Just going to put this whole post behind a jump, because it’s straight up nothing but spoilers.
Tag: geeks
League of Payforachievements
Since not all of my six readers are League of Legends players, much less gamers at all, I’ll try to kind of start with an analogy that those who have gamed at all within the better part of the last decade might understand.
Achievements, have become a pretty normal thing in today’s gaming landscape, with players getting little pop-up notifications in-game from their systems themselves, when they accomplish particular tasks in the games they are playing. Ultimately, they’re utterly useless in the grand spectrum of most games, but their existence has created somewhat of a collecting hobby for those who game.
Some achievements are justly achieved by accomplishing monumental feats, like beating Mass Effect 2 on the hardest difficulty without dying once. Others are as systematically simple as proceeding through the story, and getting an achievement for each notable storyline break point. There are achievements of insanity, such as completing an entire Left 4 Dead 2 campaign only using a melee weapon. There are achievements of futility, such as deliberately getting every single question wrong in a round of 1 vs. 100, and then there are achievements of everyone gets a trophy, such as simply starting a game.
The point is, achievements have become somewhat of a point of bragging among gamers, and one of the greatest accomplishments is getting a 100% of achievements earned in games, because usually every game has a good variety of achievements from layups to Hail Marys. As in the case of XBOX Live, players’ stats have a running tally of how many games they get 100% success rate on, and for players like me, it’s something to be prideful of, to be able to prove just how little of a life I can sometimes have, when I obsess over trying to Boomer Bile over all four survivors in one hurl.
Strengthening today at the cost of tomorrow
Impetus: Washington Nationals sign pitcher Stephen Strasburg to 7-year deal/extension, worth $175 million dollars
The best thing about baseball contracts like this one is that when the day is over, seldom do the initial headlines come remotely close to the actual payouts by the teams that make these ludicrous deals, paying grown-ass men to play kids’ games.
Case in point, one of the most notorious ironically humorous baseball contracts in history is Bobby Bonilla’s contract signed in 1996. On paper, Bobby Bonilla signed with the Florida Marlins on a deal that dictated he would be paid $23.3 million dollars over four years. Sounds simple enough, right?
The Marlins being the Marlins (read: cheap), would eventually trade Bonilla away in 1998, but the rules of a contract state that the acquiring team assume responsibility of remaining salary, unless negotiated in the deal. The Dodgers paid the remainder of is 1998 salary, before trading him to the Mets after the season, so the Mets would be on the hook for the 1999 and 2000 portions of his deal.
Bonilla was such a clubhouse cancer with the Mets that after 1999, the Mets wanted to be rid of Bonilla, and Bonilla was more than happy to continue his career elsewhere. The problem was that the Mets were still contractually on the hook for the remaining $5.9 million dollars on the deal, but frankly didn’t want to pay it, citing the need to cut payroll and organizational rebuilding.
Ultimately, the Mets and Bonilla came to an agreement, which has to this very day, become one of the greatest jokes in all of baseball history, and a huge contributor to why the Mets remain such a butt of baseball jokes.
Instead of paying Bobby Bonilla $5.9 million dollars in 2000, the Mets would pay him $0. However, it was agreed upon that starting in 2011, the Mets would begin paying Bobby Bonilla approximately $1,193.248.20 every July 1st – for the next 25 years.
It doesn’t take a genius to quickly realize the math doesn’t even come close to equaling the $5.9 million dollars that he was owed in 2000, but closer to five times the amount, $30 million dollars, by the time 2035 rolls around.
The Mets have to live with always having Bobby Bonilla thrown at them in tacky arguments, while Bobby Bonilla, whose career ended in 2001, will cash in every July 1st for pretty much the prime of his retirement years, laughing all the way to the bank, along with the baseball fans who love to make fun of the Mets.
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Probably not a very smart decision
Impetus: three popular League of Legends commentators declare refusal to work the Mid-Season Invitational event, citing poor freelance rates.
These guys realize they get paid to talk about video games, right?
Honestly though, I see both sides of the argument here. Ultimately, I understand the concept of a labor dispute, and it’s good on the part of Monte, DoA and PapaSmithy, that they’ve done their homework, and learned what other casters are making, and it’s only fair that the penultimate game representatives of the eSports scene, should probably be paying competitive rates.
But at the same time, these are guys that make a living talking about video games. These are not underpaid doctors, teachers, construction workers, civil servants or any other occupation that actually makes a difference in the world we all live in. These are guys that watch teenagers play video games at a highly-competitive level, and talk about it.
Is it really that important to always know what’s “trending?”
Since I’m such a man of the times, I’m currently on book five of Game of Thrones: Song of Ice and Fire. Unlike a lot of epic literary series, I’ve actually enjoyed GoT in written form a great deal, and I look forward to completing book five, and subsequently be like all other GoT novella fans, and (im)patiently await the sixth.
On that note, it goes without saying that I am very much behind in the television series, as it moves at light speed on screen in comparison to the pace of the novels. I’ve just finished watching the second season of the show, and upon hearing news not too far ago about how things in season five of the television series will spoil plot points for what lies ahead in the not-yet-released book six, I can say that I will probably not watch any of season five, if I can help it.
Yes, I am one of those snobs, who always plays the game of comparisons between book and screen. This should not be one iota of surprise to anyone.
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The nerd rage over new Harley Quinn is real
Over the last few days over social media, I’ve seen Margot Robbie’s leaked images of her portrayal of Harley Quinn called things from a “strung-out hooker” to all sorts of rage that she’s basically not Paul Dini’s rendition of the character. This is the sort of thing that happens when you know a whole lot of females that cosplay.
Interestingly enough, there was barely a fifth of the same kind of rage when just weeks ago, Jared Leto’s rendition of The Joker was released. When it comes to nerds, Harley Quinn is one of the epitome pinups of nerd culture as a whole, and basically any attempt to even try and humanize Harley would predictable end up with resistance and rejection outright.
Naturally, nobody really needs to be reminded that most nerd collective hated the initial still of Heath Ledger’s Joker when The Dark Knight was being teased, but after the movie was released, it was a pretty unanimous conclusion that Heath Ledger was absolutely brilliant in the role and portrayal.
Continue reading “The nerd rage over new Harley Quinn is real”
Zelda fights aren’t as epic in real life
Long story short: girl has argument with live-in boyfriend, girl calls ex-husband for consoling. Ex-husband arrives to house, confrontation with boyfriend erupts. Boyfriend happens to be a Link-cosplaying nerd, runs to Lost Woods bedroom to grab Master Sword replica to defend himself with. Husband is stabbed and slashed a few times by very real-bladed sword, but gets in some offense himself by breaking a pot over boyfriend’s head, before authorities arrive.
Imagine the arrogant, shit-eating grin on my face while I was reading this. Some days it’s really difficult for me to find something to write about, but occasionally there’s a story like this that just makes writing so fun.