#TRYHARDSZN2025: This, is going to be my favorite story this #SZN

Trent Crimm, the Independent: braggadocious teen mogul goes viral after being rejected by nearly all applied colleges, in spite of monumental qualifications

I’m just going to go out on a limb here and say that I don’t think any story for the rest of the #SZN is going to top this one.  Sure, the #TRYHARD only applied to 18 schools, but he was rejected by 15 of them, despite having incredible qualifications as far as grades, accomplishments and frankly, life experiences went.

What we have here, is probably one of the greatest examples in history of how the wrong attitude and approach can absolutely shitcan your chances of acceptance in the real world, because if you were to take the time to read this article and read his college essay, that he thinks he’s so important as to call his personal statement, it becomes absolutely crystal clear to why this he was rejected by nearly every school he applied to, despite having excellent grades, tests well, and the intelligence and savvy to become a young entrepreneur of a successful and profitable app.

Many have already pointed out and dissected all of the numerous reasons to why this #TRYHARD was shot down in such embarrassingly overwhelming fashion, but it really boils down to the fact that his college essay absolutely turned off just about every single recruiter with any pull or power to accept.

He basically shits on the whole notion of going to college, proclaims he had no intention of going to college, and sees college as simply ‘a rite of passage’ for teenagers growing up.  Absolutely no college in America would want to admit some kid who has no real aspirations once they’re in the door, and comes off as a massive flight-risk of dropping out, because he already has success and earning potential in his life right now.

It feels like he’s watched too many rite of passage movies, where plots of claimed that in order to stand out in the college application process, one has to be bold, take chances, and tell an incredible story.  As insufferably braggadocious his essay is, it’s extremely well written, reads well and tells a story, but the fact of the matter is that real life isn’t a movie, and there’s a level of vanilla, boring decorum that is expected, and frankly required, when doing things like applying to colleges or jobs. 

Proclaiming your disinterest for college and then bragging about all the reasons why you feel that way before saying “but oh wait, college is a rite of passage so I guess I should do it” wasn’t the right choice, and I’m honestly more flabbergasted at the fact that this #TRYHARD didn’t have anyone in his life to give him the guidance or advice that, yo, maybe this essay isn’t the right approach. 

I got the vibe that this kid has probably been raised with little emperor syndrome, which is pretty common in lots of Chinese and Middle Eastern cultures, where the first born son is basically invincible from criticism and coddled and sheltered from real world scenarios, and if he even sought any guidance about his essay, was probably told it was great and to run with it.  Oops.

What’s funnier is the fact that this #TRYHARD took his beef to the internet, with the implication being that he genuinely thought the collective internet would really be on his side once he made his story public.  As tone-deaf and clearly blind to understanding how the college application process works, he’s clearly as clueless to how the internet works, and in no time flat, he’s been dismantled, dissected and picked apart by the internet, with as much success finding people who sympathize with him as he was accepted into schools.

On a side note, yeah the #TRYHARD biffed on all of the Ivies he tried to get into, but kind of a low-blow by the Independent to throw shade at the schools he did get into, calling Georgia Tech, the U and Texas “less prestigious” schools.  I mean, they are less prestigious schools as far as not being Ivy League, but they’re all solid educational institutions, with excellent specific programs, and all flush with cash on account of robust athletic programs.  And they all clearly were capable of looking past his shit attitude and see the potential, and gave him the green light, when better or equally qualified applicants probably didn’t.

I know I take shots at Georgia Tech all the time, but there’s no denying the school is among the top engineering schools in the country, and it might have the name value of MIT, but it’s no slouch as far as its educational credentials are concerned.

Frankly, #TRYHARD here has two options – forego college like he believed he was destined to do, focus on his app and ecommerce acumen, and follow the path of Zuck and become wealth and something without a college degree.  Or, attend Georgia Tech and get an excellent education, go to Texas and soak in the college sport and immersive college atmosphere, or go to the U, where he’d be living in Miami and lean into Miami living.

As owned as he might have been in the college applications game, and on the internet, he’s still in a very enviable position overall.  He has acceptances to some “less prestigious” but reputable schools, basically his own business, and he’s still just 18 years old.  There’s a tremendous time for him to learn and grow and grow the fuck up, and this would be a critical year and good basis for him to punt on 2025, take a gap year and try again the next year, and find some humility and perhaps use this experience as a means to write an essay that’s not quite so insufferable as much as demonstrating the experience of being humbled and growing from it.

Either way, who doesn’t love a good story of some dumbass getting owned?  And even better that it falls within the realm of #TRYHARDSZN, and ultimately is an opposite-story of instead of some #TRYHARD getting into 155 schools and amassing millions in cumulative scholarship offers, it’s someone who got rejected by a bunch of schools, and entirely because of his own stupidity.

#TRYHARDSZN2025: Good effort, but not enough trying hard

11AliveOnMySide: Fairburn, Georgia teen accepted into 53 colleges with $1.5M in scholarships earned

After writing about the chica that notched 155 acceptances and $6M in scholarships, #TRYHARDs like this one just seem so pale in comparison to write about.  Which really sucks for them, because being a student with a 4.0 GPA and hoovering up 50+ college acceptances really is something to be proud of, but I guess this is what happens when #TRYHARD culture has become the thing it’s become, and gives a glimpse to why #TRYHARDs #TRYHARD.

As important as education is, to those in the #TRYHARDing game, attention and notoriety seems to matter just a little bit more.  What with all the insufferable humblebragging, the photoshoots and general look-at-me behavior by all those that #TRYHARD, it’s apparent that the actual education at the end of the journey is secondary to the two seconds of internet notoriety that comes with being the best of the best when it comes to #TRYHARDing and accumulating as many college acceptances as possible while more than likely, not having to pay a cent in application fees.

Which is a shame, because a lot of the stories of the people who become #TRYHARDs are really fascinating and inspiring up until the point where they decide to do what they do because they want the attention.  Like this one chica from close to where I used to live, which was a pretty desolate wasteland back then, and is seemingly worse now, has still managed to emerge from the muck and be a student with a 4.0 GPA, volleyball player, and somehow has the tenacity to be working two jobs, really is the embodiment of hard work.

But at some point in her journey, it was decided to become a #TRYHARD, and the question becomes if the grades, the extracurriculars, and the jobs, are they for the purpose of building character and necessity, or are they the purpose for padding a personal resume to feed into the next stage of life to where additional #TRYHARDing is all that life is going to be until they’re anonymous adults who hate their lives and wonder what their formative teenage years went.

I can’t remember who said it between Larry Bird and Magic Johnson, but one of them had a story about when they were young and in high school, and they were being touted as future megastars and can’t-miss prospects, they were reminded that as great as they think they were, inevitably there would always be someone out there who was working harder, and was probably better than you were.  And as inevitable as greatness finding greatness is, Bird and Magic eventually encountered each other at the college ranks, a rivalry was born, carrying into the NBA, and the debate still lives on whom of the two was the better player.

And as impressive as 53 and $1.5M should be, in the grand spectrum of things, just up the street from where this #TRYHARD was doing her thing, she probably wasn’t aware of a queen bee #TRYHARDingn way harder than she was en route to her 155 and $6M.  And there is no debate on whom of the two was the bigger #TRYHARD.

As I said before, it’s going to be a real hard act to follow, and I almost don’t want to waste my time writing about lesser #TRYHARDs unless a real noteworthy #TRYHARD comes along, but we’ll see how time permits in the coming months of #TRYHARDSZN2025.

#TRYHARDSZN2025: Imagine if UGA were your dream school

Lowered expectations: Georgia teen accepted to 60 different schools, amassing $1.3M in cumulative scholarship offers

Another day, another Georgia-based #TRYHARD.  I’m seriously wondering if it’s an IP thing or something or if the vast majority of the #TRYHARDs in the country are all coincidentally just coming out of Georgia, but every single edition of #TRYHARDSZN2025 so far have all been from Georgia.  I doubt that such is going to be a case throughout the whole #SZN, but it is a little head-scratching from the onset.

Anyway, if I had 60 acceptances when I was this kid’s age, I undoubtedly would have had the criteria of being how far away from home, and how much scholarship money are they going to float me, and the best combination of distance from Northern Virginia and how much they’d scholarship me, would be the strongest contenders.

Such, is not the case for this guy, whom although they don’t disclose any of the 60 acceptances he received, the State of Georgia doesn’t have that many colleges and universities in it to constitute close to 60, so I have to imagine that a lot of ideal and acceptable out-of-state, far the fuck away from bumfuck Dublin, Georgia are being left on the table by deciding to go to his dream college of, the University of Georgia.

This reminds me of Terry Jerry-Larry-Garry Gergich from Parks & Rec and how him and his family’s annual vacation was to their favorite place in the world, Muncie, Indiana, which was presumably not that far from fictional Pawnee, Indiana.

Like, the boy has the opportunity to get the fuck out of Georgia, but instead he’s taking his golden tickets and just going two hours north, up to Athens, where his supposed dream school is.

Don’t get me wrong, UGA is a solid school, reputable and moderately respected in the world, but the boy wants to go down a pre-med track, and I’m hard-pressed to believe that UGA is the most qualified school to go to for a guy who’s interested in biology and pre-med.  Just in the SEC, I know that Auburn is a better school for such things, but I can’t imagine the level of education and awareness of the world outside of Laurens County is particularly high.

Either way, I’m already getting tired of writing about #TRYHARDs from Georgia with fairly mediocre numbers in the inevitable grand spectrum of #TRYHARDSZN, so good on this one guy for 60 acceptances and $1M in scholarships, and getting to go to his dream school right up the road, but when the dust settles, there’s already bigger #TRYHARDs and bigger dreams being chased by much bigger overachievers.

If this were my Korean family, I’d jump out a window

FOX26: 17-year, 8 month girl passes the California bar exam, breaking the record for youngest person to do so, previously held by, her brother, besting him by three months

Originally, this was just going to be a fairly predictable, forgettable post about how tryhard these Korean teenagers are, how they propagate Korean stereotypes and make it harder for the rest of the Koreans on the planet that don’t want to be doctor or lawyer and have to go to Harvard or Yale, but then I found this specific article that did a little bit of a dive into their entire family, and then the whole thing kind of turned into a horror story that makes me feel all triggered and grateful that this wasn’t my life growing up.

But when I found out about these tryhard teens who both passed the California bar at the age of 17, my first thought was that man, I certainly hope they don’t have any younger siblings, because the bar set by their asshole elder siblings is going to be one hell of a lofty goal to aspire to best.  And then I found this article that goes in depth to their entire family and not only is there one younger sibling, there’s actually two more kids in line behind the brother and sister who passed the bar at 17.

My next thought was that man, life is going to suck for the two of those younger siblings.

Turns out that the 14-year old next in line, is already in her second year of law school.  I don’t know how long law school goes, but I’m going to imagine that she’s probably going to do whatever it takes in order to take the bar exam when she’s like 16 years old, and will probably kill herself if she fails to best her nuna.

But if she succeeds?  Man, it’s going to suck to be the baby of this family, who’s just eight years old now, but will probably have to pass the bar at 15 in order to keep up with the escalating expectations that his asshole siblings keep heaping onto him.  But the little nerd has already declared his intention of being an attorney as well, to the point where he’s dressing up as a little Korean Carlton Banks, pretending to be an attorney already.

Man though, the thought of if this was my own Korean family growing up, just makes want to go all Tommen Baratheon if I were the baby of this family and not of my own.

The best part is that neither of the parents aren’t even lawyers either; appa is a patent clerk, and umma is a baking teacher, and apparently the two of them somehow had House Hunters finances to embark on having four fucking kids. 

I can’t imagine the old-world Korean pressures that they put on their kids to the point where they not only managed to get not just one, not just two, but three and potentially all four kids to actually want to become full-ass lawyers.  Lord knows my parents and probably countless Korean parents across America would love to invent a time machine to go to the future, abduct these parents to bring them back to their children’s childhoods and learn how to brainwash them into wanting to become lawyers themselves.

This family sounds like they have to be the biggest squares on the fucking planet, giving Koreans a sad name of being so overachieving and so tryhard.  I imagine family dinners must be a real hoot, with a whole bunch of lawyers around the table, and when they get together with extended family, I’m sure all the cousins and aunts and uncles are real thrilled when they roll in luxury cars that budding lawyer salaries are financing, full of tryhards ready to argue and rebut and well actually everything anyone says.

Sure, they will inevitably make a ton of money if they all climb the lawyer ladders they’re aspiring to climb, but all the same I have no other envy for them.  I’m sure their life is nothing like Suits, is tremendously more boring, and that these nerds probably have even less hobbies than a drowning dad like me.

The hardest part of every day

Is trying to suppress how difficult life is in conversation, because if I were to be too honest about it, I would come off as curmudgeon and probably seen as overly cynical when I’m just being honest, and then such would become my reputation if it already isn’t at this point, and because perception is reality, everyone around me would tread even lighter than they already do to the point where I would become alienated more than I already feel like I am.

Because if I were to explain that I wake up every single day of the week at 6:40 in order to be ahead of the kids as far as breakfast and preparation for the day goes and the only time I ever get a breather is when my mother-in-law visits or I’m physically out of pocket, that might sound kind of rough, to almost never get a breather or opportunity to sleep in, ever.

I love my kids, but they’re at an age where everything is a fight, everything is a power struggle, they’re going to bed later than they’ve ever gone before, and by the time they’re in bed, I’m usually already hangry and frustrated at the fact that I will now have maybe two, three hours if I’m willing to stay up on the later end, to actually not be a dad, which is a paltry amount of time to accomplish really anything, as if I had any hobbies left at this juncture of my life.

But first I have to reset the house for the next day of kid carnage, and the vast majority of the time it’s just me that’s doing any of it, adding to my daily frustration level.  I do the dishes, pack the kids’ lunches, pack my own lunch, generally tidy up what needs to be tidied up, and by the time I’m done with everything, I’ll maybe have an hour before I should really be thinking about going to bed in order for this song and dance to repeat the next day.

Yeah, my life really isn’t something that I imagine anyone would envy, other than the love I have and get from my beautiful kids, and along with the aforementioned struggles above, is the fact that I feel like I’m trapped inside a bubble of being incapable of expressing myself, other than a brog nobody reads which is the closest thing to an outlet I have it feels like a lot of the time.  I don’t feel capable of being able to unload with my family or friends and I definitely wouldn’t entertain the thought of opening up to colleagues.

But it’s fucked up that I feel it’s better to be disingenuous rather than entirely honest, because honesty would hit like a sledgehammer, and I just don’t think people are tough enough to be able to handle it.  I already feel like an island most of my life, which is absolutely frightening because the last person I want to be like is my island of a dad, but I just don’t think there’s anybody who could take the truth without it blowing up in some way shape or form.

Someone put Miguel Vargas on (career) suicide watch

No matter how much the Braves stink it up sometimes, and even if they miss the playoffs due to Bryce Elder, their feast or famine inept offense, and their complete lack of willingness to improve at the trade deadline or by signing Trevor Bauer, fewer things will be sadder than this image of now-White Sox infielder, Miguel Vargas, staring off into the abyss after the White Sox had lost their 20th consecutive baseball game.

A little over a week ago, Vargas was suiting up for the first in the NL West Dodgers, probably living his best life.  As being part of a Major League roster, his paychecks were probably getting nice and thick, and the team is so loaded with talent, that he was mostly a backup player anyway, living the American dream of sitting on a bench for the vast majority of every game, and at the most, getting a pinch-hit or pinch-run opportunity, or a Sunday start.  Life in LaLa-Land was beautiful and sunny, and even if his minor league performance hadn’t yet caught up to the bigs, he had made it.

But then Vargas was traded to the Chicago White Sox; not just the worst team in the AL Central, they’re the worst team in all of baseball, and they were riding a lengthy losing streak, that had no light at the end of the tunnel of stopping.  Aside from the trade that brough him to Chicago, anyone who had any inkling of a chance at stopping the bleeding were also getting shipped out, and the White Sox were undoubtedly raising the white flag on the season, and the organization’s only objective was to be able to field a team for the remainder of the games of the season, all while attempting to restore their farm system with assets and prospects from other teams via trade.

Originally, my knee-jerk reaction was that Vargas should suck it up and take solace in the fact that he’s still a major league player on a big league roster.  He’s still getting paid major league money to play a kids game, and being moved to a team like the White Sox, should alleviate pretty much all pressure there could be to succeed, because the team has no pressure to actually win games; and it’s in these conditions where a guy like Miguel Vargas could flourish and raise his stock, and either get paid, or possibly get traded again, after the season, and escape from the Southside.

However, apparently Miguel Vargas is at a precariously early stage of his career that he kind of has a reason to be depressed and mopey over his situation.  Being a pre-arbitration player, he’s making league minimum, which is still a ridiculous $775K to play baseball, it’s low enough to where he becomes a negligible risk of getting cut like a rounding error.  And if his performance doesn’t show some improvement soon, the two prospects sent to Chicago with him also play the same positions he do, and they could very well leapfrog over him in the organizational hierarchy.

Above all else, he goes from sunny beautiful Los Angeles to the south side of Chicago.  I don’t even know what their park is called nowadays, but I can’t imagine it’s improved at all from when it was The Cell™ AKA the worst ballpark in all of MLB in my own experiences.  Sure, I’d wager that he’s not actually living on the south end of the city, but he still has to commute there for all his home games, and the Southside really is as shitty as it’s made to look in Shameless

I’d be on the precipice of a breakdown if I were Miguel Vargas too, but at least there’s one possible silver lining to everything he’s going through – if the Dodgers actually do manage to not fuck up in the playoffs and miraculously win the World Series, then he is due a World Series ring too, because baseball is funny like that and even the slimmest of contributors get a share in the credit of a championship.

Either way, when I had the idea to write about Miguel Vargas, I originally thought along the lines of suck it up, buttercup, but then diving deeper into his financials and his performance statistics, I began to realize that he really did have a reason to be this sad, and that in itself is really sad, because professional athletes shouldn’t ever be sad, unless they’re losing critical championship-implication games, not some random August regular season scrap against another pitiful franchise like the A’s.

#TRYHARDSZN2024: I’m surprised she’s alive to TRYHARD

Honestly it’s hard to stay motivated to keep writing about all these #TRYHARDs after covering someone who was accepted into 231 schools before picking a random low-tier school, but the show must go on until the clock hits zero: 16-year old Louisiana girl accepted into 60 colleges, presumably graduating early in order to start college

By now, after writing about 20 of these insufferable #TRYHARDs, I’m kind of having some regret for taking this pointless exercise on, but at the same time, it’s something that keeps me writing even when I don’t want to write about it, and for someone who takes pride in sticking with it, there are worse things to complain about, like my life in general but anyway.

It’s obvious that so many people embark on the path of being a #TRYHARD because it brings them attention and they really like attention, but this particular one seems to have gotten bit by the attention bug at an early age, based on this specific quote from the article:

Poullard has also gone viral as a child, when she met former president Barack Obama.

“Still to this day I don’t realize how hard it is to meet the president,” Poullard said. “My daddy told me before we walked in that White House. He’s like ‘When you see the president run up to him and I bet you’ll go viral’. It’s been like 11 years. I just think that’s so crazy.”

It’s almost like daddy wanted his daughter to get gunned down or something, instructing his child to fucking run at the President of the United States.  But clearly the country under Obama probably made it just a hair safer for a five-year old black kid to run at the POTUS, and I didn’t care enough to dig deeper on the claim that she was viral as a kid and being noticed by the internet now for being a #TRYHARD, but it’s evident that the things this 16-year old has done in her life has probably mostly been done in the name of getting attention.

But another telling quote that I found amusing were her so called words of wisdom to those who would also wish to embark on the attention-seeking path of #TRYHARDing:

Just because you don’t have a high A-C-T score or your grades might not be that good, you can still apply to that school if you want to,” Poullard said. “I guarantee you when you have a long list of community services that you’ve done, that’s going to say a lot about you as a person.”

So the takeaway I get from this is that despite being a mediocre student, as long as you don’t set your goals too high, you can still apply to a boatload of schools and get accepted into a lot of them, and as long as you don’t give specifics to the schools you’re applying to, you can still boast that you got into 60 of them and sound like a genius scholar.

I will say though, it must not have been entirely too mediocre, because the reveal at the end is that she’s staying local, and will be going to LSU.  As far as I’m concerned, LSU is one of the better known schools that has collected a #TRYHARD, but I also know them primarily for athletics and know nothing about them academically.  I do know though, that LSU is a school that does party real hard, and has some rough partying culture, and if I’m a parent, I’m definitely sweating sending my 16-year old daughter away to LSU.

For a kid that has been speedrunning life to get to college at the age of 16, there are some harsh, hard realities that are going to come into play once you’re away from home at college, and I hope they’ve learned enough street smarts and have enough maturity to survive college, and rush to become a miserable adult sooner rather than later.