This a prime example of why having a netbook is dangerous. Because the ease in which I can pop it open, open up a Notepad box, and jot down words, I now have a written record of something that was swirling in my head at some point.
I bring to you, an unedited, unaltered actual saved document that I made based on me remembering a vivid dream, and getting it down in text before I went back to sleep, because for some reason, I thought it was worth sharing. Well, it really isn’t, but the notion of how silly it is, kind of does.
I bring to you, Retroactive-Man.
retroactive man, like prince of persia where i can go back in time.
i deal with a bully type guy who constantly wants to torment me, only for me to absorb the first blow each time, to figure out the best way to retroactively go back and counter it.
throws rocks at me and friends in an alley – i rewind and find out where to catch each rock and then throw back
leaves threatening message in my popcorn tin – i re-write it so that in the process of doing it, he gets itching powder on his fingertips, and rubs it on his balls later
charges me in the parking lot
constantly wants to fight – i rewind and he gets his ass kicked and sodomized by someone else he shouldn’t be messing with
all because i prevented him from killing a paris hilton-like girl in a city, and then beat him at mario kart
Believe me, this wasn’t after the seven beers I had after the Varentines Prom, either. This was before I was taking Nyquil every night to fight off bulldykefluenza. This was a plain old dream that I had during an ordinary night of rest, and in the midst of being waken up by the dog who has to go piss in an inordinate hour of the night, I saw it necessary to crack open the netbook and jot these notes down.
From the jist of it, I vaguely do remember the dream, and basically to clarify, I, Retroactive-Man, that is, could go back in short bursts, exactly like Prince of Persia and then re-do the current events, naturally to the benefit of my best interests. And in this dream, I had a Wiley Coyote-like adversary who I kept thwarting at all his attempts to kill/harm me, by utilizing my powers to go back in time. And somewhere in dream-land, after being thwarted, he gets his ass kicked by someone he shouldn’t have fucked with, sodomized, and ends up with itching powder on his balls.
Sure, I’d take the first hit each time, but then I’d rewind back in time and start over, but with knowledge of what was coming instead, to where I’d successfully fend it off, much to the dismay of this bully. If I had to put a face to the name for recognition sake, it would’ve been like a bald version of Ethan Suplee, probably. And the reason I got on his shit-list in the first place, is because I thwarted him when he tried to kill a girl that looked a lot like, and could very well have been Paris Hilton, since regardless of what everyone else thinks, I still think she’s kinda hot, and I’m a chivalrous kind of guy who would come to the rescue of a damsel in distress. But it was actually losing a game of Mario Kart to me that actually pushed him over the deep end to where he wanted my head.
Anyway, it was a good idea to jot it down when I was half-asleep, but looking back on it, it is still such a lame and campy plot. But in the end, it was still a good idea to have done so, because now it gives me something interesting to blog about.
