In light of all the heat that Taco Bell is under for the allegations that their “beef” isn’t really 100% completely beef, all I really have to say is, who cares?

I will continue to eat Taco Bell food as I see fit, because I simply like Taco Bell food.  I don’t give a shit if it’s not 100% beef, as it’s debatable to the authenticity of any foods not prepared by yourself, since you don’t know what’s going on behind the doors of the kitchens of the world.  But most importantly, I find Taco Bell food tasty, and as the title says, I don’t really care if they secretly have been using ground human cadaver to fill the gaps in the meat, because I’d still continue to eat it.  In fact, I’d probably eat more, to assert my position as higher on the food chain than the typical human being.

The best part of this whole debacle is that reading about it on the internet, the hordes of the morally self-superior are out in droves, detesting Taco Bell, and the fast food industry as if their own bodies were Edens or Utopias of their own accord.  How they think they’re so above legitimate business and those who like occasional fast food, in favor for all their bullshit beliefs and opinions.  Yet, if even just half of these hypocrites are the stereotypical smarmy internet commenters, than they’re also the ones craving a gordita when they’ve been out drinking wine or PBR with their snooty friends, smoking cloves or pot, and probably doing far worse to their own bodies than I am by indulging in a beefy crunch burrito once or twice a week.

What do Taco Bell and Chick-Fil-A have in common?  They’re both fast food.  Yet CFA is seemingly absolved of doing any harm despite being crazy religious cultists that produce some magnificent chicken products, but Taco Bell is the anti-christ because of allegations confirming what everyone’s already aware of – that their beef isn’t really 100% beef.

Bunch of fuckin’ hypocrites, everyone.  I’m totally going to get a beefy crunch burrito tomorrow.  I crave this, beef or no beef.  I’ll imagine it to be human meat, and enjoy it further while I sink my teeth into it.

There’s a time in every man’s (or woman’s) life where they watch something very graphic, disturbing, unusual (usually some fucked-up porn), and they can’t take their eyes off of it. And when it’s finally over, the man stands up and then realizes that he has, an erection (women, the horny equivalent). Despite the unfathomable visuals just seen, somewhere, unconsciously, it appeals to some deep-down carnal, primal desires, manifesting into an unexpected arousal.

I call bullshit to anyone I know who says this has never happened to them.

Today, jupe sends me this link for this video of Four Loko Chili. And watching through this abomination creation and subsequent consumption of this dietary nightmare, my mind was telling me “jesus christ” but my stomach was letting me know that somewhere in my digestive system, is a food boner popping up. Deep down, I want to be friends with these guys so I could partake in such epic culinary creations.

It’s not even the fact that Four Loko is mentioned in this that made it interesting, in fact, I could very well do without any more Four Loko in my entire life for the matter. But everything prior to the incorporation of the Four Loko would be something I would totally be down trying, and willing to stuff my face with. It’s completely the opposite direction that any normal human being should be headed, but I find that eventually, the food boner must be dealt with.