This could be a good mid-life crisis car, if I weren’t already there

Obviously I don’t have the time to stay on top of car news, much less any real news in the world, my city or even my own community, so I have no idea how long this has been in the works, or how much of not-new news this is.  But I recently saw some photos of the 2023 Nissan Fairlady Z, and I couldn’t help but be very impressed with its aesthetics and think it’s one of the more visually appealing cars I’ve seen in a very long time.

Frankly, I suppose I’m the one becoming out of touch and the world of design is leaving an old like me behind, but I haven’t been impressed with lots of cars of today.  They’re boxy, ugly and turning into space ships as far as I’m concerned, and I am disliking a lot more cars than liking them as they’re being released, supply chain be damned.

But the new Nissan Fairlady, now this is something that’s sleek and classic looking, with just enough touches of modern technology that creates an aesthetically pleasing package that is just enough throwback, but implementing a lot of popular elements of today.

From the front, and the side, it doesn’t look too far off of the current 370Z in terms of silhouette and lines.  Maybe looks a little thinner, which I’m good with because I think the current generation looks too fat, caving into the pathetic fat widening of the citizens of the world today.

But it’s the rear end that catches my attention and makes me take longer looks and show some interest in the vehicle beyond just the first aesthetic glance.  It has a very retro-looking hatch, and I love the taillight cluster that definitely harkens back to the 300ZX that was discontinued in the late 90s.

Yes, if I had to pick, I would probably definitely be an ass man, all about that butt.  And the new Fairlady definitely has one that stops and makes me the meme.

The funny thing is that as a whole, the entire car reminds me more of a classic Nissan 180SX in terms of shape and silhouette, but it has the taillight cluster of a 300ZX.  And given the fact that the front does not have retractable lights, it almost feels like a modern take of the Sil-Eighty that I always dreamed of getting/creating myself.

All this being said, one of the first things I said to myself was that this car could very well be a strong candidate for my inevitable mid-life crisis car.  But then I realized that I’m basically already 40 now, which is the stereotypical age in which men stereotypically start going into them, stereotypically getting a muscle car, and dressing like stereotypical douchebags.

And considering the ages of my children, and the inevitable need for a large dad-mobile, short of me becoming wealthier than I am currently and being able to afford an extra, fuck you car, or be willing to recklessly become car-poor, my mid-life crisis car might have to be pushed back a decade or so, to where this car will probably long be gone, and the used versions of them will be modded to oblivion and be basically worthless.

But I can still appreciate great car design, and fantasize about what ifs.  Maybe I’ll turn back the clock, LARP as Gordon (Liu), the guy in the market for a new car, and go test drive one, just to feel what it feels like and get it out of my system.

Looks cool, but will they perform?

It’s been a while since I really wrote anything about anything other than me being depressed, fatherhood, jobs, sports or wrestling, and if there’s ever a topic that gets me all amped up to write, MARTA would definitely be up there.

When I saw this article about how MARTA unveiled new trains, my knee-jerk reaction was to get my clowning shoes on, because just from the text description alone, I figured that there had to be ample opportunities to get back up on the horse and do some clowning.

Honestly though?  After actually taking the time to read the article and see the proposed designs and functionality of the new trains, I don’t really have that much room for clowning.  Although the face of the trains look like a cross between Daft Punk and like a Cerberus shock trooper from Mass Effect, they still look pretty cool, and I think the dynamic light function to indicate the route they’re on is a cool idea.

The interior of the trains have finally come into the modern era, with their being truly connected trains, and no longer there being physical doors leading to exterior access as beggars traversed from car to car.  There is still a lot of room for error when it comes to if people have specific needs for which car they need to get into because of strollers, bikes, or wheelchairs that will have to have some training applied, but at least it’s a start that the cars are actually going to have some variety and not feel like they’re the leftover train cars from the 1980’s DC Metro.

So as ready as I was to get ready to rip this concept apart, I actually don’t have much fuel to burn.  MARTA’s trains have desperately needed updating for nearly two decades, and it appears that it’s finally happening.  Sure, their stations need a lot of attention too, and the general perception of the service and brand seem irreparable, but finally upgrading the trains is a step in the right direction.

However in spite of the upgrades to the hardware, the real question is going to be if MARTA’s actual performance improves, with new trains?  The trains might be shiny and new, but the people running them, and the people riding them, and the stations they’re stopping in and out of aren’t going to be changing that much, and those are the variables that are going to come into play as far as trains remaining on time, hopefully dependable, and not too much the breeding ground for World Star videos.

If so, great.  If not, then still great for the brog, because it’ll be good fodder seeing photos and videos of these brand new fancy trains in the news, where petty crimes, stupidity and some very Atlanta-centric behavior gets the spotlight all the same.

White Men Can’t Jump – the 2022 National Champions, Georgia Bulldogs

It’s easy for me to say after the fact, but no matter how pessimistic I may have verbalized my predictions that Alabama had owned Georgia to the tune of never losing to them since like 2007, I kind of had this feeling that Georgia was finally going to win this one, even in spite of all the tragic history that had befallen the Dawgs over the last 13 years.

  • The game was not in Atlanta. The vast majority of these matchups have always happened in Atlanta, the home of the SEC championship, as well as one prior National Championship matchup a few years ago.  Even aside from Alabama, for whatever reason, Georgia just can’t not shit the bed in their home state, and I feel like there’s an added pressure of playing “at home” that Georgia just struggles with, that would not be in play, being in Indianapolis.
  • Georgia’s defense was truly otherworldly this year. I’m not a diehard Dawgs fan, but it’s impossible for a sports fan to not know what’s going on with them, just through natural sports fan osmosis.  I’ve witnessed every Georgia season come and go since I’ve lived here, and this Georgia defense was on a pedestal above them all, and as the old adage goes, defense wins championships.
  • Alabama beating Georgia twice in the same season just seemed too much ask anyone. Georgia and Alabama have never once, played each other twice in a single season.  Either one of them misses the playoff, or Alabama misses the SEC championship but gets in the playoff.  And with two teams as good as these, it didn’t seem likely one of them would win both games.
  • And of course, baby luck. Yes, it was still in play.  And weirdly, sports success tends to cluster together, regardless of the sports.  Boston had their renaissance period where the Red Sox, Celtics, Patriots and Bruins were winning championships.  When the Eagles won the Super Bowl, Villanova’s basketball won the National Championship shortly afterward.  Tampa Bay had both the Bucs and Lightning win championships just a year ago.  And with the Braves having broken the cycle of suck in Georgia, it seemed appropriate that the Bulldogs follow suite and finally win something themselves too.

And in spite of how poorly Georgia came out of the gate during the game, I had this sense that all was not lost.  Sure, the first half turned into a glorified soccer game, where kickers were the only contributors to the score, but the thing is, Georgia at no point was ever out of the game.  Their defense, as taxed as it was, bent but didn’t break, and held Alabama within striking distance the whole time.

Contrary to the narrative of most prior Georgia-Alabama games, the script of this game just felt different too.  Georgia wasn’t racing to an early lead, where they would then screw themselves up in the second half, collapse and fall victim to yet another Atlanta/Georgia sports team collapse.  They were instead screwing themselves up in the first half, with penalties and unfortunate calls against them, and I made a joke to mythical wife who gets to hear all my mansplaining of hunches and gut feelings, that they still have a chance.

And then with ten minutes to go in the fourth quarter, Georgia sprung to life, almost as if they were deliberately sharking Alabama for the prior 50 minutes of game time, and decided to hit the NOS and actually start playing football.  Stetson Bennett IV, whom I was making jokes about the whole game for having the whitest name in existence, suddenly stopped playing like a little bitch and in like 4 plays that covered like 81 yards, drives down for a touchdown, capped off by this bomb to the end zone, and I’m just like, where the fuck has this guy been for the first three quarters?

Basically, it’s like Georgia was Woody Harrelson from White Men Can’t Jump, where he was playing like a patsy for a little bit, but when it came time to actually play, Stetson Bennett IV turns his hat backwards, pumps up his Reeboks and starts delivering big plays for big scores.

And then the most astounding thing is that Georgia, only up by 8 points, was still in striking distance of a textbook Alabama heartbreaking-dagger-to-the-heart play to tie the game up and win in OT, they are the ones who stand strong for the first time in 13 years, and haul in a pick six, which was hilarious to watch as Kirby Smart is screaming get down get down, but Kelee Ringo’s just like lol fuck that, I’mma be on the cover of Sports Illustrated and next thing we know, when the confetti is falling, it’s not Nick Saban under it all for the 50th time, but finally, Georgia.

Much like seeing the Braves win the World Series, seeing Georgia actually win a National Championship was also up there on the list of things that I wondered if I’d ever witness in my life.  Not that I’m a huge fan of the Dawgs, but I live in Georgia, and I know the success of the team can really boost a lot of people here’s spirits, so I’m quite pleased.  I guess all that’s really left in the bucket of hopes and dreams is Virginia Tech (LOL) and maybe seeing some Korean national teams win something major in baseball or soccer, but they’ll be on their own.

Pretty sure with this, the baby luck is now exhausted, and I ain’t having no more kids.  But the Braves and Bulldogs, not bad for reinforcing my superstition.  You’re welcome, Georgians.

Undefeated, no longer

One of the many things I hate about very likely having COVID is whenever anyone insinuates that it’s remotely close to okay, because the infection numbers are so rampant that it’s almost inevitable that everyone will have caught a variant of it at some point.

My response to that is that a loss is a loss, and there’s no wiping a loss from your record, no matter how successful you are afterward.

Because I’m me, everything is an analogy to sports or wrestling, and the way I see it, everyone who has managed to evade COVID as long as I and my household had, was basically undefeated. 

Fewer things in competition are as hallowed as undefeated streaks, and there’s little more frequent narrative of a streak to inevitably break, with it growing more and more value the longer it goes unbroken. 

The ‘72 Dolphins. DiMaggio’s 56-game hit streak. Ripken’s 2,632 consecutive game streak.  The Oakland A’s 20-game win streak. The Cleveland Indians’ 22-game win streak. Goldberg’s 173-0 streak. Asuka’s 914-day undefeated streak. The Undertaker’s 21-0 Wrestlemania streak.

And in my head, every single person who has managed to go without COVID since it came into existence, y’all are also undefeated.  And up until a week ago, my wife was.  Up until more recently, so was I. 

But now, (very, very likely) not anymore. 

No, it isn’t the end of the world. My wife will recover. I will recover. We could thrive afterward. But it’s still a loss on our records, and that will never go away.  And I fucking hate it.

Back in like 1995, I was playing a season NBA Live ‘95. I wanted to have a season where the Orlando Magic went undefeated with my Penny Hardaway having 100% field goal percentage and averaging like 169 points a game and a triple-double.  I put a lot of time into it, but after about 30 games, the game apparently didn’t like such unrealistic conditions, and next thing I knew, I had a loss to the Seattle SuperSonics on my record and my Hardaway’s numbers were all tarnished. 

I quit the game.  That and-1 was a loss that I couldn’t expunge no matter if I won every single game afterward.  It ruined the ultimate goal.

Having the ‘Rona brought into my home and infecting my household makes me feel like the 2007 Patriots.  We were doing so well, only to be derailed and defeated by an unlikely party.  And the worst part is, I highly doubt the offending party realizes just how much they’ve fucked us.

Whereas they can go home to a childless environment with nobody but themselves to care to recover over, or any real demanding jobs to go to, mythical wife and I have two young kids to be mindful of, boatloads of duties that still have to get done no matter how addled we are; on top of our respective jobs.

Ask any parent how it feels to have to deny their kids an embrace that they want, and tell me that it’s still “fine” that “everyone’s going to get it eventually.”  Don’t try and calm me down with that bullshit reassurance that everyone will get it or that Omicron isn’t as lethal, because I will tell you to go fuck yourselves.

Life is already very difficult as it is right now, but to throw fucking coronavirus into our mix, sounds like a pretty crushing loss and way to end an undefeated streak in a terrible fashion.  I will always resent it, and unlike a video game, this loss on the record is permanent and there’s no turning off and quitting it.

A wrestling analogy I’m proud of

I can’t say that I’ve ever watched much Impact Wrestling in my lifetime, whether they were NWA-TNA, TNA, TNA-Impact, Global Force Wrestling, or whatever iteration the promotion ever was under the ownership of the Jarretts, Dixie Carter, or whomever.  The peak of my viewership of the product was when a distant acquaintance and former schoolmate of mine, Sonjay Dutt was a regular performer, and I was curious to see a guy I went to grade, middle and high school with, live out the dream he always had as long as I had known him, in being a professional wrestler.

But in this day and age when professional wrestling seems to be doing pretty well, with the WWE and AEW sitting comfortably on top of the industry, there are all sorts of tiers beneath  the top of the mountain, and if I had to make a pick, Impact Wrestling would probably be the #3 promotion in North America.  Followed by other promotions like the NWA, maybe Ring of Honor again one day, along with a litany of even smaller independent promotions.

Much is being made these days with all the talent that’s been liberated (read: fired) by the WWE, and how AEW is hoovering up many of the names as soon as their non-compete clauses expire.  Personally, I think AEW’s roster is bloating to unstable proportions, but they’ve yet to collapse under the weight of their talent and their payroll yet.

I saw the card for Impact’s Hard to Kill PPV, and thought that damn, that’s a pretty loaded card.  Numerous championship matches, and what I really like is how Ring of Honor champions are just kind of randomly showing up at other promotion’s shows, to defend ROH blets, and Jon Gresham only adds to the credibility of the card.  In a different point of my life, I’d literally drop what I was doing and hop on a flight to Dallas to try and watch this with my brother, that’s how decent of a show I think this has the potential to be.

AEW has been doing a lot of impressive stuff over the last few weeks, and I hear the chatter, but as I’ve made fairly clear that I just have a hard time caring about the things they’re doing.  In all fairness, I have a hard time caring of what the WWE is doing lately too, but the difference is that I still have Peacock access and can see their PPVs.But despite my general ambivalence towards Impact historically, I’m finding that I’m rooting for them in the midst of all these wrestling promotional battlegrounds.  And I made an analogy that made more and more sense the more I thought about it, and I have to say that I think it’s pretty accurate.

The WWE is obviously the Yankees; they have money, they have history, and they’re the biggest baddest franchise in the business.  AEW is the Dodgers, who are blending all sorts of new-school strategy and flinging obscene amounts of money out on the market to bring in top-tier talent to bolster their roster, even to excess.  But that makes a promotion like Impact, the Oakland A’s, a cash-strapped promotion that does well enough, but has to really maximize the value out of every asset they have and try and play smarter than the richer competition in order to survive.

And when it comes to sports fandom, who doesn’t appreciate the plucky underdogs, especially when going up against the big bad rich opposition?  Hoping for Impact to do well has no consequence or conflict to any allegiances if I had any, and when the day is over, the successes of other promotions outside of the WWE and AEW are better for the industry as a whole.

Whenever wrestlers are released from WWE, most of the time I’m usually like, man that guy/girl would be perfect for New Japan, or Impact, but just about everyone ends up in AEW, due to the money they’re flinging.  I don’t hide that I have these general ideas about promotions, and I think most big white oafs always stand a chance at being the next big bad foreign heel in NJPW, and if there’s one thing that Impact has always done well historically, is that they’ve always cultivated good women’s wrestling.  Even long before the WWE did, Impact doesn’t get enough credit for their contributions to women’s wrestling, and Hard to Kill has some pretty good women’s matches on deck that I most definitely wouldn’t take a piss break through.

Almost makes me think I should perhaps seek out some replicas of the Knockouts Tag Blets, so that my girls can be double champions.

Letterkenny S10 = Ocean’s Twelve

Most people who’ve ever seen Ocean’s Twelve, the sequel to the remake of Ocean’s Eleven, starring George Clooney, Brad Pitt and a massive ensemble cast, might remember that it was kind of a stinker.  The plot was weak, it hardly had a fraction of the pace, charm and rhythm that made Eleven such a fun movie, and the general consensus was that it was about as good of a sequel as Super Mario 2 was to Super Mario Bros.

There was a popular theory that part of why it was such a stinker was that it was basically a working vacation for the cast.  George Clooney supposedly has some property out in Italy, and making a sequel to Eleven, and having it take place in Italy was basically a convenient way to have a big ass working vacation on someone else’s dime, while enjoying the sights of Lake Como in their downtime.

And in the grand spectrum of the trilogy, Twelve really didn’t need to exist.  It basically was an excuse to have an Italian vacation, and everyone in it got a generous payday out of it.

Well that’s how I felt after watching the, thankfully short, tenth season of Letterkenny.  Just a few months ago, I blew through the entire series, seasons 1-9, because it was everything I wanted in a show at the time.  Short episodes, clever writing, a little bit crass, a little bit of heart, and just easy to watch and entertaining.

After I caught up, I became one of those fans, who was excited to hear that there was already a tenth season in the works.  And I was very pleased to see when it had dropped right around Christmas, and I made it a priority to watch, which says a lot considering I have so little downtime as it is.

The first episode ties up the plot that season 9 left off on, but then Ocean’s Twelve basically began immediately after that.  Each episode left me scrunching my brow and wondering what the fuck was the point of what I had watched.  Even before I started discussing it with my friends and ultimately seeing what the geeks in the AVClub thought, I could feel this sense that each episode seemed to be almost checking off boxes in making sure all of the signature characters of the show got a little bit of screen time at varying points, and given the short nature of the season, and the limited amount of running minutes they had, it really did feel like a parade of cameos instead of any semblance of a coherent season.

But the agenda of the season becomes very apparent five episodes in, when it’s mentioned that Shoresy is headed out of town to go play hockey up north.  Of course, everyone knows that show creator, Jared Keeso, plays both Wayne and Shorsey, and it’s a little eye-rolling to know that he is just a smidge pulling a power play by using Letterkenny to promote another show, that just so happens to be starring, himself.

Not to mention, the truly DJ Tanner Wrestling-shark jumping moment where Wayne has a brief moment with Shoresy; I couldn’t help but cringe at the pinnacle of poor flexing done by Keeso in this very moment.

The aforementioned geeks in the AVClub applaud the season as going back to their roots, and to a degree I can understand the necessity of deconstruction so that more potential storylines can emerge from the roots, but I can’t help but feel that this entire season felt like one giant flex by Keeso, where he and all his cast mates could shit out a half-assed season get paid for it, and with the ultimate intent of it all being for the season to serve as a vehicle to promote a spin-off series.

I’m still a fan of the show as a whole, but if we’re being honest here, season 10 of Letterkenny, really doesn’t seem like it ever needed to exist in the first place at all.  Another one-off special, call it New Years or Boxing Day, could’ve sufficed fine to be Shoresy’s meal ticket to his spin-off, and saved viewers like me, the scrutiny of mediocrity.

Cobra Kai x Champion is straight fire

In my perception, athletic apparel company Champion, is kind of B-level.  In the past, they used to be among the pinnacle of the industry, being the official uniform sponsor of the NBA, among other notable partnerships.  But as time passed, I don’t know who initiated the changes, but Champion kind of fell to the wayside; the NBA seemed to allow individual teams to make their own apparel partnerships, and in most cases, Nike was the brand making jerseys and other apparel.  UnderArmour emerged, and the field began to get very crowded in athletic apparel.

Champion, kind of became a second-tier manufacturer in my eyes, and they weren’t nearly as cool as the aforementioned Nike, UnderArmour, or Adidas, among others.  When I went to Braves Spring Training for the first time, I always thought it was cool that their ST venue was called Champion Stadium, but didn’t realize until I got there that that was on account of the Champion brand sponsoring it, with their wordmark being on the façade of the building.

It made me tilt my head at the low-key lameness of it, in spite of the cool name.  The Braves have since moved out of Orlando, and fleeced the people of Sarasota to build them a $175M facility, but the point remains that even they, abandoned Champion too.

When I saw the mass unveiling of Cobra Kai training gear in season 4 (above image), my jaw did a quarter drop, at just how fucking baller and awesome some of it looked.  As much as I think the Kyler Park character is a total choad and a disgrace to Koreans, the shirt he and Kenny Payne and that rando white guy in the back are wearing, is a training shirt that I must have if/when they become available to the public.  And as the scene unfolds, you see that everyone is wearing some form of Cobra Kai gear, some more obvious than others, but they’re all, straight fucking fire.

And then, I noticed the Champion logos on everything, and suddenly, I’m like okay, okay…  If ever there was a way to climb out of mediocrity, associating themselves with a popular IP like Cobra Kai seems like as good of idea as any, if there ever was one.

Now, I’m no longer thinking Champion is such a B-tier brand, and was actively googling to see if and when there was a chance that all this baller gear was ever going to be available to the public.  And if this link is accurate, then yes, there will be.

Anyway, while I’m on Cobra Kai, let’s talk about season 4, and I think it’s safe to say that there will probably be spoilers written out.

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