Tag: mythical

2 Under 2: Inevitability (#049)

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

In preparation for the arrival of #2, I went ahead and put together the double stroller that we will obviously need.  As nice and fancy as it is, with tech that probably rivals the Mach I Iron Man suit, it’s about as bulky as the Mach I, and at 36 lbs. it’s not a weight that I can’t handle, but it is cumbersome given its dimensions, even when folded.

Needless to say, I’m looking at this folded stroller, and it definitely looks like it will take a solid 20% of the entire cargo area in my car.  By itself it’s obviously no big deal, but looking into the future, where there will be road trips, vacations or any sort of outing that will require the need for the stroller as well as some cargo space before/afterward, and I’m beginning to wonder if my car is big enough for my growing famiry.

Keep in mind, I switched to my current car in 2019 in preparation for the famiry that mythical wife and I were starting, and this was “the big car” that was meant for famiry utility and being a responsible adult.  I went from a compact hatchback to a crossover SUV, and barely two years of car payments into it, and I’m questioning myself on whether or not it was the right choice, because two kids showed up a little faster than anticipated, and suddenly all the space that I thought was adequate might not actually be.

Here’s the thing though: I have zero qualms with the notion of getting a minivan.  Mythical wife however, absolutely does not want a minivan, no matter how beneficial and logical they are.  To say she has a jihad against minivans would be an understatement; it’s almost as if minivans crashed into the Twin Towers on September 11th in her mind, they’re that horrendous of an idea to her.

It’s debatable how much of it is joking and how much is truth, but I like to throw hypothetical situations at her, like if we went out one night, and I drank too much, and she’d have to drive the minivan home, would she?  Absolutely fucking not; we can Uber home.  What if I needed a ride from the airport, and I have a ton of stuff, would she bring the minivan to pick me up?  No fucking way, we’d instead be those assholes trying to squeeze a ton of things into her compact car, while Atlanta rent-a-cops on power trips blow whistles at us for obstructing traffic.

However though, a minivan would undoubtedly put all spaces woes to rest in two seconds, and probably still give us enough room to haul the big dog with us if we ever wanted to go somewhere dog-friendly.  Not only could our gargantuan stroller fit inside of the cargo of a minivan, but some full-size luggage would probably be fine, and still have space to spare for the inevitability of buying shit or other things.

I don’t give a flying fuck of the optics of being a dad in a minivan.  I’m a fucking parent, and one with a brain that puts value in versatility, utility and functionality.  Plus the general safety and wellbeing of my famiry.  I’m too old to be self-conscious over the car that I drive, and if it’s imperative for me to have “a cool car,” I’ll figure out a way to get a side car so that I can make myself somehow more adequate to those that care.

Regardless, if the need for space and utility continues to grow, in spite of my wife’s jihad against them, I feel like there’s always going to be the possibility that a minivan, may become an inevitability.  Ain’t no skin off my back. 

2 Under 2: Uncharted Territory (#047)

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

At the time I’m writing this, mythical wife has passed the 36-week mark, and we’re nearly two weeks past the point in which my first was born early.  Needless to say, despite the fact that pregnancies are typically measured in 40-week events, a lot of things can happen in just less than two of them, especially towards the tail end of them.

Sure, no two pregnancies are ever the same as most moms will attest to, but at the same time, there are a lot of commonalities between them as well.  Regardless, since we’re into uncharted territory this time around, there are some stark noticeable differences between the first time and the current.

Mostly insomnia, but also the increasing strain of a growing entity the size of a butternut squash puts on mythical wife’s body, and she’s basically tipping past the point of relief that we’ve made it past 34.5 weeks, to getting eager to serve eviction papers to our little tenant living rent-free.

Despite our general preparation and understanding that baby #2 is on the way, I don’t think it’s really going to sink in entirely, until she’s actually arrived.  When I think about life as it is right now, as a one-child household, and the general routine that’s been carved out, it does make me a little nervous to when we hit the point where #2 arrives and then it’s back to the drawing board of figuring out how each and every day is going to go afterward.  Not that I feel any sort of dread and apprehension at the addition to the famiry, but it’s definitely going to be a challenge when everything is thrown into chaos once again.

But until then, it’s taking everything a day at a time until we’re out of days before the scheduled arrival, with clenched buttholes and constant status checks.  My own dad is convinced that we’ll make it all the way to the scheduled date, but I think mythical wife would rather slit her wrists than wait that much longer, but at the same thing if things show up sooner, then whew, here comes the pandemonium.

2 Under 2: the first restaurant experience (#043)

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Mother’s Day was a big day for my family: we collectively went out to eat for the very first time.  It was my child’s first ever visit to a restaurant.

Ordinarily, this does not sound like remotely anything close to a big deal, but considering my first hasn’t left the house for basically any reason but doctor’s visits, sparse store trips, or riding in the car while we pick up takeout for the first 14 months of her existence, mythical wife and I like to think it is something of a deal to us.

Over the last year, I can count on one hand how many times mythical wife and I have gone out to eat; all were special occasions, and all were either eating outdoors and/or after vaccination.  This dining out experience with our child fills out the first hand, but the point is despite safety measures and vaccinations, my household is still very careful and conservative when it comes to dining out because we have brains and know that the world is still not safe at all, especially in America where we have the dumbest anti-vaxxing non-believing Karen and Karl cultures ruining it for everyone actually trying to bring down the numbers.

Anyway, we went to a Mexican restaurant we like, at an odd hour between lunch and dinner to avoid crowds, and sat on the patio.  We brought our own child seat because I still don’t trust all places, regardless of how buttoned up this restaurant typically is, and the familiarity would hopefully ease the transition of the brand-new experience of eating somewhere other than home, with lots of people all around us, and eating outdoors.

Much to our relief and much to my pride, my daughter was absolutely perfect during the whole time there.  Not a single fuss, no crying, whimpering or whining, and she was completely behaved and perfect the entire visit.  She ate a chicken and cheese quesadilla with no complaints, and mythical wife and I could not have been any happier or proud of her behavior on what was her first ever dining out experience.

Honestly, I don’t know how I’d have felt if it didn’t go so well.  I know I’d be quick to get her out of the chair and try to comfort her in the parking lot or something, since we were already on the patio, but thankfully she was so perfectly behaved, that nothing of the sort had to come into play.

2 Under 2: The continuation of the new father brogs (#40)

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Seeing as how I’d been deliberating the fact that after a year, I don’t think I can really be called a “new” dad anymore, seeing as how I’ve gone through the initial minefield of trials and tribulations of sleep depravation, diaper blowouts and all sorts of things that are associated with bringing new life into the world.

And since the WWEShop was gracious enough to finally bring the cost of the women’s tag blets I had 100% intention of purchasing for my two daughters down to my target price point, I pulled the trigger, blets were received, this photo was taken, it seemed like now was as good of time as any to officially change over to a different category title for moving forward.

Most people who might be reading this (all zero of y’all) are probably aware that mythical wife is pregnant and that we’re on the path to bringing #2 into the world this summer, and that it is, another daughter.  I’d often had this feeling that I was destined to have at least one daughter, and I’d be lying if I didn’t have this suspicion that it seemed appropriate for someone like me to end up having a second, becoming a bonafide girl-dad twice over.

Regardless, mythical wife and I are on the timeline of having two children under the age of two, to which just about everyone has opined that we are definitely going to be parenting on hard-mode for the indeterminate future, which seems very obvious, but here we are. 

Despite the fact that it will undoubtedly be excruciatingly difficult at times, and I will probably have like 20 more dad brogs about how much life is hard, I’m sleep deprived, burned out and/or other moments of being stressed out, I still know that at the end of the day, I have loved being a dad to one child and I have all the expectations that I will continue to do so for two, no matter what challenges present themselves to mythical wife and I.

More importantly, since my first daughter will definitively have a natural tag-team-partner-for-life in a sister, it only seemed appropriate that the two of them would have their own blets to commemorate that lifetime partnership.  I imagine there will be plenty of times in which they will team up to the detriment of mythical wife and I, but if they’re working together with success in their mind, there’s only so much ire I could possibly have, and probably smile about the teamwork at a later time.

For now, the girls’ blets will remain in my office along with my collection, because mythical wife absolutely does not want wrestling belts hanging in their respective rooms that she has put a lot of thought into designing.  I acquiesced for the time being, on the condition that if the girls decide on their own that they want them in their rooms in the future, there will be no resistance.

If they are truly my flesh and blood, we all know how this is going to turn out.  But only time will tell on whether or not I’ll experience the next greatest day of my life in the future or not.

Life get back to normalcy? LOL

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Seeing as how my wife shared the news on social media, I figure now is as good as time as any to finally break my own silence on this monumental news.

Originally written on December 1, 2020

We were watching 90 Day Fiancé: The Other Way when mythical wife dropped the suspecting revelation on me.  The queasiness she was feeling over the day might not necessarily been from the ramen the night before.  The last time she felt this kind of nausea… and then there was the admission that a particular monthly event had not happened in a minute.

The next thing I know, I’m driving to Walgreens at 11pm on a Monday night, because we both felt the need to know what we already suspected was going to be the case with the circumstances that were already in play.  The last time we had this conversation like this, it was already a foregone conclusion and the test was merely a formality for visual confirmation of the obvious.

A second child was always something that my wife and I were open to.  She being an only child, knew the general loneliness that comes with growing up with no live-in sibling, and me, I grew up with a big sister, and there’s a pattern within my generation of cousins is that everyone has two kids, so it seemed like something that was bound to happen.  Fortunately, becoming a father and parent has been something I’ve taken to pretty well if I say so myself, and the idea of a second child never really seemed intimidating beyond the notion that my time will be stretched even thinner in the coming years and to have to go through teething with another baby gives me anxiety, but the idea itself was never off the table.

One thing I’ve learned about myself throughout the year is that I have a tremendous amount of love to give, and I have no doubt in my mind that I won’t have any shortage for another kid.

We just didn’t expect it to happen so quickly and so soon, as we’re just days away from our first child’s ninth month since birth.

Continue reading “Life get back to normalcy? LOL” →

Advent Beer #4: Zwönitzer Steinbier by Brauerei Zwönitz

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Here’s the thing: I don’t really drink this much.  I know it’s a 16 oz. beer a day I’m talking about here, but prior to embarking on this advent calendar of beer, I probably drank maybe a beer or two every two weeks, and that’s even if I had anything readily available to drink in the first place.

I’m a social drinker, so when we’re in a pandemic where it’s nigh impossible to actually get social with people, then I really don’t have much impetus to drink.  Frankly, prior to this advent calendar, the last time I really drank was like on, the day where Joe Biden was announced to be the winner, and my larger circle of friends all decided to get on Zoom to have something of a toast/celebration call.  I had four beers that night and was slightly tipsy, but I’m pretty sure I haven’t had any beer since just kidding I had another one beer like a week later when we had company come over for one night.

Point is, I don’t drink much these days period.  Sure I know one beer is never going to really hurt me, but I guess it’s a byproduct of having a tiny human to care for in the early morning hours on a regular basis, that drinking to inebriation and the ensuing fallout, has absolutely zero appeal to me anymore these days.

Anyway, day four of the Costco German beer advent calendar, and we have this beer called Steinbier.  The tryhards at Untappd declare its official name to be Zwönitzer Steinbier, and I guess the word Zwönitzer is there, but it’s much smaller and less prevalent for me to bother considering it.  Regardless, I’m going to assume it’s the name of the brewer, since “brauerei” looks like it would be pronounced something remotely close to “brewery.”

Whatever though, it’s labeled as “Dark Spezial” and Z’s are pretty big in Deutsch so I guess it’s a dark special.  Frankly, I was expecting this to be something like a stout when it’s touted as “dark,” but it was more of a really honey colored amber when poured into a glass.  Based on the color, I was really hoping that this would be a dunkel, since when mythical then-fiancé and I went to Munich, I discovered that I really liked dunkel beers, and they had a tendency to be this dark amber color.

Untappd users have classified this as a steinbier, to which now I think it’s super lame that this can is just called Steinbier.  This is like the equivalent of ornately bottling water, but then simply putting “water” on the label.  This is the second time in four cans in which a beer is classified as a “____ bier” with the kellerbier from day two.  I’m feeling like it’s kind of a cop-out, or just a reason to have more classifications than necessary, because Germans definitely take their beer pretty seriously.

Regardless, the beer was pretty good.  It’s a good rebound from yesterday, but at the same time I’m not sure if this would be ranked #2 or #3 out of the four cans had so far.  Ultimately my knee-jerk reaction is that it’s #3, that something about its flavor was a little intense, and that I favored the lighter tastes of the first two beers of the box.  Still, it was quite easy to drink, but if I’m being honest here, I can’t say that this is something that I’d probably drink more than two of these tallboys before wanting to switch to something not quite so bold flavored.

Obviously, my rankings are to be considered with a grain of salt, as I’ve said, I don’t know shit about beer snobbery, I just know what I like.  Regardless of how I rank these things, every single one of these has been as good if not better than the typical types of beer that are easily commercially available that I tend to favor myself, and I continue to enjoy and look forward to the next day’s brew.

Holiday writing exercise: Reviewing Costco’s Beer Advent Calendar

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

I’m not entirely sure why I decided to turn this into a writing exercise, but here we are.  Mythical wife heard that Costco was doing a wine advent calendar and being the lush that she is, we basically had to drop everything and head over to Costco, despite the fact that they’re always a madhouse these days because they’re a safe(r) place that mandates masks and the de facto place where people go to hoard and amass supplies, whether they need them immediately or not.

So we go to Costco and surprising nobody, they’re flush out of wine advent calendars.  There’s not even a space where the pallet used to be, because according to employees, they were bum-rushed so quickly and cleaned out that they had ample time to repurpose the floor space and make it look like it had never existed there in the first place.  However, at the entrance of the store, we spotted these beer advent calendars, and as a consolation prize, mythical wife picked one up.

During dinner, out of curiosity I scoped theFacebook Marketplace to see if any shitheads were re-selling the wine advent calendars, and lo and behold, sure enough, there’s someone selling them, for a surprisingly modest $20 markup.  Mythical wife doesn’t even hesitate to tell me to take them up on it, and the following morning, I’m traversing a suburban jungle, find the seller, and make a quick transaction.  Apparently, they had purchased several of them, anticipating the potential resale capabilities.  As I said, shitheads.

Long story short, with the wine advent calendar in tow, the beer advent calendar has been bequeathed to me.  And because  I often find struggles with content to write about, I’ve decided to use this as a means to exercise my writing chops, and write about daily beers, and it should be quite well established that I am the furthest from a Beer Advocate beer snob there could possibly be: I loathe IPAs, I like sours, goses, hefeweizens, lagers, porters, and basically most things that aren’t IPAs.

But most importantly, it’s giving me a reason to write daily, and hopefully I’ll have the gumption and drive to actually follow through with 24 days in a row of reviewing beers that I’ve probably never heard of.  But they’re all German, to which I can’t really say that I’ve yet to encounter a German brew that I didn’t enjoy to some degree.