Photos: Run For Your Lives! Starring Justin Timberlake*

*not really Justin Timberlake

I wish I could have taken my camera along with me to take pictures during the whole ordeal, but it’s good that I didn’t. Between the mud, water, and the constant risk of biting it, it probably wouldn’t have made it. Not that there would have really been any time to take any pictures what with the constant sprinting and escaping from the zombies there was the whole time.

In the photos, you’ll see some photographs of the relentless traffic jams to get to just the parking lot, the parking lot itself, where no less than 25 cars got stuck right in front of my eyes, the before, and the bloody aftermath, and cleanup process. Good times, but man, I gotta reiterate how much work lies ahead for this activity’s future endeavors.

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I Ran For My Life and survived the entire experience

I finished the race in __:__:__, because I didn’t bother to check nor wait for the time results to update before it got so cold that my company and I opted to leave.

I had two flags left (out of three).  I was unaware that I had two, since I was convinced that a zombie had gotten my second one in the same area where I lost my first one, so I played the entire second half of the race as if I had one flag left; very defensively, and took my dear sweet time in order to conserve energy for dodging zombies as not to lose my last flag.

Although I successfully made it through the entire race with flags intact, designating me a “survivor,” I’m not going to boast about how I owned this event, and how I made a bunch of zombies look like Lucy and Ethel, bumbling around trying to catch me, because that’s certainly far from how it went.  I was very lucky to survive, and I was very unprepared.  Really unprepared.

Let’s start from the beginning.

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Excitement in the air

It started last night, when it became apparent that my ghost town of a little Days Inn was well occupied suddenly. This morning at complimentary continental breakfast, were several obvious-purposed persons, doing what I had in mind; get fueled up and get prepared for the zombie run.  Upon speaking with a few of them, most seem to be from New Jersey, New York and Pennsylvania, as I’d imagine anyone who lives in Virginia or fuckingMaryland is probably just going to commute it.

But no make mistake, as much as I’d like to have thought I was the only zombie runner staying in this place, regardless of the “official” accommodations in Edgewood, fuckingMaryland, but I’m clearly not.  That’s not a bad thing though, seeing other people here for it has awakened some excitement within me, and 1 p.m. can’t get here soon enough.  All this unknown and anticipation is making me stir-crazy.

Mildly perturbed

Lately, I’ve been a little irritable.  A little bit of it has to do with daily nuisances that come with having several pets in the home, and a significantly large bit has to do with a scenario that could be really good or really bad, depending on what happens in the process. Regardless, it’s filled with the unknown, and I don’t really like too much of the unknown right in front of me.

More of it has to do with a lot of the anxiety of the unknown that stands in front of me this weekend, as I will embark on an adventure to prove my capabilities in surviving a simulated zombie apocalypse, when I challenge Run For Your Lives. I don’t know what to expect, and this concerns me, because I’m a very competitive person, and I want very much to succeed at “surviving” the run.  More unknown, and it has me a little on edge.

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Incredible

When I was little, and growing up in the dairy farmlands of Harrisonburg, nobody in that hicksville had any idea what a Korean person was.  All through elementary school, people always gave me the “are you Chinese or Japanese?” schtick, like a real-life King of the Hill.  When I said no to both, most people were absolutely baffled, and had no idea of what possible alternatives there could be to Chinese or Japanese people.

A long while ago, I wrote about a how a kid in my neighborhood apparently thought I was Spanish, and said “hola” to me.  Throughout the last few months, this kid has seen me a few times during my morning jogs, and has said “hola” to me on all those instances.  Because I’m not Spanish, I do not respond ever.

Just the other night, while I was out on my evening jog, I ran by two little batarians, to which one of them said “hola” to me.  Seeing as how I was now right next to the kid, I finally said, “I’m not Spanish.  You don’t have to say ‘hola’ to me.

Being in numbers often times creates a false sense of courage in kids, so the other kid laughed, and began motoring his mouth as I proceeded to leave them behind.  In the midst of my pulling away I heard “So what are you?  French?  Italian?  You speak Japanese?

Wow.  Aside from being Spanish, I’m mistaken for a French person, or an Italian person, before even hitting the continent of Asia?  Man, these little black kids live in a sheltered world.  I’m actually surprised at how dumb these kids are going to grow up to be.

No turning back now

I am officially signed up for Run For Your Lives.  I will be in the 1:00PM wave, and I am hoping to survive this ordeal with at least one health flag intact.  I have no intention of failure for this event.

I have been talking this up to many friends lately, as I would greatly love to experience an event like this with others, and not solely by myself.  That being said, if anyone would like to join my starting wave, it is the 1:00PM wave.  Regardless, I have full intention of hanging out afterward, to see what the Apocalypse Party is all about.

So to reiterate, I’d love to have some companions on this arduous 5K quest through zombie-infested woods.  1:00PM starting wave, register and join me run motherfuckers.  I haven’t looked forward to something on this magnitude in a long, long time.