Month: January 2015

Oh, Square

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Long story short: Final Fantasy XV (fifteen(!!)) becomes the first Final Fantasy game in the franchise to have the trademark Cid character be a female.

Knee-jerk reaction: It’s sad to think that Cid, who has always been somewhat a symbol of integrity, importance and sometimes humor, has been reduced to a token pile of tits for this one.  I’m not saying that she’s not going to be possibly important, possibly humorous and possibly have integrity, but she’s still going to be paraded around like a pile of tits.

It’s seeing things like this that make me tell myself that I really wish the franchise would go with its namesake, and actually finalize the fantasy, and stop making them.  Obviously that will never happen, because the franchise is a veritable printer of money, but it’s still a sad state of affair that the series continues to go down this bumpy slope, even if it is reflecting and attempting its hardest to appeal to modern ideals.

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Gym math is clearly difficult

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

While at the gym I saw a guy doing chest fly on a machine.  I mean, there’s a joke in that itself because machines are for people who don’t lift, but hear me out on this one.

Crucified on the stack of weights of 15 lb. increments were two 45 lb. plates.  Adding a plate onto the pin isn’t necessarily an uncommon practice, as I’ve seen plenty of people at the gym do it when certain machines for whatever reason lacked the “add +5” mini plates, or if they were such beasts that the maximum weight were not enough, and they insisted on adding ten more pounds instead of graduating to y’know, free weights.

But to add two plates, much less plates the weight of 45 lbs. apiece, that’s a first for me.  But here’s also where the story begins to get a little funny, at least to me, and hopefully you reading this.

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The Braves are going to suck in 2015, and I kind of can’t wait

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Impetus: The Atlanta Braves trade catcher Evan Gattis to the Houston Astros for three prospects.

Between Jason Heyward, Justin Upton and now Evan Gattis, the Braves have now traded away the bats that have been responsible for 114 of the team’s last 304 home runs over the last two years.  Sure, home runs aren’t necessarily the appropriate measuring stick for talent, but they certainly are popular.  And maybe 114 doesn’t sound like a lot, considering it’s a little over 30%, but those 304 home runs in the last two seasons took 40 players each year to accumulate.  Now take away three guys that made a large chunk of those home runs happen, and you’ve got a team that isn’t going to show up on any highlight packages any time soon.

Needless to say, the MO of the Braves organization right now is to punt on 2015, and hold their breath and hope that the prospects that they’ve traded away several of their most valuable assets to acquire will develop into talented stars, and lead the team back into contention at a later date.  Unfortunately for Braves fans, that means a very likely scenario of really bad seasons in 2015, 2016 and if the prospects don’t pan out (which they probably won’t, because most prospects don’t), and in 2017 too.

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When creative parodying strikes

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

I once saw a meme image that stated “your shirt says UFC but your body says KFC.”  Bahahahaha.

I laughed about it heartily.

There’s a guy at my gym that is an obvious resolutioner, and I’m pretty perceptive and good at recognizing people at places that I go regularly.  To this resolutioner’s credit, he has been coming at least once a week for the last three now, but that is still no indication that he might vanish come February, but the thing is, that there are two things that I noticed about this guy:

  1. 100% of his “working out” is spent in cable crossovers.  Whether anything that can be done with cables, he’s doing with cables.  Sometimes he’ll jump up and grab the cross beam and try to do some pull ups, but literally 100% of his time in the gym is spent amidst the cables.  Naturally, no leg workouts occur here, either.
  2. He always wears this pair of TAPOUT shorts.  Sometimes in conjunction with a TAPOUT shirt.

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College football and wrestling logic, revisited

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Ultimately, if it were up to me, I would have liked to have seen Oregon win the National Championship, because when the day is over, it’s always fun to see Ohio State get shit on.  But when the mighty Oregon offense simply could not accomplish anything against Ohio State’s defense, even after halftime, the writing was on the wall and I frankly didn’t even have to stay up until the finish to know that the Ducks were toast.

As a consolation prize though, however, I can apply the aforementioned wrestling logic that Virginia Tech are the uncrowned National Champions, by virtue of being the one team that actually beat Ohio State throughout the entire season.

This is where Rick Rude with Frank Beamer emerges from the curtain to shit on the championship parade being held by the Ultimate Warrior after beating Hulk Hogan to remind the Warrior that he still has his own championship victory over him, and that BCS Redemption sponsored by Snickers, the National Championship should be on the line against the Hokies.

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Rank shaming is basically the lamest form of flaming

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

I was playing League of Legends one day (big surprise), and I was in a game with a teammate of marginal talent, repeatedly dying.  Eventually they blamed their performance (or lack thereof) on the royal lag, which is obviously the reason why anyone has a bad game, because everyone is extremely talented at League of Legends and the only thing that can suppress their immense talent would be uncontrollable ISP maladies.

Anyway, my natural response to someone whining about lag was to basically tell them to stop playing, because let’s face it, it’s not fair to their current and their future teammates to repeatedly enter games with their true talents inhibited by connectivity issues, and not necessarily said to (entirely) antagonize them.  But naturally, since 95% of LoL’s player base are functioning deadbeats, they naturally took it personally and decided to spend the rest of the game antagonizing me as best as they could, which is to say pathetically and completely ineffectively.

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