Chevy is clearly trying to cash into the popularity that Mad Men has cultivated with the whole retro-theme with this commercial for the 2014 Impala. Nevermind the fact that the Impala now looks more like a Honda Accord or a Chevy Malibu than the boat-like muscle pussy wagon back in the 60s, it doesn’t stop Chevy from producing a spot that tries to throwback to older times, even if ultimately the car the “protagonist” drives around looks like it’s an econobox.
The funny thing is that if you were to watch this commercial without Frank Sinatra’s Fly Me To The Moon being audible, this commercial could be portrayed in just about any other era, depending on which music was used.
Anyway, there are two things that I find glaringly stupid about this spot particularly. First, at the 0:27 mark, we see an attractive, olive-skinned young woman walking her English bulldog. And then out of nowhere, the Impalabu rolls up, and without any warning, the driver tosses a dog treat out the window, which the dog catches and gobbles down immediately. The driver drives off feeling suave and debonair while the girl that looks like a cross between Megan Fox and a younger Vanessa Williams, stares with awe.
Who the hell over the age of two, would haphazardly feed a random dog a random treat? What if that dog had health issues, or was simply just overweight? It’s not going to help when some stranger douchebag rolls up out of the blue and is flinging sausages at your dog. If I were the owner, I’d be absolutely pissed if someone did that to my dog. Most dogs also have very temperamental digestive systems; most definitely bulldogs, no less. Thanks to this low-budget dick thinking he’s being all cool in his Impalabu, the bulldog is probably going to have some nuclear shits later on in the day. In fact, it’s probably not so much awe and arousal that the girl is staring off at him as much as it’s shock and disbelief that someone would actually drive-by fatten up her dog. Her lowering her sunglasses is probably so that she could see his plate clearer to report him to whatever authorities.
And then we get to the 0:45 mark, where the protagonist and what appears to be his wife, who happens to be portrayed by the same girl who is the Orbit gum spokeswoman, are going out on a date. They drive out to a beautiful seaside overlook, but instead of enjoying the luxurious view of a moonlit sky lightly illuminating the shimmering ocean, or the soft lights of Whatever City, USA’s skyline, they whip out a projector and screen, and watch what appears to be their wedding day video, leading to believe that it might possibly be their anniversary.
See, now that’s stupid. They’re parked out in a beautiful overlook, one that I’d kill to find one that scenic, where I could practice taking crappy pictures, or fathomably take a date to. But I’d enjoy the scenery, sit outside and simply soak in how nice the place is. Home movies are called such for a reason; they’re for watching at home. The last thing I’d want to do after driving out for 20-30 minutes to an overpass is watch some god damn home movies. I understand that watching a home movie of their own wedding day could be construed as romantic, but you know what else could be considered romantic? Enjoying the view of a beautiful, moonlit seaside overlook.
Save for their performance vehicles, pretty much every Chevy looks exactly the same, with variations in size. The Impalabu is a long way from “bringing back the classics,” no matter how much their marketing tries to state otherwise.
