Tag: crime

$100k worth of noodles, 250 billion grams of sodium

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Pretty sure the container was more valuable than the cargo: truck containing allegedly $100,000 worth of ramen noodles stolen from rural Georgia gas station overnight parking

I know the article states that it was a semi-truck, but I have a hard time believing that something the size of a semi could actually contain $100k worth of ramen noodles.  Especially if they were actually like the cheap shit Maru-chan noodles that are like 10¢ a package, but the article doesn’t actually specify the brand of noodles taken.

Instead, I imagine that the only thing remotely capable of hauling $100k worth of ramen noodles would have to be one of those land train trucks that’s basically a semi hauling 3-4 cargo containers in succession, like the one in Fast & Furious 4 that Vin Diesel stole one of the tankers of gas from.  Maybe, only maybe, would a truck hauling four containers worth of ramen noodles actually amount to close to $100k.

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A show about deathbed confessions would be straight $$$

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This is a concept that I’ve thought in my head many times as being something that would be absolutely fascinating to watch, but it came back into the forefront again upon seeing the president of the United States basically turn his back on the United States while kowtowing to the president of the Russian federation.  Because this is one of those stories in which we the people will never hear the truth about until the people directly involved in it are on their deathbeds, and are more willing to disclose truths because they’re on their way out anyway.

And if this were a television show, I have no doubt in my mind that it would probably be the most compelling and fascinating show in history, hearing notable people throughout history spilling the beans on all sorts of undisclosed information, with no concerns for consequence or repercussions because they’ll be dead soon anyway.

From politicians to actors, athletes and other prominent figures, don’t tell me that people aren’t curious about the things that have happened in the lives of some of these people that they wouldn’t be interested in hearing about.

Why is Donald Trump so deferent to Vladimir Putin? Did Kobe Bryant actually rape that girl in Colorado? Did OJ Simpson do it? What did Bill Murray whisper to Scarlett Johansson in Lost in Translation? Did Bill Cosby really drug and sexually assault all those women?

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Not sure if this is a good thing to disclose or not

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Long story short: City of South Fulton Renaissance Wakanda City of South Fulton’s entire law enforcement division led entirely by African-American women; publicly acknowledged as “black girl magic”

Yeah, if I were still living in South Fulton county, I’d be happier if the law enforcement arm they weren’t doing photoshoots and were actually doing some work.  I’m not entirely sure this is such a great story to break currently, because for those who don’t really follow what’s going down in the City of South Fulton, the whole place is kind of in shambles, infrastructure wise.

The fact that they can’t even land on a name for the city goes to show just how disorganized and lacking in structure the whole place is in general, but the law enforcement is a whole other story.  Seldom does a day goes by where the front page of the AJC doesn’t have some sort of story that contains the words “shooting,” “killed,” “crime,” “South Fulton,” or any combination of them on it, because the crime is that out of control down there and continuously getting worse.

It’s the primary reason why I sold my house and moved away, and not a day goes by whenever I see a crime story emerging from down there, that I’m so glad to have gotten out of there when I did, even if it meant taking a loss on the house and going through a little bit of separation anxiety of parting ways with my first owned home, even if it was in a rapidly deteriorating area.

And as I’ve said numerous times, I’m still subscribed to the Nextdoor community online for my old neighborhood, because it’s giving me constant reminders and daily insight to just how much South Fulton is continuing to spiral downward.  I can see first-hand from people that still live there just how much they’re frustrated and exasperated with the escalating crime problems down there, and this is exactly why I’m not the least impressed by articles about how South Fulton’s law enforcement is helmed entirely by African-American women.

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Pokémon is what makes it funny

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Newsworthy: parkour hero scales four stories in like four seconds in order to rescue child hanging off of a ledge in Paris.  French president applauds his act of heroism and immediately expedites his pursuit of French citizenship and immediately offers him a job with the Paris fire brigade.  A wonderful story of bravery and a reward fitting of a hero who deserves it.

Brogworthy: child ended up in the precarious situation because his dad left him unsupervised so he could go to the market and play Pokémon Go on the way back.  Dad faces two years in prison for child neglect.  Because of Pokémon Go.

Even before it was revealed that dad was out being an idiot, this was still a fantastic story of a legitimate hero who did something extraordinary.  It’s a happy ending for all, because the kid didn’t fall to his death, and the Malian immigrant who scaled the building like Spider-Man to rescue the kid is instantly rewarded with the French citizenship he was aspiring to gain. 

There’s not much to talk about in a situation like this, and it’s easiest to simply marvel in the incredible feats of human bravery and feel like our collective faith in people can gain a point or two for such selfless courage.

But then it comes out that the kid was left unsupervised by a deadbeat of a father who went out to the market, and then decided to leisurely take his time coming back so that he could play some Pokémon Go.  Now, it’s something to brog about.

Full disclosure: I still play Pokémon Go.  It’s literally taking me an entire year to go from level 34 to 35, and there’s a litany of life milestones that I’m fairly confident that I’ll hit before I can get to the maximum level 40, and knowing my luck, Niantic, if they’re even still around in six years, will raise the max cap to like 50, and then I’ll be fucked and proclaim I’ll stop but then probably won’t anyway.

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Now that’s some hardcore ownage

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Applause for draconian punishment: dumbass teenager who threw a firework that resulted in a gargantuan forest fire sentenced to pay $36 million dollars in restitution

Step aside, Smokey.  You ain’t done SHIT in 64 years.  Kids have continued to play with fire and idiots have continued to inadvertently start fires that have resulted in god knows how much damage and carnage to nature throughout the last century.

But Hood River County Circuit Judge John A. Olson sentencing a 15-year old to pay $36 million dollars in restitution?  Now THAT’S going to make some dumbasses think twice on whether or not it’s worth playing with fire and risk starting a blaze and getting caught and facing the gavel themselves.

I really love this story, because far too often, America has seen people who have done terrible things get away with merely metaphorical slaps on the wrists.  Draconian punishments would undoubtedly make people think twice or three or four times on whether or not a bad choice is worth the punishment, and if only America would go a little dark side and apply more of them, then maybe this country wouldn’t be so full of shitheads.

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Sound logic

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Atlanta rapper encourages people to use paintballs instead of actual bullets, if one must satiate the need to shoot firearms.  The message was seemingly intended to curb violence; except when some dickheads unleashed a torrent of paintballs on a bunch of people at a public gas station, one enraged 15-year old fired back – with a real firearm.  And of course, a toddler was inadvertently struck and killed in the completely unnecessary and preventable fracas, and so now a child is dead and a teenager is in all likelihood going to prison for a long time and the people shooting paintballs who started the whole incident are nowhere to be found.

Hashtag Atlanta not the TV show

It’s a little difficult who really should be responsible for the root of this whole incident.  On one hand, we have some c-list rapper using his social media reach to even put the wise idea into the heads of little impressionable wannabe thugs that shooting guns is okay as long as it’s with paintballs and not actual bullets.  On the other hand, the dumbasses he influences aren’t really his responsibility, and he’s not the one who fired at actual people, since his own genius video documentation of him vandalizing things were usually inanimate objects.

I think the seeds to why I felt like writing about it is simply the fallacy of the intention of suggesting paintballs over bullets; which is basically why shoot anything at all?  In what world outside of the Middle East are people afflicted with the urge to need to shoot shit to where a suggestion of paintballs over bullets would even be made in the first place?  Look, I know coming from America there’s a lot of irony in that statement, but still, there’s something seriously wrong with the idea of if you must shoot guns is even a perceived thing in the first place.

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Too distracted to enforce the distracted

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Georgia Senate approves House Bill 673*, outlawing motorists from holding their cell phones while operating a vehicle AKA the stop fucking texting while driving bill.

*behind paywall, but just hit the stop loading button before the paywall script popup has a chance to load to read content anyway because fuck myAJC

That’s great and all, but it’s going to be completely meaningless when no cop in the state is going to bother enforcing this law.  Unless they’re extremely bored and want to do work to pass the time and/or they’re targeting minorities.  One of my best friends works in law enforcement, and every time I have questions about “is X illegal?” the answers are almost always yes, but with a disclaimer that it’s basically discretionary on the officer to whether or not it’s worth the effort to tie themselves up with menial violations when there are bigger fish to potentially fry.

And considering Georgia’s lax discretionary ambivalence about HOV lane violators, blackout license plate covers, jaywalking, and other seemingly innocuously negligible yet illegal misdemeanors, HB 673 seems destined to be as useless as most of these other laws, because if nobody’s going to bother enforcing it, what’s really the point?

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