many needs, the only outside acquisitions they’ve really made this season, was picking up Soler and Jackson, as well as a few weeks ago, picking up Eddie Rosario from the Washington Nationals’ literal trash after they had designated him for assignment.  Obviously, all of these guys were notable contributors to the 2021 World Series winnings squad, and it’s evident that the Braves’ front office is trying to challenge the intelligence of fans and supporters of the team by bringing back these nostalgia acts, as if they’re miraculously going to turn the team’s fortune around, three years later, older and used.

It goes without saying that the Braves have thrown in the towel on the year themselves, by their sheer lack of willingness to invest and improve.  Of course they will never admit it, but it seems pretty evident that they’re phoning in the roster on account of all the injuries that have decimated the roster, and probably thinking, we’ll just try again next season;  regardless of the fact that Max Fried is probably gone, as probably is Marcell Ozuna who is playing his ass off in a walk year, two of the most competent players on the current roster.

They’ll assume Chris Sale will reward their investment into his bounceback, Spencer Strider will recover to 110%.  That this season was not a fluke for Reynaldo Lopez, and that between Elder, Schwellenbach and Hurston Waldrep,* they can go back to the glory days of Maddux, Glavine and Smoltz.

*could these names get any whiter?

They’ll also assume Acuña and Harris will recover fully, Albies will get back to his All-Star form and Olson and Riley will bounce back.  Arcia might be the only guy on the hot seat, but I’m under the impression that Braves Corporate is already envisioning a fresh start in 2025 with all of their current assets in place, and that 2024 is already a lost cause, and any success to come from it would be considered a bonus.

At this point, it’s actually a bad thing for the Braves front office if the team does well enough to have a little playoff run, and then get bounced in the NLDS again.  Because then there will be all sorts of hindsight fire, criticism and accusations that the organization didn’t do enough to improve the team to where they might have pushed across the finish line for more success, instead of sputtering to another early playoff exit.

But if and when it happens, it’s not like it’s something that most older Braves fans haven’t seen before.  Such is, the curse of having knowledge sometimes.

Let’s talk about Avengers: Doomsday

So over the weekend, it was unveiled that part of phase 57 of the Marvel Cinematic Universe would be the release of an eventual film, Avengers: Doomsday, where the MCU would be introducing Doctor Doom, presumably to be the next big bad in the series.  But the biggest bombshell to come out of the announcement would be that Doctor Doom would be played by none other than, Robert Downey, Jr.

Now I didn’t see any of the internet outcrying or rage to have come from this, as I don’t pay an iota of attention to anything that isn’t fed to me these days, but I did notice people talking about what people are talking about, so I suppose that in segments of the world, there are people who are salty and disappointed with the notion of RDJ returning to the MCU after publicly declaring his departure from it after Avengers: Endgame.

I mean, I couldn’t care any less about RDJ picking up a second role in the MCU, so many people are quick to forget that Chris Evans was Johnny Storm before he became Captain America, and I’m sure there are several other lesser knowns who have picked up second roles at some point during the 27 years of Marvel movies in existence.  And with the MCU having already established the existence of the Multiverse, Pandora’s Box is wide open for whatever recasting, retconning and changes on the fly as they want.  Earth 6XX is just a digit change away from being able to re-write whatever the fuck Marvel Studios wants to write that will keep the money printer operating.

I’m sure that RDJ will portray Doom with justice, even though Doom is all about dignity and his own code of honor, while RDJ is best when he’s playing kind of an asshole, like Tony Stark was, but I’m still confident that he’ll knock it out of the park when all is said and done, and all the keyboard warriors who are complaining now will be surreptitiously STFU’d and cautiously singing his praises, while worrying about tryhards who keep screen grabs and e-receipts of dumb shit they might be saying now.

However, this isn’t to say that I don’t reaction to the announcement of Avengers: Doomsday without any trepidation myself.  In fact, I actually had to stop and think for a few seconds when I saw the name of the film, because when I hear the phrase “Doomsday,” in the context of comic books, my mind immediately goes to the big ass gray Kryptonian gorilla that killed Superman, which is a DC Comics IP and not Marvel.

Dr. Doom isn’t that far behind at this point, but the fact of the matter is that whenever I think about Dr. Doom in the context of Marvel Comics, to me, he’s a villain that I associate first and foremost with the Fantastic Four, and not the Avengers.  This isn’t to say that there’s not numerous instances in comic history where Doom has scrapped with the Avengers, but comic enthusiasts like me tend to forever mark a guy with whatever property they appeared first in, which in the case of Dr. Doom was Fantastic Four #5 in 1962.

But at least to me, it’s never going to not feel like Dr. Doom is being forced into the Avengers, because to me, he’s not an Avengers villain.  He is, and always will be a Fantastic Four big bad, and for that reason alone, it will permanently temper my ceiling of how good Doomsday can possibly be.

Although I’m sure the writers at the MCU will spin up a storyline that makes it feel organic and will be portrayed, acted and executed marvelously, I just don’t think of Dr. Doom as an Avengers adversary.  He’s the yang to Reed Richards’ yin, but an intellectual equal all the same.  Although he does some pretty extreme things that often results in death and destruction, Doom still has a strong sense of justice and integrity, and has more than once throughout history flipped sides for the greater good, and is one of those bad guys with honor, like Magneto, or even the Joker whenever anyone tries to hurt Batman that isn’t him.

That being said, I personally think that we’re approaching a crossroads for the MCU with Avengers: Doomsday, because ever since Endgame wrapped up phase whatever #5, the MCU has been stretching itself thinner and thinner and risking dilution, overexposure and burning out fans with the rapid releasing of so many spinoffs and trying to produce television and films all while trying to keep them somewhat tangenally connected for the sake of creating the next Infinity War.

Some may disagree and think we’ve already passed this point long ago, and some might think I’m nuts and there’s nothing wrong with the amount of exploding comic media still to come, but speaking for myself, I’m at a point where I’m becoming increasingly unable to keep up with every Marvel production released, and of the things that I have been able to see, not everything has really felt like it’s been worth the time investment.

Moon Knight sucked, Ms. Marvel, She-Hulk  and surprisingly Hawkeye were pretty decent.  I haven’t seen Echo, nor have I finished What If?  I haven’t seen The Marvels or The Eternals, but I’ve heard little but negative about them, and Black Widow was still a film that I didn’t think even needed to exist, save for the end credits scene. 

Tom Holland’s Spider-Man films are still quality, as are the animated Spider-Verse films, but they’re obviously still Sony’s properties first, no matter how badly the MCU wishes they weren’t.  But it’s evident that the MCU is really stretching thin with properties that aren’t X-Men and the reality that contains mutants in them, because we all know they’re sitting on this for phase-616 where they can try to reignite the comics movie craze all over again in the future.

The point of this recollecting of more recent MCU productions is to illustrate the picture that the MCU is kind of treading water in quality since Endgame, and I feel like the journey to Doomsday is going to be a critical one that will either cement the MCU as one of the greatest collaborative collections of media in history, or having fans be wishing for a merciful end to all this fucking comics-based media.

The return of RDJ might be seen as a panic move, or maybe the man just wanted to take a break from comics and go enjoy his Oscar for Oppenheimer, or perhaps this was all part of the plan.  I’m not going to assume that this journey to Doomsday will be bad, and will remain optimistic that RDJ and the MCU A-team can carry the torch back to an entertaining high road again, but at the same time, I wouldn’t be surprise if it doesn’t come with a lot more speed bumps, hiccups and some rougher patches than it did in the earlier phases.

I don’t think AEW knows what Unified means

As I was doom scrolling before going to sleep, I came across a video clip of Dustin Rhodes and what appeared to be two members of the Von Erich family, winning the Ring of Honor Six-Man Tag championships at some Ring of Honor show.  I wouldn’t know which one, because ever since Tony Khan bought the entire promotion, it hasn’t held my interest beyond the one Final Battle show I went to a few years ago, and fuck if I’m going to pay actual money to see a TK production.

The thing is, up until seeing this title change, I had no idea that the ROH Six-Man championship was still in existence.  I was under the impression that in an attempt to reduce the sheer volume of blets in AEW/ROH, that when the Bang Bang Gang* defeated The Acclaimed and “unified” the ROH Six-Man blets with the AEW Trios blets, six blets would be reduced to three.

*The amount of turrible that this name is, is unprecedented, and even in a carny, smarky bubble that AEW and their fans exist in, this stands out as that bad

Naturally, instead they ended up with nine total blets to cart around, as Jay White, Colten and Austin Gunn would lug around each an ROH Six-Man blet, the gaudy pink-strapped Acclaimed-version Trios blet, as well as the OG black, blue and gold AEW Trios blet.  There exists enough physical blets in AEW and ROH combined for every single talent that appears on screen to have one.

Anyway though, the whole point of a unified championship is the consolidate the number of titles, to increase the prestige of a singular championship, and despite the fact that there were at one point nine blets to signify the Unified Trios championship, the reality is that the Acclaimed-pink blets and the ROH Six-Man blets should have been taken off television.

Recently, whether it was legitimate or kayfabe, Jay White was injured, and taken off television; I’m hoping it was the latter, and that an injury angle is what was needed in order to break Jay White away from the Gunns and Juice Robinson, so that a guy that hasn’t been even a full year removed from being the IWGP World Champion can actually reset his trajectory in AEW, instead of being like Kazuchika Okada and being used at a fraction of his true capabilities and instead stashed with C-tier talents and meaningless television segments.

As a result of White being out, the Bang Bang Gang was stripped of the Unified Trios championship, and forced to fight The Patriarchy for the right to win them back.  And with their top worker out, Christian and his cronies would pick up the win, the titles, and hopefully he will elevate the Trios blets as well as he had elevated the TNT championship.

The thing is, what everyone failed to mention, and/or I was never made aware of because I don’t pay that much attention to AEW/ROH, is that the ROH Six-Man championship was un-unified just like that, and it wasn’t until I saw Dustin Rhodes and the Von Erichs winning them did I even learn that they were even active championships again.

Look, I’m fine with championships being resurrected when the need arises, but the thing with this convoluted journey of Six-Man/Trios championships is that it all happened within the span of a calendar year and basically ended up in the same place in which it started:

  • August 2023: The Acclaimed win the AEW Trios Championship
  • January 2024: Jay White and the Gunns win the ROH Six-Man Championship
  • April 2024: Bang Bang Gang defeats The Acclaimed, becomes the Unified Trios Champions
  • July 2024: On account of Jay White’s injury, Bang Bang Gang are stripped of the Unified Trios Championship; unmentioned, the unification is severed, and both sets of championships are rendered vacant
  • July 20, 2024: Christian and the Patriarchy win the AEW Trios Championship
  • July 27, 2024: Dustin Rhodes and the Von Erichs win the ROH Six-Man Championship

AEW/ROH doesn’t need 35 championship blets floating around, and yet they had the opportunity to pare down for the sake of the others, but instead they added more, and when they had a second chance to consolidate again, they only reduced out the custom-variants of the Acclaimed, and ended up with two different six-man titles in the end.

What all this amounts to is the sheer frivolity and unimportance of six-man tag team wrestling, if their championships are going to be monkeyed around with and passed around like a blunt at a rap concert. 

It’s funny, because the WWE often got flack for their dismissive attitude towards tag team wrestling, to the point where when AEW came into existence, they made it a high priority point to emphasize tag team wrestling, because of the Young Bucks and FTR.  But whereas the WWE shit on tag team wrestling, AEW apparently has decided to basically create a six-man tag division, so that they could have something to shit on as well.

KOREA VERSUS EVERYBODY

BBC: South Korea wrongly introduced as North Korea at the Paris Summer Olympics

If anyone has ever been curious to why I have a chip on my shoulder when it comes to the treatment of Koreans, this is a perfect example of why.  The bottom line is that my general opinion is that Korea; Korean culture, Korean contributions to the world, and Korean things in general; gets no respect from the rest of the fucking world.

Everything Japan does is admired and revered by the rest of the planet, and all UN countries are so scared of China’s population numbers and economic potential, that they all kowtow to them, as if they were the grasshoppers from A Bug’s Life, after the ants had uprisen against them.

Meanwhile, Korea has historically been an exemplary ally to the UN, the United States and many other countries.  They haven’t enslaved or bombed anyone, they’re not always lurking in the shadows installing sleepers all around the globe to spy and disrupt.  Korean economy is stable, prosperous, and other than the fact that everyone is black haired and narrow eyed, Korean society really is a lot like American culture.

Yet, people can’t even put down Asian people without disregarding Koreans, like when racists mock Asian people, asking them if they’re Chinese or Japanese.  Saying any other country much less Korea usually results in the person asking having to grind gears in their brains to process the existence of any other Asian race, but the fact that Korea is lumped into that denigrating B-tier of Asian countries fills me up with piss and vinegar.

Just in general, Korea is overlooked and not shown the respect that I think that the entire fucking culture is worthy of.  It doesn’t matter how many global industries Koreans dominate, how competent and good at athletics or competitive events they become, because we’re not Chinese or Japanese, the rest of the world tends to gloss over us, and it leaves me feeling disgusted with the entire world whenever shit like this occurs.

I mean seriously, the fucking Olympics?  The announcers had one goddamn job to do, which was to just name countries, and they can’t even get the Koreas correct?  You know they have rehearsals and practices for putting on monumentally things like this, and yet on global television, they still manage to bungle it the fuck up and mistake the Koreas.

The thing is in America, there have been numerous announcers, news anchors and commentators who have been shitcanned getting caught on a hot mic saying things that were either flagrantly racist or perceived to be racist, primarily to black people.  I would, seriously and as objective as I could try to be, put this up there with that kind of mistake, and if I were the superiors to the both English and French announcers, consider dismissal for both of these ignorant fucks for one, not knowing their world geography for the fucking Olympics, and two, being a colossal embarrassment to the entire International Olympic Committee.

But seeing as the only party being denigrated by their mistake was “just” Koreans, I don’t really see much retribution occurring.  Twitter apologies are not sufficient, and on behalf of Koreans worldwide, I do not accept it.  It’s insulting and embarrassing, and Koreans deserve better than this.

I hope this slight lights a fire under the asses of the 159 Korean Olympians, North and South, and they squeeze out a few extra medal wins here and there out of vindictive spite alone.  Not that it would really matter or be noticed, since the only countries that ever really get any spotlight at every Olympics is the US, China, Japan, Russia and whatever host country.

But whatever, fuck it.  It’s just another day at the office for Korea versus Everybody.

I hope Southwest is ready to be mediocre

WaPo: Southwest Airlines eliminating open seating starting in 2025

In the grand spectrum of things, Southwest Airlines getting rid of open seating doesn’t really impact my life that much.  I don’t fly enough anymore to really be affected by this, because my life is too hectic at this juncture in my life and when it’s time for a family trip, driving is more economical and logical albeit more time consuming, but it’s better than dropping $2,100 on a trip to like Orlando.

But Southwest was always a company that I had some admiration for, because their general people-first modus operandi was always refreshing in the vast ocean of big businesses that existed solely to part dollars from the hands of the people and put them into the pockets of soulless shitheads known as investors and other finance-ey words used to describe old white people. 

And it’s not like they were starving by any stretch of the imagination, even during some of the most brutal recessions and stretches of financial wastelands, SWA was one of the few airlines that continually turned profits, mostly on account of their generally friendly business practices.

Reasonable fares, convenient routes, free checked bags, and free change policies; there was a lot to like about SWA, but if there was ever one thing that conversely blew the minds off of the dull-watted, and to some probably perceived as a deterrent and turn-off, was the open-seating policy that probably defeated more people than the internet itself.

Personally, it was, and has never been an issue for me, because I have a brain.  It’s not that hard to queue up in lines in little chunks of five behind clearly marked totems, and it takes either a little bit of upfront discipline or the willingness to pay a little extra to get Group A boarding, and seeing as how the vast majority of my travels on SWA have usually been by myself, I’ve almost always been able to grab an errant single aisle or window seat closer to the front of the aircraft, meaning I can get the fuck off sooner rather than later being wedged into the back of the aircraft and needing an extra 20 minutes just to deplane.

But if I had to guess, in spite of being their policy for over the last 50 years, SWA has simply had enough of the bullshit of dealing with passengers who just haven’t gotten it after a half century, passengers who conduct themselves like entitled spoiled assholes on the aircraft, and having to deal with passengers who they have to reimburse or give free second seats to because they’re the sizes of Pontiac Azteks.

Like the vast majority of things in the world that end up being declared ruined, there’s nobody really to blame, except people.

Sure, at the root of it, I want to accuse some managerial change at the higher rungs of the ladders at SWA, where some bean counters have identified a vast field of earning opportunities to be had by ditching open seating, and that’s probably not inaccurate, but the company had resisted many opportunities to switch in previous decades, but in this day and age, the bullshit of passengers has probably grown too much, their workforce has grown flakier and full of impatient younger heads, and enough is enough and this is where we’re headed.

The reality is that SWA has probably lost out on millions over the last few decades, by trying to be The People’s™ airline, with their friendly policies and acceptance and inclusion, and thanks to mounting passenger bullshit, they’ve probably just hit a philosophical wall of why they should be handicapping their earning capabilities being nice to a ton of assholes, when absolutely nobody else is doing it?

When the day is over, as I said, it doesn’t impact me a whole hell of a lot, but I would be curious to see what lies in the future for Southwest.  I don’t imagine the loss of open-seating is really going to impact the airline as much as many outlets on the internet make it sound like it’s going to, but for those people who were married to the concept, and are going to revolt, or at least no longer prioritize them because they’re basically transforming into an “ordinary” airline on the level of United or American or JetBlue, SWA is just going to likely blend into the pack, except, barring a change, more handicapped by virtue of not partnering up with travel aggregators like Google, Kayak, Travelocity and Expedia.

Their free baggage and lack of change fees might be enough to retain some customers, and I’m really curious to know what’s going to become of the large passenger policy once seats become assigned, and big people won’t be able to just lumber to the gate and assume an empty seat will be available next to theirs, but in the game of airline thrones, the most important thing is solely going to hinge on if as long as SWA can remain competitive with fares.

Regardless, I still lament over the days before SWA engulfed AirTran.  Not a travel day goes by where I don’t miss AirTran and the time where I could get sub-$200 RT fares to visit my family and eastern-based friends, and then cash in my credits to trips to Las Vegas or Seattle.  After the merger, all those routes have nearly doubled in cost, and despite my general positive opinion of their brand, I was not happy about it.

Things change, this is where we’re headed, and I hope SWA is ready to slide into the middle of the pack.  But as long as they don’t have to see any further videos and articles about their passengers being douchebag pricks on the internet, they probably are happy to take that deal in the long game.