I touched on the apparent martyr complex that my eldest daughter has developed over the last few weeks in a previous dad brog, where her go-to reaction to hearing anything that she doesn’t like is to immediately proclaim that I, or mythical wife, or both of us, love our second child more than her, that nobody loves her, nobody wants her to be happy, etc, etc.

But after a few more weeks of dealing with this bullshit, I’m ready to proclaim that year six has been the hardest point of parenting that I think I’ve come across over the last six-plus years of raising a child.  Neither of my kids really went through the terrible twos, and comparatively, year three was harder for both of them, but neither of those years compared to insufferable six that I’m dealing with, with #1 these days.

It’s almost like having a colicky baby all over again, where once the lazer is charged, there’s pretty much nothing that can be done except to let it discharge and run its course.  The difference is that a six year old can communicate their frustrations, and could explain it if they wanted to, or could even rationalize what’s setting them off, but writing this out, I guess it’s really not that different from a colicky baby episode after all.  Instead, it’s just a whole lot of mostly incoherent rambling about how nobody loves them, nobody wants them to be happy, everyone bosses her around because they’re older and think they’re smarter.

The kicker is that this primarily the case whenever we the parents are forced to take tech away from her, be it her iPad on the weekends when we let the kids stay up and watch a little bit of streaming shows, or when she’s staying up way too late listening to things on her Echo Dot, and we’re forced to physically remove the unit outright from her room.

As if any parent needs to be reminded of the potential risks of too much tech with their children.  After yesterday’s blow up, I think the Dot is permanently removed from the room, and such will remain the case until some more good faith and responsibility comes along.

Seriously though, it’s been real difficult dealing with an insufferable six.  Changing diapers and sleep regressions and teething episodes were tough, but these past few weeks are taking me right back to that state of mind, feeling bewildered, helpless and just not knowing what I can do as a father to work through all these crash outs.  I hate hearing my children upset and crying and wailing, and regardless of how bullshit and self-inflicted the anguish is, it’s still something that as a father, I want to be able to help bring them out of it, without resorting to cheap bribery or enabling patterns that will just fuck me over later down the line.