Okay. I know that this wasn’t a surprise. But still it sucks to have not seen one failure, in a season set up to have at least like two failures.
Despite the fact that I had pegged at least one couple as a shoe-in to achieve colossal failure, for all intents and purposes, every single couple of season 2 of TLC’s 90 Day Fiancé made it to the altar, and both parties said “I do.”
This wasn’t that tremendous of a surprise, because people do dumb things as long as they’re being put on television. But still, I really wanted to see one member of at least one couple decide that the circumstances were just too exasperating, or something clearly turned out to not be what they had hoped for, and said fuck it, and went back to their native country, and/or break it off and send their mail-order spouse packing.
However, the 100% success rate of the couples (again) isn’t necessarily what I’m calling shenanigans on. It’s the fact that the steam hadn’t even stopped rising from the bullshit that is/was the marriage between the most polarizing couple of the show, Danielle and Mohamed, before Mohamed went full heel-turn on everyone, including the show itself, leaving the show’s regulation period ending with nothing but a cliffhanger and questions, which may or may not actually be answered in the follow-up show that I obviously couldn’t wait for before brogging about it.
But seriously, for the majority of people that aren’t obsessed with TLC and do not watch 90 Day Fiancé, the TL;DR is that Danielle is a pathetic divorcee that brought over Mohamed to marry, in spite of a 15-year age difference, and everyone including her family and pretty much all viewers predicted a green card scam. Mohamed refused to sleep with her or even kiss her, even after they finally married, and inevitably, Mohamed walks out on Danielle pretty quickly after the wedding. Or in, or out, or in-and-out. It’s all left very ambiguous, and to no surprise, I’m not the only person fascinated with their trainwreck of a story.
I do however, love the cliché way in which Mohamed turned heel on Danielle though. I didn’t think such transformations actually existed outside the world of professional wrestling. Throughout the show’s airing, Mohamed was always portrayed as a pretty conservative guy, wearing modest clothing, hiding behind an ambiguous veil of religion as justification to do, or rather not do, things considered unfaithful to Allah or whomever. He even rebuffs a skanky bar fly, citing he actually prefers Danielle’s modesty alternatively.
Mohamed eventually becomes the one viewers inevitably root for and empathize with, because he’s the straighter head amongst Danielle’s dysfunctional family, understanding financial woes, the importance of hard work, and that relationships are built on trust and teamwork, so it kind of almost makes you believe that maybe he’s not really just trying to commit the obvious green card scam.
That is, until he apparently does. He consults with a lawyer to confirm the responsibilities of marriage, leaving Danielle wondering if they’re actually getting married; on the wedding day. And then Mohamed refuses to kiss Danielle in front of all (ten) of their guests, citing Ramadan as justification, during the wedding ceremony.
And then, Mohamed walks out on Danielle. Granted, I’d be exasperated too if my financially-irresponsible new wife were so oft-negligent to pay the power bill and the power went out when I’m trying to check out babes on OkCupid too, but the point remains is that Mohamed barely waited at all before executing his plan of green card scamming, after he hooked Danielle.
But then, Mohamed is briefly shown in the final episode of the show, back at Danielle’s house, appearing to be playing Connect Four on an iMac before he’s kind of cornered by show producers, trying to get his side of the story. By this point, Mohamed has gone full dark side, and it’s kind of great in how cliché it all is; flamboyantly colored track suit, douchey deal with it shades over his head, and he cuts a vicious, old-country promo about how he’s a man, and that he’s free, and he can do whatever he wants, whenever he wants, before getting up and shutting himself into a bedroom that he doesn’t sleep in.
I mean, I’m kind of torn. The dramatic heel-turn of Mohamed is undoubtedly great television, and I’m dying to know whether or not some clarity will be achieved during the follow-up show on Sunday. But on the same token, Mohamed saving the scam in his back pocket for after the wedding really did bone my predictions that at least one couple (them) were without question, going to fail. And I really like being right about things, even if it doesn’t really happen that often. Granted, it’s obvious he really wants that green card, but come on, with all this shit televised, even I have to believe that it’s going to be difficult to keep up this façade and actually convince those who dole out green cards to believe that this wasn’t a scam.
God damn it, there better be a failure next season. TLC can’t really believe that there are people with so much tenacity to stick to a green card scam, that they’re so willing to not give up on some of these scam relationships.
