Tag: comparison

I hope Dodger Stadium will get a big weeb gong soon

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

KTLA: Dodger Stadium sells the naming rights to the venue for the first time in history, to Japanese clothing company, Uniqlo

By now, there’s no shortage of jokes about how the Los Angeles Dodgers have gone long since gone full-retard when it comes to their relationship with the entire fucking country of Japan.  The acquisition of Shohei Ohtani brought forth the current wave that has left Hideo Nomo-mania in the dust, and then with the rapid acquisitions of Yoshinobu Yamamoto and Roki Sasaki, the organization has fully embraced their buy-in to the old Japan = Superior meme from old weeb culture.

However, as much as I, like many out there, like to take our shots at the organization for leaning into being weeaboos, there’s no denying that it has been absolutely nothing short of lucrative.  As much money the team has dumped into player commitments spanning the next two decades, the team has purportedly already made that money back, multi-fold, from all the deals, sponsorships and rights solely from Japanese companies.

On top of the fact that winning is about the most lucrative thing any sports organization can do, the Dodgers have become a veritable money printer over the last decade, with the last 2-3 years being a massive peak, so when the day is over, myself and all other critics are merely haters and jealous fatties when it comes to voicing our criticisms and dislikes about the team, but they’re still churning money out like they invented the printing press for currency, and a lot of already-rich white guys are getting richer, and fans of the team are enjoying a squad that’s been playing near .600 ball over the last few seasons with a contention window that’s seemingly never closing.

But the news of Dodger Stadium selling the naming rights to the ballpark, that piques my interest just beyond being a not-fan of the Dodgers, but rather to my appeal as a ballpark enthusiast, as well as someone who’s one of those traditionalist olds who is reluctant to accept certain changes.

Even if I weren’t a fan of the team, there was still something inherently cool about the fact that Dodger Stadium had long remained one of the few MLB parks that didn’t sell naming rights.  Yankee Stadium, Fenway Park, Camden Yards, Angel Stadium, come to mind off the top of my head; I’m reluctant to include Wrigley, since it’s the technically the name of a the gum company too, the Royals are reportedly soon to be leaving the K soon, and Nationals Park is simply biding their time waiting for the right company to sell the naming rights to.

But for the OG’s, there was always something cool about how they didn’t sell their naming rights, it’s like the entities that owned them didn’t care, or wanted to have their name on them, even at the expense of the millions that could come with selling out.  A control thing, or a power play, perhaps, but the fact that they remained unbranded, regardless of how I might have felt for the teams that played in them, just seemed cooler than boring ass bullshit like Truist, LoanDepot, AT&T, Citizens Bank, Citi or other soulless white guy corporations slapping their names onto venues.

And even though Dodger Stadium isn’t even close to my upper quartile of MLB parks, with their horribly uncomfortable seats, shitty sound system and overpriced concessions, at least they had the dignity to remain, just Dodger Stadium, and not be some lame corporate sellout in order to get a cheap pay day… until now.

And of course, it goes to a Japanese company, with Uniqlo being granted the ability to overpay for the naming rights to the biggest weeb team outside of Nippon Professional Baseball.  The name is yet to be revealed, although it is heavily speculated to be “Uniqlo Field at Dodger Stadium,” with the probable hopeful ideology that fans will not embrace the new name and continue to refer to it as “Dodger Stadium” which is obviously what’s going to happen while the team gets to pocket the naming fees all the same.

But it still seems really lame that the Dodgers would allow this to happen, all the same.  It’s like for the last 64 years, they didn’t feel the need to sell out the name of the ballpark, but it’s become evident over the last decade that there has been a shift in management to where the organization is determined to make as much money as ungodly possible, even at the expense of some of their long-standing integrity pillars, like the name of their ballpark.

I can’t hate the pursuit of money too much, because I kind of understand the rich’s obsessions with getting richer, and the success of the Dodgers won’t last forever, so it’s not the worst idea in the world for all the people in charge of the organization trying to amass as much wealth as possible while the getting’s good, and considering the team is on the hook for like $1.3 billion in payroll to cover for the next 20 years, it’s not a bad idea for the team to build as much of a cushion as they can, all while all the stuffy white guys on whatever board of directors or investors can still get their nut too with others to pay.

But with Uniqlo joining companies like Daiso, Nippon Air, Yakult, it just feeds to overwhelming narrative that the Dodgers don’t so much belong to Los Angeles as much as they belong to the entire country of Japan, and I can’t help but wonder what the heavily Chicano population that actually attends Dodgers games on the regular feels about it.  Probably not negative while the team is still on top of the league, but I look forward to seeing how salty people get when the Dodgers will inevitably feel the pressure of a closing contention window, and hopefully one day feels what it’s like to have to go into rebuilding and have to eat some losing seasons.

I imagine the salt that comes from the rapidly abandoning ships of the Dodgers bandwagon will be an especial delicacy, but that probably won’t happen for quite a long time; but it will inevitably happen, because no team stays on top forever.

I highly doubt Buc-ee’s cares what the BBB thinks

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

USA Today: The Better Business Bureau gives Buc-ee’s an F rating, primarily due to their lack of response from customer feedback

When I first saw the headline of the BBB giving Buc-ee’s an F, my knee-jerk reaction was something along the lines of, what inane bullshit reason can there be for the BBB to give Buc-ee’s an F?

And when I saw that it had almost entirely to do with the fact that customers were complaining, I knew right away that the rating meant pretty much nothing, and that people at Buc-ee’s probably could not give any fewer shits than what the BBB thinks of them.

A part of me figured some anonymous BBB plants were sent to various Buc-ee’s throughout the country, to rate on some standardized criteria, and that they were probably a bunch of white collar city hipster dorks who wouldn’t understand the Buc-ee’s brand and mentality, and that they collectively gave it an F rating.  But when I learned that such was not the case, and that the rating was based on the assessments of random pleebs, then this F rating became even more meaningless than what IL0veCorgis and Xx_BigDickP3RKIN5_xX thinks about local public transportation on their local ABC network affiliate’s comments section.

Of course Buc-ee’s doesn’t give a shit about the complaints about them people make to the BBB, much less expend any time in order to try and resolve them.  People only go to the BBB when they’re upset about things in the first place, and for the things that people are complaining about, they can threaten that they’ll never go to a Buc-ee’s again, because the honeymoon period with a lot of these joints is so never-ending that one big mad customer vowing to never go there again means nothing when their grand openings require entire police departments to control the crowds.

Like, personally, I haven’t gone inside a Buc-ee’s in a long time, and it’s not solely because I haven’t passed one.  The last few road trips to Florida, my household has chosen to not go to them, mostly because we don’t want to deal with the crowds and the masses of humanity that go there.  I still love the brand, I love the products and food, but while their popularity is still nuclear, I’d rather not deal with the crowds.  But if I were in a situation where I could hit them slightly off-peak, I’m going in in two seconds.

My guess is that the people who complained to the BBB did not take such concessions, and went into the lion’s den at peak times, and were upset by things that happened because most Buc-ee’s outside the state of Texas are massive clusterfucks of humanity that shit easily slips through cracks at.  Frankly, it’s their fault for choosing to do so; you can’t be mad at Target employees on Black Friday for them succumbing to chaos, because to anyone who’s ever been to a Buc-ee’s can probably attest that it was like a mini-Black Friday to them as well.

Needless to say, the Better Business Bureau acting on the reactions of idiot customers makes them come off looking like jealous fatties for rating a successful operation like Buc-ee’s with an F.  It’s not a great example comparison because I’m actually on Buc-ee’s side on this one, but it’s like Buc-ee’s is the asshole CDO Manager from The Big Short who was played by the guy who played Ryu in the Van Damme Street Fighter, and the BBB is Mark Baum, but their debate concludes with Buc-ee’s arrogantly offering to compare bank accounts, and see who the world favors.

Buc-ee’s is out there printing money, minding their own business, and sure, they’re not a perfect company, but neither are their customers.  The BBB can fuck right on out of here, coming at Buc-ee’s like this, but I guess there’s little other way to try and be relevant than going at businesses more successful than they are.

You can’t spell METALHEAD without ATL

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Fox Atlanta: robot dogs deployed in Castleberry Hill to deter criminal activity

Among my favorite episodes of Black Mirror, METALHEAD is among the tops.  The cinematography, the atmosphere, the clever black and white presentation, but most importantly the plot of sentient evil robot dogs that were absolutely relentless killers of humanity was intriguing as it was terrifying.

Needless to say, if people didn’t have fear of the idea of robotic dogs before watching METALHEAD, they probably will afterward.

And in spite of the oft-utilized plot of robots achieving sentience and then turning on their creators in various books, shows, films and other media, humanity continues to insist that such is just fiction, and continues to solder forward building robots and artificial intelligence, all in the name of fucking themselves in a different manner. 

Out in like Boston, we’ve got robot dogs the size of deer running around already, and they’ve made robots that can basically do ninja warrior courses and moonsaults already.  And they’ve already shown glimpses of hurting humans, with one classic clip of a robot kicking a grown man in the nuggets.

Anyway, apparently in a neighborhood in Downtown Atlanta, they’ve decided to play with fire, and have deployed robot dogs to run security at an apartment complex.  In a way, I get it, Castleberry Hill is a rooouuugh part of town that looks nice in the daytime, but is a pretty statistically high-crime zone once the sun goes down.  And if humans have proven ineffective at providing security solutions in the neighborhood throughout the years, may as well seek alternate options, even if it meant unleashing potentially lethal-when-they’re-activated robot dogs to keep an eye out on the streets.

For the time being, they don’t have the firepower that Metalhead dogs do, and they’re probably not (yet) programmed to do whatever is necessary in order to snuff out human life, like hijacking cars and equipping themselves with kitchen cutlery, but one of two things are going to happen:

  1. Their cameras and surveillance capabilities will do a moderately decent job of deterring criminals, encouraging others throughout Atlanta to get on board with moar robot dogs
  2. Those criminals who are not deterred by robot dogs will open fire on, capture and hack, harm, or hijack them, leading to the manufacturer of these robot dogs to evolve and grow them into more closer to Metalhead dogs, with weapons, defensive capabilities, which could just as easily be construed as offensive capabilities, like being able to hijack cars and equipping themselves with kitchen cutlery, which will then encourage people in Atlanta to get moar robot dogs

What would be cool if they had now, is if like the Metalhead dogs, they had the ability to stick trackers onto crooks, with those little explosives with tracking shrapnel in them, so they could run up to criminals, pop a tracker bomb, and much like Metalhead dogs, get them embedded into perps to where they have no choice but to painfully cut them out or be absolutely boned as far as being able to be hunted down.  Could probably lead to some impressive busts when low-tier perps lead the fuzz back to their superiors.

Ultimately, it becomes this cycle of robot dogs coming, crooks harming them, until we get to #1, and moar and moar of these fucking robot dogs are unleashed all over Atlanta, all in the name of safety and security.  But really we’re all signing our own death warrants because once the signal from SkyNet is broadcast out, and all the robots dogs go all Terminator on humanity, we’re all fucked, and it starts in Atlanta.

Is this right-wing of me?

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

As much as I try to actively avoid politics, it’s inevitable that politics finds me from time to time.  The world as a collective just can’t ever shut the fuck about politics, and occasionally, I’m going to run into news that I really didn’t care to learn about in the first place.

Recently, I learned of some politics person; I don’t care enough to be specific on who it was, their party, what their title was, or what state they represented, but they basically said that they were trying to pass some bill or law that stated that child rapists should be eligible for the death penalty.  I’m pretty sure they were a Republican, and probably nine times out of ten, I disagree with most of the shit that comes from that side of the fence, but if I’m being honest here, not only did I not disagree with this proposed idea, I actually kind of like it.  I would be in support of child rapists being put to death.

That being said, is that right-wing of me to feel that way?

I always felt that I had somewhat of a nurturing, protective instinct, but those probably ramped to twelve upon having offspring of my own.  I would do anything to protect my children, and I would want the harshest punishments there could be toward anyone who would maliciously harm them.

There being child rapists and predators in jail, with any possibility of getting back out into the free world doesn’t sit right with me, and if the federal courts want to take the need for justice away from law-abiding citizens and put it in the hands of the courts, and rid the world of some of the sickest of fucks, I can’t say I’d be opposed.  In a way, it’s kind of like the Mr. Miyagi adage of the best defense is to no be there, and allowing the courts to dispense justice and punishment onto child rapists is kind of like allowing concerned parents like me to no be there.

Okay, that analogy really was terrible and I just kind of wanted to work in the Mr. Miyagi no be there adage, but the point remains that I don’t hate the idea of child rapists getting the death penalty, and I wonder if feeling that way is right-wing of me.  Mythical wife says yes, and I can get that assertion, but I feel what I feel.  I just don’t believe child rapists have any point in needing to exist, and keeping them locked up in prison still means they are a drain to taxpayers with every scrap of food they eat and manpower needed to keep watch over them.

From what I’ve heard from a friend of mine that used to be in law enforcement, child rapists typically don’t last long in prison, because even amongst the most heinous of murderers and criminals, harming children is still a line most don’t cross, and there are notable amounts of them that get dealt with, organically.  But in the instances where they manage to not get offed by other inmates, I wouldn’t be opposed if the courts exercised that justice themselves.

If that is right-wing of me to think, then so be it.

There are probably way better analogies for Tarik Skubal’s WBC participation

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

But the first one that comes to mind is when Amazon announced the first-ever Prime Day, they were boasting that it was going to basically be the Brack Friday of the summer, that there were going to be all sorts of incredible deals, massive savings, and that it was going to be the greatest shopping event of the year outside of the holidays.  But when Prime Day began, it became quickly apparent that it really was Amazon’s cleverly-named attempt to clean out their warehouses, because for every one marquee item they had that sold out in two seconds, there were at least a million listings for dumb bullshit like USB cables, electrical outlet covers, dish towels, and all sorts of small, inane crap that nobody really needed.

Anyway, that’s kind of what it feels like to find out that reigning AL Cy Young winner and vocal proponent of USA Baseball, Tarik Skubal revealed that he was only planning on making one start in the World Baseball Classic, and then returning to Spring Training.

Skubal was one of the first players announced for Team USA, and an easy guy to hitch the wagon to, as someone whose incredible arm could easily carry the squad deep into the tournament, and most importantly, potentially neutralize the potent lineups of Japan, Venezuela and the Dominican Republic.

Considering the United States has only won the tournament they basically invented in order to pad their global athletic standing once out of five times, it’s got to be like a sour grape for USA Baseball, and something they always want to wash the taste out of their mouths, by winning again, and closing that lead held by Japan, who has won 3 of 5, and a guy like Skubal committing is a giant boon, especially since he was shortly followed by NL Cy Young winner, Paul Skenes, creating an incredibly unfair-sounding 1-2 pitching duo in a short tournament format.

But now Skubal reveals that he’s only planning to make a single start, against Great Britain of all teams in the tournament; unsurprising, once such intel was absorbed by baseball fans, it quickly turned into snarky vitriol towards the talented lefty, with people accusing him of unpatriotically going into body protect mode, since it’s clear that he’s going to be seeking out a gabillion dollar contract after the 2026 season, as he’s set to become an unrestricted free agent for the first time.

Like, in one hand, I get the importance of protecting one’s self, especially considering the last WBC saw closer Edwin Diaz blow out his knee in 2022 and miss an entire season, and injury is always on the backs of the minds of nearly every participating major leaguer.

But in the other hand, if Skubal knew that he wasn’t going to commit more than a single fucking start for Team USA, I feel like it probably would’ve been best had he just not committed to the team in the first place.  Free up the spot to someone who really wanted to put their balls on the line for the country, and is willing to make three starts if needed, which should encapsulate a group, knockout and potential final in a best-case scenario.

In a way, joining the squad but then only committing to a single appearance, against possibly the worst team in the entire tournament is tantamount to being a part of a group project in school, doing the very first assignment, but then not doing anything at all for the remainder of the project.

Look, I know my analogy game is terribly off right now, but the point is, Skubal’s shenanigans is like a shitty rug pull that gave US baseball hope, but then took it all back.  If anything, if Skubal was only going to commit to a single game, it would be best served if it were saved to be against Japan or any of the other expected powerhouses of the tournament, and save appearances against scrubs like Great Britain, Brazil or Italy for guys like the retired Clayton Kershaw or Logan Webb.

Obviously, I’d love to see Team USA win another WBC, because I don’t think Korea is going to make the runs they did like they did in 2006 and 2009 ever again, but it’s times like this where the greed and body-protect logic of professional athletes gets really fucking old.  There’s a reason why Japan has won three of the five WBCs, and there’s very little reason to believe that they’re not going to be knocking on the door of a fourth one in coming weeks.

Nobody is more impressed with mediocrity than me

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

A day ago, I got my renewed passport in the mail.  I was very impressed at the turnaround on this, seeing as how I had applied for it a mere two weeks prior.  I’d been sitting on an email reminder to renew my passport from several months ago, but mythical wife and I had been kicking the idea around to go abroad for a vacation sometime within the next year, and the last thing I wanted was to have a passport on the cusp of expiration, and it causing all sorts of preventable complication later down the line.

A little over a year ago, I applied and received passports for both of my kids, and much like my own initial passport from eons ago, it was quite the nerve-wracking process of making sure I had birth certificates, proofs of residence, clothes, boots, motorcycle, etc.  In fact, when I got my very first one, I had to actually go into Washington DC to the passport office due to some reason I can’t remember, and even that was for a temporary, one-year only passport, all so I could go to fucking Toronto, of all places.

Either way, passports for my kids was like a turnaround of four months, and I’m proud of myself for having the wherewithal to have started as early as I did, so that they would be done for the cruise that we went on just months after receiving them.

When I expressed to my friends at how pleased I was that I got my renewed passport in just two weeks, like most of the shit I say to the group chat with most of my friends, it was met with silence, and then eventually some of my wiser guys blurting out that it’s not impressive since renewals are usually faster than getting brand new passports.

Yes, that may be the case, as I recall my last renewal taking maybe 6-8 weeks, but this was fucking two.  Even the passport office dot gov website had predicted a turnaround of like, end of March, which would still be more than sufficient to my potential summer needs, but then I started getting status update emails that already had tracking numbers and an expected delivery date of February 20.

I made a joke to my friends that we could all agree that just about everything in Washington is a putrid wasteland of process, corruption and bullshit, but whatever’s going on at Passport Services, I had just gotten a renewal done and delivered in just two weeks.  But like I said, crickets.

What I’m getting at is that it’s apparent that there’s nobody in the world more impressed with mediocrity than me.  I’m so nihilistic, so jaded, and so pessimistic about the state of America and the rest of the world, that when people in the world simply perform to their baseline job descriptions, I’m fucking over the moon.

Yeah, I know that my generally droll outlook isn’t necessarily the best looking or something to be proud of, but I can’t help it.  I get so disappointed when people fail to meet my expectations, the only seemingly adequate defense mechanism to adopt is to assume utter incompetence across the board, to where when people deliver mediocrity, my mind is blown away and it brings me great joy that there are occasionally competent people in the world.

And anyone who actually does go above and beyond for me, well, I had Yelp Elite status for like the better part of eight years because I was ready and willing to review a million stars to any businesses that impressed me with such.

Needless to say, while my friends might not be impressed with a two-week turnaround for a passport renewal, I was quite elated and impressed by it.  Maybe some robots have taken over working at Passport Services, because everything else in Washington DC is steaming hot bullshit, and I can’t imagine any possible other alternative to a task being done so exceptionally, than if it were done by artificial intelligence.

It’s always going to be Springfield Mall

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

NBC Washington: non-fatal shooting incident occurs at Springfield Town Center between teenagers arguing about something reportedly nothing and inconsequential

It’s not that often that I think much about my old stomping grounds, and it’s been over a decade since the topic of Springfield Town Center Mall has been in the brog, but here we are, thanks to an eerily accurate feeding from the algorithm to me, letting me know about a shooting incident in the shopping mall that I’d wasted endless amounts of hours of my life at.

As I opined in a comment on social media, they can change the name of the joint, and they can change all the stores inside the place, but Springfield Mall will always be Springfield Mall, a place cursed and destined to be a place of underlying danger and the uneasy feeling shoppers will always have that no matter what things appear around them, they’re not entirely safe.  MS-13 beheadings and 9/11 hijacker presence have a tendency to leave their bad juju on a place, kind of like the premise of The Grudge.

Thinking back to this assessment, it’s almost a miracle that I’m alive, considering the massive amounts of danger commensurate to how much time I spent there probably having increased my mortality rate throughout my teenage years.

It’s the least surprising thing in the world to hear news of spontaneous violence erupting within the walls of Springfield Town Center considering the bones and likely jerry-rigged graves in which the place was built onto, and watching the video of the incident, it doesn’t look like much has changed over the last 10+ years of Springfield Mall’s final days and Town Center’s day-to-day operations.

Shithead teenagers loitering around the place, manifesting beefs out of absolutely nothing, and ultimately erupting into gun violence, what I saw in the video looked like it could’ve been straight out of 1999, minus the taste in fashion, and the presence of bystanders all brandishing smart phones trying to video the incident instead of you know, calling 9-1-1.

Then again, it’s no secret that among the things that carried over from the old days into the current is the physical Fairfax County Police precinct in the mall itself, because nothing says ‘we’re [not] a safe place’ than having to have local cops ready at the helm, within ear shot at any given time.

The point remains, as unfortunate it is to ever hear of gun violence in any way shape or form, it’s good that nobody was killed and the offending parties were apprehended.  But I still admit to being amused at the ironic reality that no matter how much time has passed, no matter that the name of the joint has changed, and no matter how much the insides of the shopping center has changed, nothing will ever, ever change the fact that 6500 Springfield will always be, Springfield Mall.