Tag: basketball

A proposal to combat tanking in the NBA

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

I used to really like basketball when I was younger, but now I really dislike it.  At first, it was the NBA, because after they went on strike in 1999, it was a downhill spiral from there, and it’s stuck in this unappealing mire of bullshit to this day, and still managing to sink further with each passing season (except the Spurs, I ♥ the Spurs still).  College basketball is still superior, but I’m also growing tired of how corporate it, and college football are becoming because of all the monetary potential in them, and how greedy people are leading children down a slippery slope of pursuing quick greed, fame and fortune instead of the educations that they’re often times getting for free just to play sports.

But today, we’re here to talk about the NBA, and namely the tanking that has become notoriously blatant.  If you weren’t aware, tanking is basically when a team loses on purpose, so that they can position themselves in an optimal position in the following year’s draft, with hopes that they can get the first, or at least a top-5 pick, which are usually highly talented, difference-making players.

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Caption says it all

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It’s no secret that when it comes to college sports, I have a team in Virginia Tech, no matter how disappointing they are in football, no matter how mediocre they are in basketball, and no matter how much of a non-factor they are in baseball. However, I have another team that I favor pretty often: whomever is playing against Duke.

Last night, North Carolina defeated Duke, which the fact of that alone is pleasing, but the visuals that accompanied the discovery of such news were absolutely abhorring. After the clock wound down, the people of the Dean Dome stormed the court.

The University of North Carolina stormed the court after defeating Duke in men’s basketball.

Now I believe that there is a lot of importance in the act of storming the court (especially when it’s after defeating Duke), but in addition to the importance of doing it, there’s as much meaning behind in when storming the court isn’t done.

UNC is one of the few basketball programs in the country that should absolutely never storm the court upon defeating Duke. They’re supposed to be Duke’s greatest rivals; equal, if not better, having a superior educational program and students and alumni of a higher class.

Doing it might have seemed cool and like a great idea at the time, but it’s probably going to have some petty, obnoxious (and very much white) repercussions. Articles (again) about opponents storming the court on Duke by the Duke studentpubs, and heaven have mercy on all UNC fans if Duke wins the rematch on March 8 in Durham, because retribution will be insufferable and cringeworthy when Duke fans storm their own court in defeat of Carolina.

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Has there ever been a story of such eternal ownage worse than Michael Jordan over Patrick Ewing?

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

I’m reading this article where Michael Jordan is asked if he can name the greatest dunk of his career. Keep in mind that in spite of the two fake retirements, Michael Jordan played in over 1,000 games over 13 NBA seasons, which is the equivalent of 41,000 minutes or 683 hours and is arguably the most prolific scorer in his generation. That’s a whole lot of basketball played, a massive number of points scored, and most definitely a whole lot of dunks thrown down. You’d have to think ol’ MJ would have to stop and think for a moment about what his greatest dunk was.

Nope. Apparently, MJ has thought about it a lot throughout his life, so he has an answer prepared for when there is any time people want to know what he thinks his greatest dunk was.

He zeroes right back to 1991 in the Eastern Conference finals or semi-finals, where it was the Bulls and Knicks, and declares this particular dunk, the greatest dunk in his entire career.

The dunk was on Patrick Ewing, who has never been a stranger to the concept of getting dunked on, but the bottom line is that throughout his entire basketball career, nobody has tormented him and continues to torment him like Michael Jordan does. There’s not even appropriate words to describe it; Patrick Ewing is Michael Jordan’s bitch; Michael Jordan owns Patrick Ewing.

The subject is a serious question; has there ever been a case of one guy owning another guy as long as Jordan has owned Ewing?

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We all know the NBA is racist, but come on

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

I admit, I hardly pay any attention to the NBA these days, save for a few days in June, if the Spurs are knocking on the door of championship. But it doesn’t really take more than a casual basketball observer to see what’s going on in this situation, when apparently all of the NBA teams’ general managers got together and conducted a little survey about their respective league and its players, and happened to have one particular query called:

Which player makes the most of limited natural ability?

With an overwhelming majority of 24% of the vote, Kevin Love was voted the guy who made the most of “limited natural ability.” Think about that phrase for a second; it’s almost like saying the “fastest paraplegic runner with no legs” or “most capable clinically dead person.” Okay, so maybe those are some exaggerated examples, but there’s no denying the fact that it’s a very backhanded compliment of an “achievement” for NBA general managers to slap onto a guy.

The thing is, I know who Kevin Love is, because in spite of his apparent ability to maximize his limited natural abilities, he’s actually a pretty popular basketball player. Partially due to his propensity to hit some buzzer beaters from time to time and that he’s a pretty good rebounder, but mostly because the obvious fact that Kevin Love is white. He’s a white guy in the NBA, and has a pretty colorful personality to boot, as humorously evident in his candor in blurting out the very obvious as it pertains to his “win” as the guy to best utilize his limited natural abilities.

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Grant Hill probably wants to kill Jason Kidd

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

No seriously, I wouldn’t be surprised that behind that cool, calm and collected demeanor that Grant Hill always displays to the public, that there is a demon inside of him.  And that’s not a reference to his fancy white-collar Duke education and that he was also a Blue Devil back in those days, but more of a metaphorical devil of jealousy or resentment – towards the existence of Jason Kidd.

From the day they broke into the NBA in the same year, to just weeks ago when both had declared their retirement after 18 seasons, so often was the case was whenever Grant Hill’s name was mentioned, it wasn’t long afterward that Jason Kidd was brought up.  It’s fun for me to theorize by claiming it, and it’s most certainly realistically not deliberate, but as far as I see it, Jason Kidd has spent his entire career essentially, ruining Grant Hill’s career.

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Why I hope the Spurs win it all

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Not that I pay a tremendous amount of attention to the NBA, but it’s almost impossible to ignore when some awful four-lettered “sports channel” is on just about everywhere from the gym to various restaurants.  That being said, I was astutely aware that as of right now, half of the NBA Finals is set, with the San Antonio Spurs securing their spot in the finals.  Meanwhile the Heat and Pacers are duking it out in the east, to see who will oppose them for the championship.

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An attempt to put into words how much I hate ESPN

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

It’s not that want anyone to keel over and die, but if Stephen A. Smith were to keel over and die, I’m pretty sure that not only would I not give a shit, there would be a part of me that would be glad.  Yes, that’s a horrible thing to put into writing, but I can’t really say that it would be an inaccurate statement.

Whenever Stephen A. Smith is on television, which is unfortunately way more than he should be, because the retards at my gym have the locker room televisions set to ESPN, and there’s no known way to change the channels without a remote, and First Take seems to be on for eleventy-billion hour blocks at a time, I want to shower and dress out and get out of the locker room as quickly as humanly possible.

Stephen A. Smith makes me want to get away from a screen faster than a snuff film, or any one of those ASPCA commercials with Sarah McLaughlin music in the background.

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