Yes, we are going to talk about poop

In the very first Final Fantasy, Warmech was an enemy that could be randomly encountered on the long sky bridge preceding the fourth elemental fiend, Tiamat. Warmech was the strongest non-boss in the game, as it had a nuclear blast attack that attacked your entire party for a tremendous amount of damage, as well as health regeneration, lots of armor and strong physical damage output.

Subsequently, it rewarded you as if it were one of the elemental fiends if you defeat it, but the existence of Warmech was one-part easter egg, being a high-tech opponent in a world of fantasy, one-part completionist challenge, being such a difficult adversary, and one-part nasty surprise, because encountering one can only happen at a very inopportune time, right before another major boss fight.

It was deduced that the chances of encountering a Warmech on the sky bridge was approximately 3/64; which equates to roughly 5% of the time, but if you’re unlucky like me, you somehow manage to run into Warmech almost every time.

Anyway, there’s a sky bridge in my place of employment.

And there’s a Warmech that patrols it.

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Time to talk about 90 Day Fiance – again

A picture is worth a thousand words

It’s that time of year again, when the greatest network in the history of television, TLC decides to trot out the biggest train wreck of a television show again for another season, 90 Day Fiance.  Long story short, pathetic American singles get engaged to people from other countries, and via the K-1 Visa, bring them to America, where they then have 90 days to either get married, or the mail order spouses have to go back to their respective countries.

Anyway, before I eventually start posting about season 3, I wanted to touch base with the recently aired where are they now special they released in regards to the couples of season 2.  Most notably, like most fans of the show, they wanted to know what happened between Danielle and Mohamed, easily the most polarizing couple in the show’s brief existence.

It should also be worth mentioning that in this follow-up special, two couples declined participation this time; combined with the follow-up from season 1, in both seasons, the dudes who married Filipino women have declined participation in the follow-ups, as both Louis/Aya and now Brett/Daya have dodged the prying eyes of inquiring viewers, leading to the probably conclusion that they were shams and that they didn’t work out.  Shocking.

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Love it

TL:DR: Uzbekistan Airlines announces new policy that involves weighing passengers.

As someone who has missed a flight before, because the aircraft reached weight capacity before I could even set foot on it, I’m okay with this.  I’m not just okay with this, I really, really love this idea.

As much flack as Uzbekistan gets for being basically a third-world country out in the middle of nowhere, where nobody would even know its name if not for Borat, their national airline sure did something progressive that I wish the rest of the world would consider, but obviously will not, for an obvious myriad of reasons.

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Some words for the fallen

It’s been a rough stretch for the wrestling industry this summer.  Within the last 60 days, two iconic names of the business have passed away, in Dusty Rhodes and now Rowdy Roddy Piper.  Given the fact that the life expectancy for males in the United States is at roughly 80 years old now, it is accurate to say that at 69 and 61 years old respectively, both Dusty and Piper left the world too soon, which is pretty much the epitomal statement made whenever any wrestler passes these days.  The lifestyle of the business, especially back when those guys were touring towns, was quite self-destructive, and it would be a bigger surprise if the causes of their deaths weren’t aided in some way or fashion by drugs or substance abuse.

I didn’t write anything publicly when Dusty Rhodes died, but now that Piper has so quickly followed, I think it’s a decent time to put some words down, because ultimately, I felt the same way about both guys, and it’s quite easier to turn this into something of a post that I’m hoping has some substance to it.

The truth is, I was never really a fan of either Dusty Rhodes or Roddy Piper.  This doesn’t mean that I don’t care about their deaths, far from it; they’re both unfortunate and absolutely horrible for the families that they left behind, but at the same time, I don’t see any reason to pretend like I was ever a big fan of either wrestler when they were still active.  Nor did I see any point of waxing poetic about great they were in the business, because I frankly don’t agree to such as fervently as many other wrestling fans do.

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The worst kind of postponing

Long story short: Georgia woman on death row, scheduled to be executed on February 25, 2015 lives to see another few days on account of inclement weather postponing the execution.

This is of course, the woman I brogged about almost two weeks ago, whose requested last meal consisted of some Burger King Whoppers and a whole shitload of buttermilk and buttermilk products, and I accused of basically trying to turn herself into a Left 4 Dead boomer.  So that her goal was to get fat, bloated, and full of gross disgusting waste for her to expel upon expiration, in an attempt to get the final laugh against the legal system that saw fit to put her to death for murdering her husband nearly 20 years ago.

Anyway, I can’t help but feel that this had to have been a devastating blow to the boomer-to-be here.  Sure, there’s the perspective of that she’s going to get a few extra days before the re-scheduled execution, but to me, that’s a few extra days to wallow in misery and postponed dread of maybe possibly having accepted death, only for it to be drug out for another four days.  After all, the state did deny her final bid for clemency, I can’t imagine that a few extra days is going to make anyone change their minds.

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When creative parodying strikes

I once saw a meme image that stated “your shirt says UFC but your body says KFC.”  Bahahahaha.

I laughed about it heartily.

There’s a guy at my gym that is an obvious resolutioner, and I’m pretty perceptive and good at recognizing people at places that I go regularly.  To this resolutioner’s credit, he has been coming at least once a week for the last three now, but that is still no indication that he might vanish come February, but the thing is, that there are two things that I noticed about this guy:

  1. 100% of his “working out” is spent in cable crossovers.  Whether anything that can be done with cables, he’s doing with cables.  Sometimes he’ll jump up and grab the cross beam and try to do some pull ups, but literally 100% of his time in the gym is spent amidst the cables.  Naturally, no leg workouts occur here, either.
  2. He always wears this pair of TAPOUT shorts.  Sometimes in conjunction with a TAPOUT shirt.

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The inadvertent diet

By now, anyone reading this is pretty well aware that I go to the gym on a regular basis.  But obviously, the gym alone is never enough when it comes to physical improvement, otherwise I would probably have a physique that was resembling more to Ricky Martin instead of Ricky Gervais.  This is the case because in spite of how much I work out, I’m fairly lax when it comes to eating, because food is awesome and I love food.  I’m not saying I will dine at solely all-you-can-eat buffets (anymore), but I have a fond affinity for burritos, barbecue and beer, and I have no intention of giving them up anytime soon.

I exercise so that I can eat.

However, I’m not going to say that I couldn’t stand to improve physically, because:

  • I am a single guy, and single guys that are in better shape tend to have more success in romantic pursuits than guys that are fat miserable slobs
  • Physical improvement can only lead to a higher quality standard of living
  • Yes, I prioritized the pursuit of women over improved physical well-being, because that’s kind of where I’m at with my life, currently

That being said, because I’m also a supportive friend and roommate, I decided to embark on a mission to try and eat better with Jen.

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