Long story short: Woman in California buys two Super Bowl tickets from someone living in Florida for just under $5,000 off of a Craigslist ad. FedEx package arrives, containing nothing but a crappy black and white promotional image of the Super Bowl with “Enjoy the game! Go Ravens! LOL.” Butthurt woman somehow manages to do nothing but get the story to go viral on the internet, and Ticketmaster swoops into the rescue and provides her with four, completely free tickets.
I dislike this story very much. And I don’t really believe it’s a real story, and that it’s completely staged by all parties involved.
If it were real, the woman who was screwed out of $5,000 goes all Liam Neeson from Taken on this motherfucker in Florida. She has his phone number, and they allegedly spoke on the phone several times. If it were real, she calls him up and gives him most of the same monologue Liam Neeson gave, with most specifically the part where I will find you, and I will kill you.
Okay, maybe not that extreme, but most definitely get the police involved. A FedEx package can be traced, all the way back to whom sent it out in the first place. Maybe there’s video surveillance from where the perp sent it from if they paid in cash and not a traceable card. And oh yeah, she had his fucking phone number. If I recall correctly, phones can be tracked.
There are quite several things that could be used as a starting point for retribution, other than putting the story on the fucking internet. And if everything failed, then let’s face it, the woman simply got owned by a scam artist on the internet. It’s what she got for trusting in Craigslist in the first place. Craigslist is for giving away the shit you don’t want, and where to look for blowjobs in bushes or something like that. Most certainly not for reliable transactions of goods valued in the thousands.
If it were real, then I take objection with the notion that Ticketmaster comes to the rescue and provides completely free tickets to the biggest ticketed event of the year. The same Ticketmaster that is pretty much synonymous with the word “sucks,” known for their egregious price gauging, false demand and excessive fees. If it were real, then the REAL Ticketmaster most certainly sees this story, and in an act of goodwill, offers the woman some exorbitantly priced Super Bowl tickets, since they’re not available anywhere else. Not including the $20 per ticket surcharge and $10 delivery fee for an e-ticket. If they even do such at all.
If it were real, I hate the idea that a stupid person is getting a massive bailout, after putting themselves in a position of getting owned. This is akin to someone falling for a Nigerian email scam, and then Bank of America feeling bad for them and giving them 200% of what they lost back, completely scot free.
This is precisely why I think this whole thing is one gigantic bullshit fake staged story.
The fact that the woman pretty much did nothing but push the story onto the internet after getting owned like Kunta Kinte raises a red flag immediately. The lack of action and supposed acceptance at getting boned publicly is completely unbelievable.
Ticketmaster is a terrible company hated by every single person on the planet who has ever bought an event ticket through them. There is absolutely no way they would give away free tickets like this if there wasn’t something in it for them. In this case, under the false pretense that the owned people were complete strangers, it’s a strategic public-relations move made to put a boatload of good press on Ticketmaster that they’re people too, and understand the hardships of getting screwed. Naturally since this is all staged, nobody’s really losing anything, but those gullible enough to fall for it might think Ticketmaster isn’t quite so much the devil now.
Actually I take it back; someone kind of does get screwed – that would be the 49ers, since apparently, they ponied up two free tickets as well, on top of the four that Ticketmaster “gave” to the owned people. Amidst the bad press the 49ers are getting pre-Super Bowl what with Randy Moss declaring himself the greatest receiver of all time while being the fourth option on the team that used to have the greatest receiver of all time, to the supposed gay player whose past had some gay relationship in it or something, I’m sure the 49ers could have easily, easily used those two tickets and given them to some cancer-ridden 49ers fan, or some Make-A-Wish Foundation kids for some saving grace good PR themselves. But nope, they’re going to a fake story likely propagated by Ticketmaster themselves.
But oh well, I don’t care about the Super Bowl this year, but this was still something to write about to help pass the time. Ticketmaster sucks, gg easy noobs.
