Tag: mass effect

Getting old sucks

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

I didn’t play Mass Effect 1 until Mass Effect 2 came out.  Needless to say, I was a bit late onto the ME2 train, and even then I ended up sitting on the game for about three months until I started playing it because I literally had absolutely nothing else to do on a weekend.  Ultimately, it became my favorite game evar, seriously, even surpassing any and all of the Resident Evil games that I’m also very enamored with, due to the strength of its fun game play, compelling story, and brilliant story telling.

Upon completion of ME2, my initial thoughts were “man, I can’t wait for Mass Effect 3 to come out!  I’m going to pre-order that shit, and get it on release day, and if I’m working then, take that day off!”

Yeah no, none of that shit actually happened.  ME3 has been out for 24 hours now, I do not have it yet, I did not pre-order it, and despite the fact that there is a GameSlut within walking distance from my office, I have no plans of picking up a copy of it yet.  Because, frankly, I can’t find any time to actually play ME3 any time soon.  Mostly, due to the fact that I am in fact, getting old.

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As a whole, 2010 sucked. Good Riddance.

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

I often think it is cliche the way people sum up entire years, this time of year, but then again, it’s so often done when things aren’t very good.  I can be fortunate to say that I haven’t really had too many bad years as wholes, and the last one that genuinely comes to mind is back in like 2002.  With all that in mind, in the pessimistic world we live in, I suppose it simply is easier to blabber about something when it’s more like a trainwreck than a sappy, warm, feel-good story.

In a nutshell, 2010 has sucked great big, gigantic, sweaty goat balls, overall.  I’m ecstatic to see that it’s mercifully coming to a close, and I’m praying that 2011 treats me, and treats Jen a whole lot better than 2010 did, because I’m not sure if I’ll have enough black hairs left to turn white by the end of next year if this shit keeps up.  With great trepidation, I clench my anoos, fearing that there’s still time for more discouraging, cringe-inducing bullshit to occur, and as evidenced by recent events, there’s no such thing as coasting to the finish.

But not to say that 2010 was 100% pure rubbish.  There were a few good things that happened this year.  And to start off this conclusive post on a positive note, let’s get the good shit out of the way so I can talk about all the shitty shit that happened that most people are more intrigued about anyway:

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IT’S REAL

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Imagine coming home one day, and the power went out, so the electronic garage door opener isn’t working.  Because you’re accustomed to entering through the garage, you typically don’t carry keys to the front door.  Now that the garage has been incapacitated, how do you get into your house?  No problem.  Squirt a little omni-gel onto the locks, and voila – shit pops unlocked, you’re free to enter.

Imagine one day, your dad kicks the bucket, and among his estate is a locked safe, that nobody has the combination to.  Smear a little omni-gel on it, and the mystery is solved.

Imagine playing against me in Left 4 Dead, and get so frustrated at repeatedly getting beaten to death by me, that you throw your Xbox controller on the ground, and break it.  Instead of going out to Wal-Mart and dropping $40 on a new controller, coat it in omni-gel, and be back on the horse to pwnage in no time.

Imagine driving down I-285 through Forest Park, and spontaneously getting caught in the middle of a gang fight, and your car takes massive gun fire, catches fire, and begins to reach critical mass.  As soon as you can reach safety, pull off on the shoulder, and have your tech-specialist start pouring some omni-gel all over the car, and in no time, you’ll be back on the road to the next relay exit.

I can’t believe that omni-gel really exists!

You have received a new message at your private terminal, Commander

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Last night, I finally beat Mass Effect 2.  It is officially the finest game that I’ve ever played.

As much as I love and play the hell out of Left 4 Dead and all the Resident Evil games, I can’t honestly say that I like them more than Mass Effect 2.  They’re either too one-dimensional, or their stories are too cut-and-concrete, one direction only, whereas Mass Effect provides options, paths, and a large variety of factors that tweak and customize the game into the player’s choice.

But in the end, the biggest factor for me is the storytelling of Mass Effect 2 that put it above and beyond from any other game.  Sure, a lot of it has to do with the personalities of the players themselves, but the fact that the game can change on a whim based on the decisions of a player’s emotions or thinking is brilliance.  The raw emotions conveyed by the characters and supporting cast of the game are a testament to the superb acting behind the story.

I can’t wait to play through it again, but as my imported super-heel character from the first Mass Effect, and I’m going to go all renegade up on the galaxy.

 

I just want to play Mass Effect 2 without glare!

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

The last time I checked my bank account, the funds were a little on the sparse side, so I told myself that maybe it would be best if I simply stayed home this weekend.  Play some Mass Effect 2, watch some baseball, and relax.  Save my money, especially since I’m out of contract work again at the moment.

Upon sitting down to play some ME2, I realize that I cannot really fully enjoy the game, because of the gratuitous amount of glare that my big screen is getting from the kitchen windows.  And since Jen and I have more or less neglected to get any curtains for these windows, the following is the measures that I have to take in order to alleviate the situation just a little bit, at least to where I can actually enjoy the game again.

And then when I got the mail later on in the day, there are two paychecks waiting for me.  Somewhere down the line, I didn’t receive a paycheck for an entire week’s worth of work and it went completely unnoticed.  So now, my supposed sparse funds don’t seem to concerning anymore.

I guess I’m a tool now

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Now it’s obvious that my current preference in what I do with my hair is pretty much summed up in a fairly erratic, somewhat controlled spikiness to it.  My mom hates it, those friends who have bothered to comment upon it have said they think it’s hip and cool, and most importantly, I’m fairly happy with it.  In the past, I used hair gel to spike it, to which it would gradually fade as they day progressed, and my hair would revert back to a limp fluff.  I moved onto this styling putty that my hair cutting lady used on me once after a cut, which seemed to be more effective, and sure enough it lasts a little bit longer, but by day’s end, it’s the same result.

I saw a commercial one day for a product that was different than the others, and I have to admit that I was intrigued.  Problem was, it was an AXE product, and as anyone who watches a modicum of television knows that AXE products are geared and targeted to the douchebag market of men, since most of them are the most narcissistic and conscious about their appearances.  I don’t know what that says about me, but I do like to make somewhat of an effort to appease myself, and maybe some others.

But anyway, I end up getting this AXE “messy look” stuff, which has the consistency of wax, but once you put it in your hair, well . . . It’s 1:04 am at the time I’m taking to actually write this, and my hair is still somewhat puffed up and spiky to when I originally did it at 8:15 am in the morning.  Fuckin’ incredible.

Now I know that’s about the gayest thing in the world for me to write about, boasting about an AXE hair product, but hey, if it gets the gears of writing moving, then so be it.

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