Tag: white people

It’s basically golf cosplay, lol

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

I briefly stopped at my sister’s place on the way home from a tiring jaunt up to my old stomping grounds, and we went out to dinner.  She took me to this neighborhood tavern that she and my niece swore by, but when we got there, the place was slam packed, by almost entirely white people.  In fact, I didn’t mention it to my sister, but I felt a little uneasy at the sheer lack of diversity in the place outright, because frankly I don’t feel comfortable in any place that’s so overwhelmingly saturated with just one demographic.

But anyway, I couldn’t help but notice that in spite of the fact that it looked like the Republican National Convention fanclub in there, just about every single dude in the place was dressed in their typical white guy golf gear; polo shirts, khaki shorts, etc, the kind of shit that I imagine all white guys meticulously equip themselves in when they’re preparing for a day of white guy-ing it up on the green, day drinking, taking bumps, and talking about how much colored people inconvenience their general way of life.

And then I noticed that three out of the four televisions in the joint were all tuned to coverage of The Masters, and that all of the Ben Afflecks had their eyes glued to the screens, watching Rory McIlroy I guess having a good day, since his minus number was greater than everyone else’s whenever a score graphic popped up.

But the point of this post is that I feel like either this is something that’s kind of becoming a new thing, or perhaps it’s something I’ve just never noticed in the past, because perhaps I’ve just managed to never bother to go out during any prior Masters broadcasts throughout the last few years, but it’s apparent that white guys really like to indulge in cosplaying as golfers while they watch golf in sports bars and pubs, and absolutely nowhere near a golf course.

Like I think it’s pretty amazing if I really have never gone out during a Masters broadcast in the past, and I’ve just been missing this phenomenon of white men getting decked out in all their golf paraphernalia just so they can watch golf, so I have to imagine that it’s perhaps more of a recent thing, but the point remains that this is basically the white people equivalent of their rendition of cosplay, but instead of dressing up in expensive, elaborate costumes of their favorite show, comic or video game characters, they’re instead dressing up in expensive renditions of their favorite golfers.

White folks are usually so arrogant and critical of pretty much anything alternative or stemming from origins perhaps not based in America, so it’s really amusing to me to identify something that all these white bros are all into, and despite the fact that I was just in a specific part of Virginia, I feel like that it’s probably not exclusive to that region, and that if I make a conscious effort to keep my eyes peeled in the future, I’m certain I’ll notice it here in Georgia, or wherever I might happen to be in future airings of The Masters.

The craziest part about all these distractions

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

A little while ago as I was doomscrolling, I saw this one meme.  At this point, I can’t remember what it was about, whether it was Iran getting bombed, the rise of shitty gas prices (again), a bunch of dumb white guy CEOs biting into hamburgers, or whatever, but it went like, The craziest part about X is that [orange fuckface in the white house] is named in the Epstein Files over 3,000 times.

For whatever reason, this stuck with me, and I really began to actually think about recognize about all the shit going on in the country and across the world, that really are just a whole bunch of distractions to the fact that the sitting president of the United States has been named countless times in the Epstein Files.  And of course, not a single fucking soul is doing anything about it, and as much as I want to love my country of birth, I just end up hating it a little bit more each time I think about it and am reminded of such.

A few years ago, I felt like I had one of those life’s revelations that in spite of the constitutional right to have information, the media really does go out of their way to steer people away from thinking about bigger issues, and at the time, there was a big hullabaloo about the Washington Redskins finally agreeing to change their name, conveniently at a time where the country was in turmoil over coronavirus, Black Lives Matter demonstrations, and just the ‘usual’ state of civil unrest.

That was probably the first time I really noticed and recognized a scenario of mass distraction like that, and despite the fact that I was like 40 years old, it felt like one of those naïve moments of realizing that the world isn’t quite as innocent and altruistic as we might want to believe it is. 

We are truly never too old to learn and realize new things.

Either way, that’s kind of where I’m at these days, feeling frustrated, disappointed, and generally mad at my country for being so simple-minded and easily distracted to bigger things.  Obviously, I knew nothing major was really going to come out of the initial release of Epstein Files, because Washington is a spineless and gutless swamp full of people with all the cards who would absolutely not narc on each other, and would sooner eat their young than to act in a manner that positions themselves contrary to the mutation of whatever direction-wing that the right has transformed into these days.

It’s almost flabbergasting the lengths that the current administration has gone to in order to get people not talking about the Epstein Files, and that the actual president of the country is named literal thousands of times in it, which is absolutely not a good thing, considering the context of just about everything else in them.  Like, the United States basically started a war, with Iran, in order to get people to avert their eyes somewhere else.  And then predictably, war-like conditions always result in a spike of gas prices, and for the people lucky enough to remain blind to World War 3, they definitely wouldn’t miss the escalation of gas prices on the homefront, and then they’re busy being miserable about that.

But honestly, it’s the fucking noise about the McDonald’s CEO and the wimpy bite he did, and the ensuing chatter and bullshit that has emerged from that, that has me feeling the most enraged.  Because there’s literally an unearthed horrific global pedophilia ring that was just revealed, but people would rather expend their energy debating and analyzing some rich asshole taking a bite out of a hamburger.

As much as I loathe all of the fucks in Washington that are keeping our entire country as the cesspool it’s been downgraded to, I have just as much vitriol and disdain for all the people in the country that fall for such elementary distraction tactics.

I digress though.  This is a topic that I really didn’t want to expend any energy on, because politics are all shit and I hate them, but it’s like when I’m on social media, and I see things that I want to comment on, where I can utilize the template of “the craziest thing about X is that [orange fuckface] is in the Epstein Files,” but I don’t want to deal with the rebuttals and responses of anyone who does live on that side of the fence, because their stupidity would undoubtedly be detrimental to my general state of mental health.

So to my safe little brog that nobody reads, where I can pop off about whatever topic I want, without there being any real chance for any recourse, even ones as inflammatory as politics are.

Like sending gorillas to do custodial work

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

That’s the best analogy that comes to mind when I think about the bright idea to send ICE agents to Atlanta Hartsfield-Jackson Intergalactic Spaceport, Nail Salon and Chicken Tender Museum in order to assist with crowd control and the nightmare scenario where the vast majority of TSA agents are no-showing because they’re not getting paid.  Sure, they’re marginally capable of perhaps doing some base job functions like staring at people menacingly while behind a gaiter and holding an automatic firearm so that people think twice about trying to cut any lines and shave an hour off their wait, but there’s a higher possibility that these ICE clowns make things worse, escalate a situation, and there’s probably going to be more arrests and possibly deaths, before any progress or civility is restored to the airport.

I’m just really glad that I don’t have any upcoming flight bookings coming up, because I’d probably punt on any airline travel I have coming up if it required me to go through ATL right now, because it doesn’t seem to matter when people are rolling up to the airport these days, the waits just seem to grow commensurate to how early people are showing up.

Mythical wife and I are current with The Pitt, and the most recent episode introduced a sub plot where two ICE agents bring a woman set to be detained to the ER, because she was most likely injured during a raid that they conducted.  And the presence of ICE in at the hospital passively makes all sorts of minority staff, patients and waiting patients to peace the fuck on out of the Pitt.

When Doctor Robbie tells them to stay the fuck to themselves and not be meandering around, they basically roid rage and attempt to interrupt the treatment of their detainee and send her to detention without treatment, with no regard for her injuries, and when an RN intervenes, he gets taken down and arrested as well, and in classic Pitt logic, there is no situation that cannot be made worse, somehow.

I feel like this is exactly what’s going to happen at ATL, with ICE wandering around the airport now.  All sorts of Hispanic and other minority would-be passengers will see them lurking around, and decide it’s not worth getting targeted and possibly detained and shipped off to a concentration camp detention center, and slip on out of the airport and ironically, ICE will have assisted in relieving the congestion of humanity at the airport, slightly, but seeing as how this was probably also the intention of the whole plan, it begins to grow the narrative that airline travel is becoming more of a white privilege than it already is.

Regardless, it’s just sad, laughable, and endlessly pathetic to see the state of, well, everything these days.  ICE agents trying to do TSA functions is like asking gorillas to do custodial work, at first they’d probably show remote capability of the bases of functions, but ultimately something is going to set them off, and ragey, power-tripping violence is going to be inevitable.

The craziest part about all these airport nightmares is that the guy sitting in the White House was named like 3,000+ times in the Epstein Files.

I hope Dodger Stadium will get a big weeb gong soon

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

KTLA: Dodger Stadium sells the naming rights to the venue for the first time in history, to Japanese clothing company, Uniqlo

By now, there’s no shortage of jokes about how the Los Angeles Dodgers have gone long since gone full-retard when it comes to their relationship with the entire fucking country of Japan.  The acquisition of Shohei Ohtani brought forth the current wave that has left Hideo Nomo-mania in the dust, and then with the rapid acquisitions of Yoshinobu Yamamoto and Roki Sasaki, the organization has fully embraced their buy-in to the old Japan = Superior meme from old weeb culture.

However, as much as I, like many out there, like to take our shots at the organization for leaning into being weeaboos, there’s no denying that it has been absolutely nothing short of lucrative.  As much money the team has dumped into player commitments spanning the next two decades, the team has purportedly already made that money back, multi-fold, from all the deals, sponsorships and rights solely from Japanese companies.

On top of the fact that winning is about the most lucrative thing any sports organization can do, the Dodgers have become a veritable money printer over the last decade, with the last 2-3 years being a massive peak, so when the day is over, myself and all other critics are merely haters and jealous fatties when it comes to voicing our criticisms and dislikes about the team, but they’re still churning money out like they invented the printing press for currency, and a lot of already-rich white guys are getting richer, and fans of the team are enjoying a squad that’s been playing near .600 ball over the last few seasons with a contention window that’s seemingly never closing.

But the news of Dodger Stadium selling the naming rights to the ballpark, that piques my interest just beyond being a not-fan of the Dodgers, but rather to my appeal as a ballpark enthusiast, as well as someone who’s one of those traditionalist olds who is reluctant to accept certain changes.

Even if I weren’t a fan of the team, there was still something inherently cool about the fact that Dodger Stadium had long remained one of the few MLB parks that didn’t sell naming rights.  Yankee Stadium, Fenway Park, Camden Yards, Angel Stadium, come to mind off the top of my head; I’m reluctant to include Wrigley, since it’s the technically the name of a the gum company too, the Royals are reportedly soon to be leaving the K soon, and Nationals Park is simply biding their time waiting for the right company to sell the naming rights to.

But for the OG’s, there was always something cool about how they didn’t sell their naming rights, it’s like the entities that owned them didn’t care, or wanted to have their name on them, even at the expense of the millions that could come with selling out.  A control thing, or a power play, perhaps, but the fact that they remained unbranded, regardless of how I might have felt for the teams that played in them, just seemed cooler than boring ass bullshit like Truist, LoanDepot, AT&T, Citizens Bank, Citi or other soulless white guy corporations slapping their names onto venues.

And even though Dodger Stadium isn’t even close to my upper quartile of MLB parks, with their horribly uncomfortable seats, shitty sound system and overpriced concessions, at least they had the dignity to remain, just Dodger Stadium, and not be some lame corporate sellout in order to get a cheap pay day… until now.

And of course, it goes to a Japanese company, with Uniqlo being granted the ability to overpay for the naming rights to the biggest weeb team outside of Nippon Professional Baseball.  The name is yet to be revealed, although it is heavily speculated to be “Uniqlo Field at Dodger Stadium,” with the probable hopeful ideology that fans will not embrace the new name and continue to refer to it as “Dodger Stadium” which is obviously what’s going to happen while the team gets to pocket the naming fees all the same.

But it still seems really lame that the Dodgers would allow this to happen, all the same.  It’s like for the last 64 years, they didn’t feel the need to sell out the name of the ballpark, but it’s become evident over the last decade that there has been a shift in management to where the organization is determined to make as much money as ungodly possible, even at the expense of some of their long-standing integrity pillars, like the name of their ballpark.

I can’t hate the pursuit of money too much, because I kind of understand the rich’s obsessions with getting richer, and the success of the Dodgers won’t last forever, so it’s not the worst idea in the world for all the people in charge of the organization trying to amass as much wealth as possible while the getting’s good, and considering the team is on the hook for like $1.3 billion in payroll to cover for the next 20 years, it’s not a bad idea for the team to build as much of a cushion as they can, all while all the stuffy white guys on whatever board of directors or investors can still get their nut too with others to pay.

But with Uniqlo joining companies like Daiso, Nippon Air, Yakult, it just feeds to overwhelming narrative that the Dodgers don’t so much belong to Los Angeles as much as they belong to the entire country of Japan, and I can’t help but wonder what the heavily Chicano population that actually attends Dodgers games on the regular feels about it.  Probably not negative while the team is still on top of the league, but I look forward to seeing how salty people get when the Dodgers will inevitably feel the pressure of a closing contention window, and hopefully one day feels what it’s like to have to go into rebuilding and have to eat some losing seasons.

I imagine the salt that comes from the rapidly abandoning ships of the Dodgers bandwagon will be an especial delicacy, but that probably won’t happen for quite a long time; but it will inevitably happen, because no team stays on top forever.

It’s the Four Loko that makes this amusing to me

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

WSB: Hall County sheriff busted for DUI after blowing a 0.212, revealed that he had been drinking Four Lokos since 6 a.m.

Under normal circumstances, a story like this would roll off my back, perhaps get an eye roll out of me, knowing that police protect their own, and that regardless of how egregiously drunk the guy was, while in his county-issued vehicle, it’s safe to assume that he’s not going to be getting close to the same kind of punishment that us normal citizens would receive under similar conditions.

He may lose his job, but considering he’s out there drinking while on duty, he probably doesn’t care in the first place, and he’s most likely not going to be doing any time, or have a suspended license, or be on probation on account of the oft-cliched professional courtesy.

But what caught my attention and why this is ending up as brog-worthy is the clarity in the headline that this particular pig in question, hadn’t just been drinking since six in the morning, but he had been drinking Four Lokos in his cop car:

Couch told investigators that he had been drinking several Four Lokos since 6 a.m. that morning. Investigators also found two open cans of Bahama Mama that had spilled in his car.

The devil is in the details, and now we’re talking. 

Obviously, anyone who’s ever known me might recall my own fascination with Four Loko back over a decade ago.  I was mystified by the fact that these shitty, $4 tall boys of nuclear race piss were actually killing college bros, dumb enough to be drinking more than like, one, at a time.  When the government declared banishment on the drinks, for whatever reason, I felt the compulsion to seek out some of these awful drinks, and managed to procure several cans of various flavors.

Over the next years, I would bust them out at social gatherings or Dragon*Cons as my drink of choice in order to get a healthy buzz going, and make no mistake, one can of any Four Loko was instant drunk, and anything beyond that was playing with fire.

Eventually, I would steer away from this dumbass behavior, and the remainder of my hoarded cans would remain ironic collector’s items, that is, until for whatever reason, some of them would spontaneously eat their own cans, leading to some obnoxious messes that I had to clean and eventually realized that I should just chuck them out, thus closing the book on my keepsake cans of Four Loko.

Back to the present, Four Loko survived government intervention, but they apparently changed the formula somewhat to be less lethal when drank in stupid amounts, and they’re still available at gas stations and wherever shitty booze is sold.  And apparently for one Hall County sheriff, it was his go-to drink for when he wanted to get smashed on the job.

Like I said, if it were just a story of a cop who got blasted on the clock, I probably wouldn’t have given it a second thought beyond knee-jerk disgust and disappointment in the system.  But finding out that he had been getting smashed on Four Loko since six in the morning, and he was discovered obliterated five and a half hours later, man clearly had some serious demons in his closet for all this to be transpiring.

And that 0.212% BAC is pretty frightening, because to my understanding that’s basically saying that over 20% of the blood in his body was tainted with alcohol.  I’ve gotten drunk off of Four Loko before (always under slightly more responsible, non-driving conditions), but I have come down from the buzz pretty normally, so I doubt that I was ever remotely close to a 0.212% BAC, so I’m curious to how many cans of the jet fuel he consumed, and let’s not ignore the fact that he had several open cans of Bahama Mama, which is another fruity, race piss-like canned booze, so clearly this hick sheriff was having a one-man party in his cruiser.

Either way, I’m amused by the brief resurrection of Four Loko into the public lexicon, and the ironic and pathetic circumstances in which they did so.  In a way, there isn’t a better way for it to have happened, and 16 years later, Four Loko is running it back with inebriated chaos like it’s 2010 all over again.

I can’t even begin to express how pathetic this notion is

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Whilst doomscrolling earlier in the day, I came across this ad for some app/community that was targeting couples with no kids who seem to be exasperated with the idea that they’ve been marginalized and feel the need to require the crutch of a specifically curated app/community to meet other couples with no kids for platonic friendships and relationships.

I stared at my screen for a few seconds, and if my eyes could roll further back, they might accidentally connect with my sinuses and then accidentally roll into the back of my throat, I’d accidentally swallow them, and I’d be blind for the rest of my life.

As the kids would say, (get) the fuck outta here

There are actually couples without kids out there that feel that they are the ones who feel marginalized?  They’re the ones who feel the societal shift because they didn’t want to have children?  They feel like their circles alienate them because they don’t have kids?

Have these self-absorbed twats been paying attention to the news?  Remotely even heard about the rapidly falling birth rates?  Women who feel empowered to shut the gate toward the continuous survival of the human race until shithead men get their act together?  Most Asian countries on an eventual timeline of extinction, because their birth rates have fallen faster than anywhere else?

Like, the way it works is that the more these birth rates fall, and if they were to continue, the human population, as overpopulated as shit is now, eventually does swing in the opposite direction, and sure it would be quite some time from today, but would eventually be on a timeline towards extinction, if none of the societal problems of the world don’t wipe us all out first.

But it’s all summed up with me looking at this ad and service and thinking, are you fucking kidding me?

I think the testimonials are what set me off the worst, people whining about how they’re feeling like pariahs because they don’t have kids, and how hard it is to meet other couples and people.  I’m like, mother fuckers, if the shoes were on the other feet, and you’re the ones with kids, and realizing just how much of your general social life much less life’s aspirations you have to put on hold in the name of being somewhat decent parents, maybe, just maybe you’d understand just how tone deaf and asinine such a service is.

To a parent like me, hearing about a service/app like this is like millionaires who developed an app to help them find more money.  I have zero regrets about choosing to become parents, but I’m not going to lie and say that I don’t see my childless friends and not be astounded by the freedom, flexibility and general ability to do whatever the fuck they want that I don’t always think they seem to realize they might be taking for granted.

Couples without kids have a degree of freedom that parents will not have for a very, very long time, at least not without the sacrifice of time spent with their children.  Them complaining about how hard it is to meet other couples, to me is like, they simply have forgotten how to open their fucking door and step outside, because I can assure these flakes that it’s a whole lot harder to meet couples with kids in tow, than it is without, because our offspring are wild variables completely incapable of controlling.

These out of touch headfucks seem to think that parents meeting parents is such an automatic-in with making friends, but just because our kids get along doesn’t mean the parents will.  It helps a little bit, but in the six years I’ve been raising two kids, I can comfortably say that we can probably count on one hand of the parents we actually like, and even still, we’ve never had any sort of meal, play date or social gathering with them at all.

I will concede that meeting people in this day and age is harder than it’s ever been, due to a variety of factors, be it societal, the stark divides between various socioeconomic, idealistic, classist factors, COVID did a number on peoples’ social skills, and the fact that millennials and on have all been raised by the internet and people just don’t know how to interact with each other.

But for couples with no kids to complain about how hard it is to meet other couples with no kids, is tone deaf on a monumental degree, and these cocksuckers have no idea just how easy they have it.  Them not being able to have spontaneity, flexibility or meaningful relationships isn’t a problem with all couples with no kids, it’s exclusively just them.  Trying to make it an umbrella issue, might unearth a good bit of like-minded couples, but really, it’s just revealing a whole lot of lazy, untalented, uncharismatic assholes out there.

There are probably way better analogies for Tarik Skubal’s WBC participation

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

But the first one that comes to mind is when Amazon announced the first-ever Prime Day, they were boasting that it was going to basically be the Brack Friday of the summer, that there were going to be all sorts of incredible deals, massive savings, and that it was going to be the greatest shopping event of the year outside of the holidays.  But when Prime Day began, it became quickly apparent that it really was Amazon’s cleverly-named attempt to clean out their warehouses, because for every one marquee item they had that sold out in two seconds, there were at least a million listings for dumb bullshit like USB cables, electrical outlet covers, dish towels, and all sorts of small, inane crap that nobody really needed.

Anyway, that’s kind of what it feels like to find out that reigning AL Cy Young winner and vocal proponent of USA Baseball, Tarik Skubal revealed that he was only planning on making one start in the World Baseball Classic, and then returning to Spring Training.

Skubal was one of the first players announced for Team USA, and an easy guy to hitch the wagon to, as someone whose incredible arm could easily carry the squad deep into the tournament, and most importantly, potentially neutralize the potent lineups of Japan, Venezuela and the Dominican Republic.

Considering the United States has only won the tournament they basically invented in order to pad their global athletic standing once out of five times, it’s got to be like a sour grape for USA Baseball, and something they always want to wash the taste out of their mouths, by winning again, and closing that lead held by Japan, who has won 3 of 5, and a guy like Skubal committing is a giant boon, especially since he was shortly followed by NL Cy Young winner, Paul Skenes, creating an incredibly unfair-sounding 1-2 pitching duo in a short tournament format.

But now Skubal reveals that he’s only planning to make a single start, against Great Britain of all teams in the tournament; unsurprising, once such intel was absorbed by baseball fans, it quickly turned into snarky vitriol towards the talented lefty, with people accusing him of unpatriotically going into body protect mode, since it’s clear that he’s going to be seeking out a gabillion dollar contract after the 2026 season, as he’s set to become an unrestricted free agent for the first time.

Like, in one hand, I get the importance of protecting one’s self, especially considering the last WBC saw closer Edwin Diaz blow out his knee in 2022 and miss an entire season, and injury is always on the backs of the minds of nearly every participating major leaguer.

But in the other hand, if Skubal knew that he wasn’t going to commit more than a single fucking start for Team USA, I feel like it probably would’ve been best had he just not committed to the team in the first place.  Free up the spot to someone who really wanted to put their balls on the line for the country, and is willing to make three starts if needed, which should encapsulate a group, knockout and potential final in a best-case scenario.

In a way, joining the squad but then only committing to a single appearance, against possibly the worst team in the entire tournament is tantamount to being a part of a group project in school, doing the very first assignment, but then not doing anything at all for the remainder of the project.

Look, I know my analogy game is terribly off right now, but the point is, Skubal’s shenanigans is like a shitty rug pull that gave US baseball hope, but then took it all back.  If anything, if Skubal was only going to commit to a single game, it would be best served if it were saved to be against Japan or any of the other expected powerhouses of the tournament, and save appearances against scrubs like Great Britain, Brazil or Italy for guys like the retired Clayton Kershaw or Logan Webb.

Obviously, I’d love to see Team USA win another WBC, because I don’t think Korea is going to make the runs they did like they did in 2006 and 2009 ever again, but it’s times like this where the greed and body-protect logic of professional athletes gets really fucking old.  There’s a reason why Japan has won three of the five WBCs, and there’s very little reason to believe that they’re not going to be knocking on the door of a fourth one in coming weeks.