Tag: wwe

I am not a fan of MJF’s short reign as American Champion

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

This post could’ve just as easily been called WTF is AEW doing #413, but we’ve gone too far now, and the wheels of writing are already in motion.  But after maybe what, four or five weeks after MJF defeated Will Ospreay for the re-christened American Championship in an absolute banger of a match on Dynamite #250, he gives it right back to Ospreay at All In.

It’s funny because the WWE gets a tremendous amount of flack when they do 50/50 booking, when feuding competitors trade wins back and forth, because “it devalues” both of them having to take losses, but this is a prime example of a zero-sum gain of 50/50 booking between two guys that are expected to be torch bearers for AEW, in MJF and Will Ospreay.

Ospreay takes a loss at Dynamite #250, loses his blet to MJF, and MJF does some really, really outstanding work in the span of him turning it into the American Championship, cashing in on all sorts of cheap heat by taking the title to Mexico and Europe and going ballistic on foreign countries, drawing nuclear amounts of heat in the process.

But instead of continuing to run with this ball that had a tremendous amount of mileage still left in the tank, AEW books MJF to drop the title right back to Will Ospreay, so that MJF can go feud with Daniel Garcia, whom I like, but at the same time, now there’s nobody next in line for Will Ospreay, although I think it’s evidently clear that it’s going to be Ricochet, because Tony Khan doesn’t waste any time at caving to what he and the fans want, which is an inevitable Ospreay vs. Ricochet match.

And just like that, a mega-program between two of the company’s most mega stars is over as quick as it started, all because a notable program needed to be lit and burned for All In just because it was in London and Will Ospreay of course needs to go over in his home country.

Frankly, this is all just extremely short-sighted booking that just occurred, because MJF is probably the most protected man on the entire roster, and he had to take an L, primarily because Tony Khan waited until the last minute to start his science project, panicked and forced two of his top workers to put together a hackneyed program that resulted in both of them taking losses and swapping a belt in rapid succession.  These two guys should be built up for at least six months for a program at Revolution, or Double or Nothing, or whatever one of AEW’s show is supposed to be their grand daddy of them all.

Honestly, I have no doubt in my mind that MJF being the obnoxious asshole American could have gone several more months of him showing up in other countries to wrestle their hot stars, or show up on AEW programming and defeat non-American after non-American for the title.  Frankly, he could have carried this program on as long as he felt like carrying it, because there’s really nobody better than MJF at taking the low-hanging fruit and running with it.

I like Daniel Garcia, but there’s no chance that he could compare with Will Ospreay in carrying his end of a feud.  Ordinarily, I’d say that MJF dropping a mid-card title is really a sign of an impending promotion, but Tony Khan doesn’t seem to follow any logical rules as much as he’s always trying to swerve the audience for really no other reason than because he’s deliberately trying to swerve them for the sake of doing such.

It’s just a shame that it’s going to come at the expense of a rare MJF loss.

Dominik Mysterio has an important choice to make

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Be more like his dad Eddie Guererro Rey Mysterio, or be more like Sammy Guevara?

So I’m scrolling through theFacebook, and I come across a random photograph taken by a fan, from Summer Slam, and it’s of the part where Dominik Mysterio and Liv Morgan are embracing after Liv’s successful title defense against Rhea Ripley, whom Dom-Dom had just schemed against and screwed.  Enthralling television.

But in the photo, you can clearly see some tongue action going on between the two, and I’m thinking to myself first, that’s kind of gross because seeing anyone really tongue making out isn’t ever really attractive if I’m being honest, but then I’m thinking, hey Dominik Mysterio is actually married in real life and I bet his wife probably isn’t appreciating the liberties he’s taking in the name of putting on a show.

Most fans probably noticed that over the last two years of the Dominik and “Mami” Rhea Ripley relationship, there’s never been any real kissing or anything too affectionate shown on screen.  With kayfabe being a dead thing these days, most fans also knew that both of them were in relationships outside of the ring, Dominik married, and Rhea Ripley engaged (now married) to Buddy Matthews.

I get the impression that this was the case out of a mutual respect between all parties related, and what they did show on screen was all for show, and because Dom and Rhea are pretty talented performers, they still managed to sell it convincingly and seem pretty natural on screen.

But after seeing Dom and Liv going ham as soon as the ruse was revealed, now it seems more like the previous agreement was probably more Rhea’s idea than Dom’s, and although I imagine he’ll deny and proclaim that it’s to sell the storyline, I feel like Dom went a little heavy-handed with his actions, the way he was trying to inhale Liv Morgan into him like he were Shang Tsung sucking up her soul.

Of course it takes two to tango, and as aesthetically pleasing I find Liv Morgan, and tempting as the opportunity would seem, I get the impression she doesn’t give a fuck about Dom’s wife so much as she wants to make a moment, and was all for making out with Dom on Peacock® as hard as she could to move the needle.

It didn’t end there either, as the following Monday on RAW, the two of them were on screen together, as Finn Balor revealed the grand excommunication of both Damien Priest and Rhea Ripley from the Judgment Day, and they were just all over each other, sharing all these little pecks and smooches on camera.  Again, none of this occurred when it was Dom x Rhea, but now that it’s Dom x Liv, all bets appear to be off.

So back to the original question, I feel like Dominik Mysterio is at a personal crossroads right now, and I’m not entirely not being serious about it, because the only outcome of it really does affect personal lives in the end.

Does Dominik subscribe to the newsletter of his dad, Eddie Guerrero Rey Mysterio, and maintain a healthy work-life balance where he has a loyal wife and children at home, doesn’t stray, and resist temptation?  I know I’ve made the Eddie joke twice now, but even Eddie is a good example in this case, because he too was a faithful husband and took care of his family until the very end.

Or does Dominik subscribe to the Sammy Guevara newsletter, where his professional life begins to permeate into his personal life?  Where the ultra-talented Sammy Guevara had an emotionally charged televised proposal and engagement to his now-ex Pam, but then would rapidly embark on a relationship with a fellow wrestler, Tay Conti, and basically humiliate all parties involved publicly when he ended up dumping Pam and basically immediately marrying and knocking up Conti, and even where the fickle AEW even thought he was a shithead.

Because as it stands now, it looks like Dom hasn’t made such a distinction yet, and if he thinks kayfabe is going to be some sort of hall pass for him to suck face with Liv Morgan on television and expect to be able to go home to his actual wife and all is going to be hunky-dory, I’d wager that she’s not going to be as pleased by his choices to imbibe in the physicality with Liv when he’s gone the last few years without any televised action with Rhea.

Sensibility and the want to know everyone is in a good place dictates that Dom-Dom go the route of his dad(s), and curb it back a smidge.  But Dom is also young, Liv Morgan is also hot and seems to have no qualms with using whatever hand she’s dealt to optimally raise her stock, and I think most red-blooded males can understand the conundrum going on in his head, but only time will tell to see how the rest of this journey transpires.

Hello, L . . . GBTQ+

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

When I was 16 years old and the WWF was in the midst of their Attitude Era, business was booming, wrestling couldn’t possibly be anymore mainstream than it was, and week after week was compelling television to the demographic that clearly targeted people like me, and of similar age mindsets.

When vignettes of Val Venis began, of him announcing is impending arrival in the WWE while simultaneously pantomiming all sorts of sexual activity, it really was a holy shit moment, as in the reality that professional wrestling was going to have a porn star character, was actually going to happen.

I remember debut on RAW is WAR, against Too-Cold Scorpio, and thinking this match was going surprisingly long for a guy’s debut, and after a vicious spinning heel kick from Scorpio, I actually remember wondering if Val Venis would be among the few superstars to actually take an L in their debut, the last one I could remember being Bastion Booger way back in like 1992.

Perhaps The Big Valbowski was being too generous as the noob in the locker room.  Or maybe Too-Cold was going into business for himself a little bit seeing as how he was eventually supposed to take the L; maybe the man that Mick Foley put in writing as having the largest penis he’d ever seen in his life was a little salty that some Canadian guy was getting to portray the porn star gimmick that he felt could’ve been his.

But Val Venis did win the match, and I remember thinking how unimpressive he actually was in the ring, based on that singular match.

Eventually, he would get opportunities to redeem himself, and seeing as how the WWF roster was stacked to the gills with guys like The Rock, Mick Foley, Kurt Angle and Edge, even the mid-card was loaded with guys like the New Age Outlaws, Hardcore Holly, D’lo, X-Pac, Ken Shamrock among many others.

Not only was The Big Valbowski a fun character, gushing with charisma and cleverly-written promos, the guy actually could work too.  Needless to say, I was a fan of Val Venis.

However, it should come as no great surprise that a guy whose character was a literal porn star, there would be a ceiling for him, dictated by the rules and regulations of public decency and mostly the FCC.  In order for Val to elevate to the main event and the top of the card, the character would have to grow and evolve, and there’s really not much growth or evolution a porn star would be able to do on national television.

Eventually, due to mounting pressure from outside forces, most notably the formed Parent-Television Council, the Val Venis persona eventually made its way to the block and was soon choppy-choppy’d from the program.

As talented of a worker as he was, workrate is only half of professional wrestling, and character is the other half.  Losing a persona like Val Venis was the kiss of death, and after flops like RTC member Val Venis and then Chief Morley, he would flounder some more in TNA before his professional career came to mostly an end.

Much like lots of former wrestlers of yesteryear, Sean Morley [his real name] could’ve faded into the sunset, or among the many things a guy could do in order to stay relevant to the modern wrestling community, utilize social media to announce their existence, but also to spout horrifically right-wing propaganda and become one of the countless right-wing nuts that pollute the population.  And if you went with the latter, at what you think Val Venis has been doing in retirement, you’re absolutely right.

Which finally brings us to the point of this post’s existence; apparently The Big Valbowski’s right-wing rhetoric and how much he blathers it has ruffled a few feathers, most notably the guy who has been running his website, ValVenis.com.  I didn’t dive too far to find out the context of just how bad the rift went, or specifically what caused it, but the result of such a fallout was that the guy who had the keys to the car, has decided to turn ValVenis.com into a site that now exists in support and allyship of the LGBTQ+ community; and if there’s one major demographic that exists in the crosshairs of the hard right, it’s the LGBTQ+ community.

Unsurprisingly, The Big Valbowski is none too pleased with this development, and has supposedly pursued legal action and is suing the webmaster to try to get the reigns to his website back.  I don’t care enough to have an opinion on whom is going to possibly come out of the legal battle with any advantage, but my knee-jerk thought is that webmaster probably has the upper hand, seeing as how they’re probably the one who registered, paid and are actually the ones still maintaining the virtual property.

Seeing as how the WWE hasn’t cared enough about the Val Venis character to bother renewing and retaining the IP, I imagine if Sean Morley secures the copyright for himself, he might have a leg to stand on, but in the meantime, I love that the Webmaster has turned “VAL VENIS” into a really reaching anagram of LGBTQ+ support in a long-shot way to justify using the domain for its current purpose:

VAL : Valued Allies of LGBTQ+
VENIS: Vital Educational & NonJudgemental Informational Services

Sean Morley didn’t really have that long of a career, but he kind of existed in the era when professional wrestlers were free-spending jocks who blew thousands of dollars on drinking, drugs and ring rats, and aren’t the athletic nerds of today who have gamified investing and earning, so I have no idea what his current financial status is.  But if I had to guess, it’s more towards the former, and I don’t imagine he has the means to get into a legal battle against a website, fighting over the web domain of a former wrestling porn star in an actual court of law.

The bottom line is as it stands now, Val Venis is in 100% owned status, and is a precautionary tale of the importance of being good to your webmasters, especially if you yourself don’t have any keys to the house.

I don’t think AEW knows what Unified means

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

As I was doom scrolling before going to sleep, I came across a video clip of Dustin Rhodes and what appeared to be two members of the Von Erich family, winning the Ring of Honor Six-Man Tag championships at some Ring of Honor show.  I wouldn’t know which one, because ever since Tony Khan bought the entire promotion, it hasn’t held my interest beyond the one Final Battle show I went to a few years ago, and fuck if I’m going to pay actual money to see a TK production.

The thing is, up until seeing this title change, I had no idea that the ROH Six-Man championship was still in existence.  I was under the impression that in an attempt to reduce the sheer volume of blets in AEW/ROH, that when the Bang Bang Gang* defeated The Acclaimed and “unified” the ROH Six-Man blets with the AEW Trios blets, six blets would be reduced to three.

*The amount of turrible that this name is, is unprecedented, and even in a carny, smarky bubble that AEW and their fans exist in, this stands out as that bad

Naturally, instead they ended up with nine total blets to cart around, as Jay White, Colten and Austin Gunn would lug around each an ROH Six-Man blet, the gaudy pink-strapped Acclaimed-version Trios blet, as well as the OG black, blue and gold AEW Trios blet.  There exists enough physical blets in AEW and ROH combined for every single talent that appears on screen to have one.

Anyway though, the whole point of a unified championship is the consolidate the number of titles, to increase the prestige of a singular championship, and despite the fact that there were at one point nine blets to signify the Unified Trios championship, the reality is that the Acclaimed-pink blets and the ROH Six-Man blets should have been taken off television.

Recently, whether it was legitimate or kayfabe, Jay White was injured, and taken off television; I’m hoping it was the latter, and that an injury angle is what was needed in order to break Jay White away from the Gunns and Juice Robinson, so that a guy that hasn’t been even a full year removed from being the IWGP World Champion can actually reset his trajectory in AEW, instead of being like Kazuchika Okada and being used at a fraction of his true capabilities and instead stashed with C-tier talents and meaningless television segments.

As a result of White being out, the Bang Bang Gang was stripped of the Unified Trios championship, and forced to fight The Patriarchy for the right to win them back.  And with their top worker out, Christian and his cronies would pick up the win, the titles, and hopefully he will elevate the Trios blets as well as he had elevated the TNT championship.

The thing is, what everyone failed to mention, and/or I was never made aware of because I don’t pay that much attention to AEW/ROH, is that the ROH Six-Man championship was un-unified just like that, and it wasn’t until I saw Dustin Rhodes and the Von Erichs winning them did I even learn that they were even active championships again.

Look, I’m fine with championships being resurrected when the need arises, but the thing with this convoluted journey of Six-Man/Trios championships is that it all happened within the span of a calendar year and basically ended up in the same place in which it started:

  • August 2023: The Acclaimed win the AEW Trios Championship
  • January 2024: Jay White and the Gunns win the ROH Six-Man Championship
  • April 2024: Bang Bang Gang defeats The Acclaimed, becomes the Unified Trios Champions
  • July 2024: On account of Jay White’s injury, Bang Bang Gang are stripped of the Unified Trios Championship; unmentioned, the unification is severed, and both sets of championships are rendered vacant
  • July 20, 2024: Christian and the Patriarchy win the AEW Trios Championship
  • July 27, 2024: Dustin Rhodes and the Von Erichs win the ROH Six-Man Championship

AEW/ROH doesn’t need 35 championship blets floating around, and yet they had the opportunity to pare down for the sake of the others, but instead they added more, and when they had a second chance to consolidate again, they only reduced out the custom-variants of the Acclaimed, and ended up with two different six-man titles in the end.

What all this amounts to is the sheer frivolity and unimportance of six-man tag team wrestling, if their championships are going to be monkeyed around with and passed around like a blunt at a rap concert. 

It’s funny, because the WWE often got flack for their dismissive attitude towards tag team wrestling, to the point where when AEW came into existence, they made it a high priority point to emphasize tag team wrestling, because of the Young Bucks and FTR.  But whereas the WWE shit on tag team wrestling, AEW apparently has decided to basically create a six-man tag division, so that they could have something to shit on as well.

I like to imagine phone calls between Kazuchika Okada and Shinsuke Nakamura

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

A few days ago, the wrestling internet made a classic big deal over the breaking revelation that the WWE’s Shinsuke Nakamura picked up NJPW-but working programs for-AEW Minoru Suzuki from the airport and hung out together.  OMG the scandal, one of them is definitely jumping ship, etc, etc.  Internet wrestling fans are special like that.

A few months ago, there was some buzz surrounding the free agency of Kazuchika Okada, as he was wrapping up his obligations in Japan, that seeing as how he didn’t re-sign with NJPW, it was a foregone conclusion that he was definitely coming to America, but the question really was, the WWE or AEW?  I mean, if I were a betting man, I’d have put a sizeable amount on AEW, but the thought of him going to the WWE was plausible enough to where many began to analyze the sudden push of Nakamura into a program against Cody Rhodes, as evidence of the willingness of the WWE to give Japanese guys high profile opportunities.

Regardless, Okada went to AEW, and Nakamura’s push came to about as sudden of a stop as it had started, but after watching the main event to AEW’s super television show aptly titled Blood and Guts, where Okada, who was previously regarded to be basically NJPW’s John Cena over the last 15 years, was relegated to this glorified hardcore brawl, where the man was undoubtedly out of his element, and performed as such too.

The same Okada, who basically had some of the greatest wrestling matches not just in modern history, but arguably of all-time, was hanging around inside double steel cages, trying to avoid being on camera as much as possible.  All around him were thumbtacks, steel chairs, ladders, and one of his most notable moments in the match was when Swerve Strickland put a staple in his middle finger, when he was merely just trying to flip the bird because he’s an evil heel and that’s what bad guys do.

Eventually, he would be “taken out” during a commercial break that didn’t even get JR’s Restaurant Quality Picture-in-Picture™ and was hiding for the remaining minutes of the shitshow, and it goes without saying that there’s no single part of me that doesn’t feel that AEW is wasting and squandering the talents of a guy like Kazuchika Okada (and Mercedes Mone but that’s a different story).

I like to imagine a scenario where after a debacle like this one, one random evening, Okada calls up Nakamura, assuming that they’re friends because they’re both Japanese, both professional wrestlers, and have a positive relationship built when they were both in NJPW.

Okada asks Shinsuke if he saw his match at Blood and Guts, and of course Nakamura didn’t, because he’s on the road and didn’t have a chance to see it.  Okada goes into mansplain mode about how intense it was, how into the marky AEW crowd was, and all the cool shit they got to do in the ring.  Meanwhile, Nakamura responds with an unimpressed mmhmm, while he describes how he had to lose to Logan Paul at a house show in Sheboygan, Wisconsin in the second match of the night, but at least he didn’t have to land on any thumbtacks or have his finger staple gunned.

They proceed to talk about their respective lives in their respective promotions, where they both wax poetic about how they were the literal kings of NJPW, and how they’re basically organizational filler in America.  But Okada gets defensive and talks about how he’s a champion, Nakamura rebuts that AEW/ROH has like 53 active championship belts.  Okada talks about how he’s featured on television as opposed to Nakamura, but Shinsuke says he’d rather not be on television than be portrayed like a clown when he was a god in Japan just four months ago.

And then Nakamura then goes on the offensive to talk about how even though he’s an afterthought right now, he still works a soft schedule, gets to travel internationally on the WWE’s dime, and gets to experience a lot of the world, all while not having to be put in uncomfortable clusterfucks and wrestle on thumbtacks and staples.

Okada responds with the likely reality that he makes way more money than Nakamura does, but then the older and wiser Shinsuke responds that they’ve both already made big fortunes in wrestling already, at what point does all these extra dollars even matter?

And with the Okada rage hangs up the phone, while Shinsuke Nakamura scoffs and laughs at the dead air suddenly at his ear.

This is the kind of bullshit that goes on through my head these days when I’m not in dad-mode, and this is probably why I can’t even begin to start making my life’s fortune on some stupendous side hustle that would undoubtedly take off to the moon if I could just get off my ass and stop brogging about professional wrestling fan fiction.

TIL: Mercedes Mone’s creative control clause

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

I didn’t watch AEW’s Forbidden Door (3) pay-per-view because one, who in the world actually pays for a ppv anymore these days, two, the card seemed entirely way too predictable, and I called like 90% of the card correctly and 100% of the singles matches, and three, there were probably 3-5 other things that I’d rather have done with that time in my life instead.

Naturally, as stated, the card was ridiculously predictable, and much like the years before this one, almost all of the New Japan guys and all of the CMLL guys from Mexico took the losses in their matches, and for some reason, AEW keeps feeding Orange Cassidy to the next big thing in New Japan, with it being the very obvious Zack Sabre, Jr. who was one of two NJPW guys to actually come out with a W.

For obvious business reasons, it was a foregone conclusion that Jon Moxley was going to drop the belt to Tetsuya Naito, because fuck if NJPW would allow a guy in another promotion to continuously hold their top prize any longer than this, but good for Mox to be able to lay claim that he’s held World championships in the WWE, AEW and NJPW among numerous other titles he’s held in his career.

But if there were any other guarantees on the night, it was that Mercedes Mone was without any question, going to defeat Stephanie Vaquier and walk out with the NJPW Strong women’s championship, and be a double champion.  I mean really, I don’t like to bet on things, but if I knew of a safe and legal way to gamble, I would’ve felt comfortable dropping like $500 Mercedes was going to take the W in their match.  I mean the NJPW Strong women’s championship was basically created for her, and if not for a Shrek-green Willow Nightingale legit injuring her, she probably would’ve been the NJPW Strong champion when she debuted with AEW.

Back to the title of this post though, it was afterward through scuttlebutt did I learn that Mercedes Mone actually has creative control baked in to her AEW contract.  Obviously, this doesn’t look like anything to anyone who doesn’t follow professional wrestling, but basically it means that Mercedes Mone has legitimate legal veto power over the way she is booked in the company.

In other words, if she shows up to the arena one day, and Tony Khan says to her, “Hey Mercedes, I’m going to have you lose tonight to Kris Statlander and drop the TCM belt to her” she could actually say “no, that doesn’t work for me brother” and force TK to go back to the drawing board and book a better scenario for her, and there’s really nothing that he can do about it.  He can’t flex his position as owner of the company or that he’s the boss, because he gave her creative control in her contract.

For context, there are only two other instances I can think of where wrestlers had any degree of creative control in their contracts, which was Hulk Hogan during his time in WCW, where he had full creative control, and where he has been alleged and accused of various instances where he utilized it in order to maintain a high-stature within the company.  The other was Bret Hart, who had a degree of creative control baked into his WWE contract if he were ever to be on his way out, so that the company couldn’t bury him on the way out and make him look like a putz going to another employer.

Hart really didn’t get to use his control due to the Montreal Screwjob, but Hogan, as mentioned was alleged to have flexed his power numerous times throughout his WCW tenure, and there are many stories and accounts out there from former colleagues and wrestlers who claim that he did.

What I’m getting at is that it’s a really dangerous sword to give to just anyone, because there’s never any guarantee that someone with it, won’t just go into business for themselves and ensure that they’re always in a position of looking strong and prominent, and suppress the rise of any potential partners to draw money with.

And yet, Mercedes Mone has creative control in her deal.  I don’t care enough to dive deeper to find out just how much of it she has, or what if any conditionals exist with the deal, but the point is she still has it, and I can’t help but feel that that’s a really dangerous thing to give to a person like her, whom for all intents and purposes I do like as a performer, but I also think she’s kind of a spoiled entitled brat who has demonstrated a tendency to cry foul and walk away when things haven’t looked too great for her character’s portrayal.

I mean, even before I found out that she had creative control, I would’ve bet a large sum of money that she was going to beat Vaquier, but now the perception is murky on if it happened because it was the best business decision, or if it happened because she pulled her CC card and made it happen.

Even before finding out she had CC, I had already fantasy booked her future where she would undoubtedly go on a blet collecting saga, because that seems to be the well that AEW and TK seem to repeatedly dip into in order to cement guys as legends, like they did with Kenny Omega, and also did with FTR, and it seems like they’re doing the same with Mercedes Mone.

Without question, she’ll probably collect one of the women’s titles from Ring of Honor, whether it’s taking down Athena for the ROH’s women’s title, or perhaps she’ll keep her sights on television titles, and be the one to part the ROH Women’s TV title from Billie Starkz.  And then when Stephanie Vaquier comes back for a rematch, she’ll probably demand that it can’t be for free, and that she needs to put her CMLL Women’s championship on the line for a shot to get the NJPW Strong women’s blet back, and then collect a fourth belt.

And as long as AEW has their open door policy with NJPW, this keeps the chances alive that Mercedes will go on to re-capture the IWGP Women’s championship, or maybe she’ll stealthily slide her way into the partnering Stardom promotion, and start hoovering up blets there too.

Eventually, it culminates with her setting her sights on Toni Storm and the AEW Women’s championship, and despite the fact that I think Storm has been the legitimately best thing in the entire company, all it takes is a little bit of flexing of that CC clause, and she’ll complete the god-tier run of collecting blets.

Would it be best for business?  Probably not.  But when you give an inmate creative control, you put yourself in a position to where that doesn’t matter if that’s what they want.

And as a fan, that wouldn’t work for me.  Brother.

I think the Bloodline has DJ Tanner Wrestling’d

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Only the longest of my zero readers know that DJ Tanner Wrestling-ing is my personal evolution to jumping the shark, and in the case of this particular topic it’s relevant since this is yet another post about, professional wrestling.

Anyway, over the weekend the WWE did their best to surprise the Universe by introducing Tanga Loa into the company, when he interfered during the Bloodline vs. Kevin Owens and Randy Orton tag match.  A few weeks ago, they had brought in Tama Tonga to join forces with Solo Sikoa, whom the storyline has as being the guy now assuming control over the Bloodline, with the long-deserved hiatus of Roman Reigns after Wrestlemania. 

And with that, both members of the Guerillas of Destiny (GoD) have made their way to the WWE after a long and fruitful career overseas in NJPW.  Both have aligned with Solo, and are representing the new age of the Bloodline.  I doubt that they’ll still be called GoD once the dust settles from their arrival, but to those that are familiar with them, they’ll always be GoD.

Personally, I’m high on GoD, and loved their work in Japan.  It was the highlight of the evening when NJPW had a tour stop in Atlanta, where the main event was the Guerillas winning the IWGP Heavyweight Tag Team championships, and above all else, I love that they’re the son and the adopted son of the baddest man on the planet, Haku.  That alone gives them a 10 in toughness, because I can’t imagine anyone raised by Haku would be anything short of being the polar opposite of a pussy.

I am excited for their arrival in the E and the sheer potential they bring by both being in the company, but at the same time, I still can’t help but have this feeling that they’ve caused the whole trajectory of the Bloodline to DJ Tanner Wrestle, mainly because of the simple fact that they’re not actual bloodline to the Anoa’i family.

In fact, they’re not even Samoan, but Tongan.  I know that white people can’t tell Asians and island boys apart, and there are a lot of similarities between the cultures, but the fact of the matter is that Tama Tonga and Tanga Loa aren’t related to the Anoa’i family nor are they Samoan, so having them be a part of the Bloodline seems kind of shark-jumpy in my opinion.

I know that Haku is super tight with many Anoa’i members, and as Rikishi once said, us island boys have to stick together, but it does feel like a little bit of a cop out to just slap GoD into the Bloodline and hope that nobody questions the genealogy here just because they’re all from island origins.

Sure, they did it already with Sami Zayn being the Honorary Uce, but the difference here is that they weren’t trying to hide the fact that he wasn’t Samoan and related to an Anoa’i, and I’m not saying that they might not do the same with GoD, but so far, they also haven’t made any attempt to dispel it either.  I have this suspicion that unless they get some heat from any Polynesian groups, who demand specificity, the WWE is just going to hope that fans at home assume that GoD are Anoa’i and don’t question it.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m stoked that GoD are now a part of the E.  They will inject a viable tag team into the division of whichever show they land on, and I’m sure fans are already salivating at the idea of an inevitable GoD vs. the Usos matchup, because a Bloodline civil war does seem like it’s the obvious end game coming once Roman Reigns’ vacation is up.

It’s just details matter to me, and two guys whom aren’t even blood-related themselves, joining up with a faction called the Bloodline to which they’re not related to, seems a little DJ Tanner Wrestling-ey in my opinion.  I get why they did it, and honestly from their perspective, as far as being fast-tracked to the main event and making money, they’re probably not sweating it, but it doesn’t change the fact that the execution of it, holistically as a whole, does seem forced and just a little bit DJ Tanner Wrestling-ey.  Creative might surprise me and spin a magnificent story, as they did over the last two years of Roman’s reign, but seeing as how they blew the wad at Mania, I’m not optimistic that this long-term story will be worth the wait if all the moving parts happen in the manner that I think they will.