Tag: tryharding

#TRYHARDSZN2024: Catching unicorns

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Avdohnk: Teen from Modesto, California goes 21 for 34 in college applications, including four of the Ivies

Seeing as how the general culmination of #TRYHARDSZN acceptance days are now in the past, all that’s really left is to just scour the landscape of the world, searching for #TRYHARDs who are standouts in a very competitive field.  In other words, schools and the news are mostly looking for kids that can help fill their Affirmative Action-like quotas of trying to represent diversity, but not realizing that by deliberately being so selective and obvious, that they’re kind of being more racist than if they weren’t #TRYHARDING so hard.

But what we have here is interesting, because we have a #TRYHARD that is a female of Iraqi descent, which I have to imagine is probably something of a unicorn when it comes to schools in America getting to put a checkmark next to in their diversity results.  It probably definitely helps that this student’s family immigrated to the United States some 30 years ago, which most likely helped them get their foot in the door before America got really, really afraid of brown people.

All the same, she’s still a female of Iraqi descent, which is impressive coming from a culture that basically sees females as third-rate, and of less importance than like, fourth-cousins from their uncle’s side, or cows, and I’m surprised that she didn’t go 34 for 34 in her college applications, because I imagine the pool in which to pull Iraqi females from is probably not even shallow, but a damp spot on the asphalt on a sunny day.

The funniest thing about this particular story is her narrative of opening of response letters from all the colleges, and how her family deliberately saved Harvard for last:

We opened up all the Ivy Leagues one by one and my parents were like, okay, save Harvard for last. We opened Harvard and my mom started crying and she was like telling all of her friends in Iraq, like, my daughter just got into Harvard,”

So it sounds like Harvard was the ultimate goal, as it is for basically every Asian parent on the face of the planet – but then the article goes to explain that she’ll be headed to Yale in the fall instead, with no context or justification for why she’s switching so abruptly like that.  It’s not that such is really any of our business, but it does come off as shoddy journalism to tease the whole wanting to go to Harvard angle, but then to just drop that she’s going to Yale instead.

Either way, another thing that’s interesting is the fact that this story actually mentioned the failure rate of this student; most of the time, these #TRYHARD stories are quick to round to the nearest high number, or just say the number of acceptances flat, but despite the fact that this girl got into 21 schools, she also failed to get into 13 of them.

Considering four of them were Ivies, other than perhaps the other four Ivy League schools, it leads to wonder what schools would turn this girl down, not knowing that they had already gotten into Harvard and Yale among other prestigious schools.  Like it would be funny if like Cal State-Fullerton or Long Beach State were all like “ehhh, nah, pass” while Stanford, Yale and Harvard all said yes.

Anyway, at this point, I think I’m done with writing about #TRYHARDSZN2024.  I think I’ve proven my point that there are a tremendous amount of #TRYHARDs that come out of the woodwork nowadays, and that most of them seem to be doing it not so much for genuine consideration for their futures, as much as it’s just a big dick Keeping Up With the Joneses competition to see who can get into the most schools, amass the most amount of scholarship money, and generally be the most obnoxiously insufferable overachievers there are, when the vast majority of these #TRYHARDs are exploiting some unfair advantages that not everyone in the country would be entitled to.

Short of some exceptional stories, we’ll mark the female Iraqi Unicorn as the closing chapter to #TRYHARDSZN2024.  Until next year (maybe)!

#TRYHARDSZN2024: Uganda be kidding me

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Binyebwa: Oakland teenager accepted into 122 colleges and amassed over $5M in scholarship dollars; chooses UC Berkeley because he wants to be a musician

I’ll be honest, I actually don’t know what Berkeley is actually famous for, but I didn’t think it was a place for aspiring musicians.  It’s a reputable enough school to be known by name, but I’m a bit puzzled on why it would be a school where an aspiring musician would name drop to be where they want to go to pursue their career.

Apparently, Berkeley is known for its mathematical science, as well as the Space Sciences Laboratory, according to Google, and some light digging doesn’t show anywhere where music is a viable path to thriving  as a student there.

But then again, if I wanted to pursue my architectural design degree, and for some reason, Berkeley were among the schools that I were accepted to, and I could go to for in-state tuition as well as the fact that I wouldn’t be too far off from home if I’m from nearby Oakland, it would be something to consider going there, solely for the name value alone, because it still is a reputable institution regardless of what I’m attending there for.

Either way, despite the fact that we have a queen of #TRYHARDs anointed this #SZN for her 200+ college acceptances, I would say that we should all rise for the king of #TRYHARDs this #SZN, the Ugandan boy from Oakland who has collected 122 college acceptances and amassed $5.3M in scholarship offers.

Thanks to him and the queen, all the other pleebs who only got into 30, 50 and 60 colleges seem like common peasants now.

But it is pretty funny when I think about this particular #TRYHARD; boy wants to be a singer, an entertainer of some sort, which most people in the world of entertainment would simply respond to a kid saying they wanted to get into the business with a stern and nihilistic, don’t.  However, that’s not stopping this one kid from chasing his dream, considering he survived immigration into America and is probably living a slightly better life than if he were still living in Uganda.

At some point he realized that he could still chase his musical dreams, but when the day is over, it’s still important to have an education, so he starts flinging college applications out like Gambit throws playing cards, and because of his obvious attributes, the acceptances start rolling in and next thing you know, he’s got 122 of these things.

Obviously despite the fact that he picked Berkeley, it’s a safe bet that many of them were probably the UC-campuses that are not Berkeley and are less known or reputable.  Hell probably among them were some actual music schools, but when the day is over, entertainment is really, really, really hard to break into, and it’s probably for the best that he’ll have a Berkeley degree to fall back onto instead of some shitty wannabe Julliard of the west coast.

Overall, it’s just funny.  Guy wants to sing, but still wants to fulfill obligation to go to college.  Fires applications out like crazy, gets into a ton of them, including a well-reputable school. It’s like accidentally became the 2024 King of the #TRYHARDs.  Uganda be kidding me!

#TRYHARDSZN2024: The Arrogance is real and appropriate for Duke

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TL;DR: teenager from Scotland not the country, North Carolina, accepted into more than 30 schools, selects Duke University

Firstly, if any of my zero readers were to click the link to de-anonymize this #TRYHARD, I have to ask if all of the photographs of her are actual photographs or if they’re paintings?  They’re processed so crudely that they look like paintings, and I know I’m already calling her arrogant, but I don’t think to the degree where she’d have paintings of herself in graduation.  But I guess out in Scotlandnotthecountry, North Carolina, they don’t have any reliable graphic designers anywhere to not make photographs look like shitty watercolor paintings.

But anyway, here we have another #TRYHARD who is just arrogant enough to pique my interest, because when the day is over, she’s really not that hot shit because she basically applied to every college in the state of North Carolina and because the article points out that she raked in nearly $1M in scholarships, not to mention will be getting aide from the Gates Scholarship which basically is a free ride to anywhere, any and all credentials and accolades have to be mentioned to really sell this #TRYHARD in a sea where there are fish who have cleared 60, 120, and 200+ college acceptances themselves.

To cut to the chase, she ultimately picked Duke, which is definitely a good reputable school in academics, but it’s also among the most insufferable institutions on the planet if you want people to hate your guts for any reason at all.  But it seems to be a match made in heaven already, because when describing her journey of when she started getting acceptance letters, she’s clearly got the arrogant part of being a blue blooded Dookie already down:

When she began opening her accepting letters, she thought it was too good to be true.

I was like, I need some rejection. I need to be humbled,” Revels joked.

Oh please, someone reject me just so I know that I haven’t applied to every single UNC-Wherever satellite school for agriculture among a few others that will still give me the time of day simply because of my demographic credentials.

But then it gets better and in this case I mean worse, as in her arrogant humble-bragging just continues to grow, in thinking that perhaps she sold herself short by not applying to bigger and better schools, like perhaps any Ivy Leagues (that we know of):

Despite being accepted into so many schools, Revels admitted she regrets she didn’t reach higher.

Don’t sell yourself short. I felt like Duke was my highest reach. Why not go higher and go to Harvard, Yale, Princeton? You never know what could happen,” Revels said.

Man, despite getting into a school like Duke, she doesn’t hesitate to take a dump on them and loudly ponder on if she could have done even better.  That’s quite some arrogance.

Welp, it’s because you did have doubts and did sell yourself short, and didn’t bother try to get into any of the Ivy Leagues.  Frankly, Harvard has accepted just about everyone under the sun this year that wasn’t white, so it stands to believe that this one probably would’ve made it through as well, but she didn’t try, and therefore she won’t know, and despite her high degree of arrogance, she most definitely falls short in the rankings of #TRYHARDs this #SZN.

Didn’t try hard?  Then you can die hard.  Owned

#TRYHARDSZN2024: When going 11/11 just doesn’t seem special anymore

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Sauce: Michigan high school senior gets into all eleven of the schools she applied to, including 5/5 on Ivies

Okay, so I’ve been doing this for this #TRYHARDSZN and I’ve gotten to the point where success stories like this just don’t really seem like that big of a deal anymore.  Regardless of the fact that she got into five Ivy League schools, all I really think about is why she only applied to five of the Ivy Leagues and why not all eight of them?

What did Penn, Columbia and Dartmouth not do to make this #TRYHARD omit them from her applying spree, because I have to imagine that someone who’s applying to five Ivy League schools may as well shoot for all eight of them, and hedge their bets and go for among the rarest of feats, which is getting the Ivy Sweep which is an actual term borne from the fact that there are so many #TRYHARDs on a yearly basis that try to get into all of them, presumably for the bragging rights and not because of anything else.

But other than the fact that I’m getting tired of stories of #TRYHARDs and am tiring of writing about them, frankly a story like this one where a chica goes 11 for 11 in applications and among them are five of the Ivy League schools, just doesn’t really seem special anymore.

No feigned arrogance for me to dissect, no reports of cumulative scholarship money earned for me to point out that the schools they applied to must’ve been low-tier, just a hard working teenager who only abused the application system just a little bit, and got into all of the schools she applied to.  Sure, I could say that in a real-world scenario where she had to pay for her own application fees, she’s probably looking at somewhere around $3,000 if I had to guestimate, but I’ve already made that observation about 15 other times from all the other #TRYHARDs I’ve chronicled this #SZN.

They’re planning on going to Yale.  So was Zack Morris, and look what happened there.

So we’ll leave it at that, congratulations to a #TRYHARD for getting into all these high-tier schools, but in the grand scheme of the game of trying hard, she’s but a mere blip in the bucket of #TRYHARDs applying to everything under the sun and probably not paying anything for it.

#TRYHARDSZN2024: I’m surprised she’s alive to TRYHARD

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Honestly it’s hard to stay motivated to keep writing about all these #TRYHARDs after covering someone who was accepted into 231 schools before picking a random low-tier school, but the show must go on until the clock hits zero: 16-year old Louisiana girl accepted into 60 colleges, presumably graduating early in order to start college

By now, after writing about 20 of these insufferable #TRYHARDs, I’m kind of having some regret for taking this pointless exercise on, but at the same time, it’s something that keeps me writing even when I don’t want to write about it, and for someone who takes pride in sticking with it, there are worse things to complain about, like my life in general but anyway.

It’s obvious that so many people embark on the path of being a #TRYHARD because it brings them attention and they really like attention, but this particular one seems to have gotten bit by the attention bug at an early age, based on this specific quote from the article:

Poullard has also gone viral as a child, when she met former president Barack Obama.

“Still to this day I don’t realize how hard it is to meet the president,” Poullard said. “My daddy told me before we walked in that White House. He’s like ‘When you see the president run up to him and I bet you’ll go viral’. It’s been like 11 years. I just think that’s so crazy.”

It’s almost like daddy wanted his daughter to get gunned down or something, instructing his child to fucking run at the President of the United States.  But clearly the country under Obama probably made it just a hair safer for a five-year old black kid to run at the POTUS, and I didn’t care enough to dig deeper on the claim that she was viral as a kid and being noticed by the internet now for being a #TRYHARD, but it’s evident that the things this 16-year old has done in her life has probably mostly been done in the name of getting attention.

But another telling quote that I found amusing were her so called words of wisdom to those who would also wish to embark on the attention-seeking path of #TRYHARDing:

Just because you don’t have a high A-C-T score or your grades might not be that good, you can still apply to that school if you want to,” Poullard said. “I guarantee you when you have a long list of community services that you’ve done, that’s going to say a lot about you as a person.”

So the takeaway I get from this is that despite being a mediocre student, as long as you don’t set your goals too high, you can still apply to a boatload of schools and get accepted into a lot of them, and as long as you don’t give specifics to the schools you’re applying to, you can still boast that you got into 60 of them and sound like a genius scholar.

I will say though, it must not have been entirely too mediocre, because the reveal at the end is that she’s staying local, and will be going to LSU.  As far as I’m concerned, LSU is one of the better known schools that has collected a #TRYHARD, but I also know them primarily for athletics and know nothing about them academically.  I do know though, that LSU is a school that does party real hard, and has some rough partying culture, and if I’m a parent, I’m definitely sweating sending my 16-year old daughter away to LSU.

For a kid that has been speedrunning life to get to college at the age of 16, there are some harsh, hard realities that are going to come into play once you’re away from home at college, and I hope they’ve learned enough street smarts and have enough maturity to survive college, and rush to become a miserable adult sooner rather than later.

#TRYHARDSZN2024: All hail the queen

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

I don’t think anyone’s beating this: Hinesville, Georgia high school senior accepted into approximately 231 schools, amassing approximately $14,790,695 in cumulative scholarship offers

Welp, I think we’ve found our alpha #TRYHARD for the 2024 season, at least for the category of kids who apply to every single college under the fucking sun, because I can’t imagine that there’s anyone out there that’s going to surpass 231 acceptances at this stage of the season where most selections have to be made, like last week.

What’s amusing to me from this article is the approximation as far as the number of acceptances and the cumulative scholarship dollars are concerned.  Usually I feel like lots of these #TRYHARD stories just kind of round to a nice round number, usually 50+ unless it’s really high, to which approximation comes into play, and I suppose when you’ve got 231 fucking college acceptances, you really want to shout that from the rooftops.

I mean earlier in the year we had like 60+ and 80+, but this girl right here is the true queen, who clearly has been applying to colleges since 2022, because I remember how long a single college application takes, but to repeat the entire exercise over 231 times because I don’t believe that it’s possible for her to have batted a perfect 1.000 here, she clearly has been copy and pasting her credentials, or she’s getting some sort of advantageous means to apply to all these schools on a fast track. 

Either way, it does seem kind of fucked up, and really makes me wonder what the quality of life this girl has been living over the last few years, or wondering where she’s had time to apply to all these schools on top of the supposed extracurriculars, volunteer work and workload commitments she must’ve had.

Imagine if she had to pay for all these applications because I don’t imagine she had to pay a cent if she’s applying to over 231 schools.  Google says the average is around $75-90 which is bullshit because I remember it being way higher when I was applying to schools, but even still, multiplying that to just 231 is still $17,325 on the low end, not including the schools applied to that she didn’t get into, let’s round up, and since all these #TRYHARDs love to spout numbers, let’s estimate that she should’ve been billed about $20,000 just to apply to all these schools but more than likely didn’t have to pay.

But in true #TRYHARD fashion, as mind-blowing as 231 acceptances is, the lack of clarity on any notable acceptances, the rush to boast numbers and aggregate scholarship dollars, still indicates that the quality of the #TRYHARDING is on the low-end, especially considering her end result is selecting High Point University, in North Carolina.

I know where High Point is, since it’s in that space between Charlotte and Greensboro, and I know if it as a place that signifies that the boring-ass stretch of nothing in between the two is coming to an end when going northbound.  I also work a lot with a studio out there that did photography for my old company, and knew some nice folks there, but still by and large, High Point is a place where most people don’t really know where it is and probably have to Google it in order to find out where it is, and the fact that out of 231 schools, High Point University is the one that wins out means that the pool probably wasn’t populated by any heavy-hitters.

I mean, a free ride is a free ride, but High Point’s average tuition is allegedly $42K a year for an out-of-state student, and if she’s getting a free ride, we’re looking at like $170K give or take.  That being said, considering she amassed just under $15M in scholarships, I can’t help but be curious to know what kind of underwhelming offers there were from the 230 other schools that don’t have the dubious distinction of being selected by the 2024 queen of #TRYHARDs.

Whatever though, good on this #TRYHARD for getting a free ride.  I’m sure her parents are proud and relieved to know they won’t have to pay for schooling, and that they’ve got a child that will finagle an expensive piece of paper for free, and has demonstrated the ability to do a repetitive, monotonous task over and over again, like applying to mediocre colleges.  Can’t imagine the much more sky being the limit for these underwhelming expectations, but then again I also never finished college either, so I guess I should take my own advice and bow down to the queen (of #TRYHARDs).

#TRYHARDSZN2024: Just 17??

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Sós: Westlake High senior accepted into 17 colleges, amassing over $1M in combined scholarship offers

I’m convinced the only thing students are taught at Westlake High is how to apply to colleges, and once they become proficient at it, it’s all they do every day at school.  Because this is the third time this #TRYHARDSZN that I’m dipping into a story about students at Westlake High who have been accepted into a large number of colleges; all of which have made sure to mention the aggregate dollar amount of scholarships they’ve been offered, which is typically the tell-tale sign that most of the schools they were accepted to aren’t really that prestigious.

But to review, we’ve had students that cleared 63 and 50 acceptances, and then one who cleared 50+, so a student “only” being accepted into 17 schools seems kind of booty in comparison, especially seeing as how in their insufferably terrible senior wall where all students humblebrag or be ashamed of how many or how little schools they’ve been accepted into, there were more than just a few that probably had 17+ acceptances posted on the wall.

However, doing the math, and clearing $1M in combined scholarships out of just 17 acceptances blows the fuck out of water compared to the other TRYHARDs of the SZN who needed 50+ schools to clear the $1M mark.  Which means that she’s gotten some substantially heavier ride offers from fewer schools than her peers at CollegeApp High.

One thing that is a little different about this #TRYHARD’s story is that she actually has a pick named, and isn’t just being mum about where she’s going to go because they’re still phishing out a free ride from somewhere; and it’s of all the schools in the country, she’s picking Notre Dame.

I respect the ambition and the absolute get-the-fuck-out-of-the-hood mentality she’s taking, but I have to imagine it’s going to be a tremendous amount of culture shock going up to South Bend.  Especially from southwest Atlanta, going to lily-white Indiana where the winters are going to be brutal and the number of black people is going to feel like she’s going to Norway.

But considering her successes with #TRYHARDing, she’ll probably be alright in the end.  Good on this one for actually stating intent to go somewhere remotely prestigious, and not just doing it for humblebragging attention.