As I was driving to my car appointment, I drove past a house that had a massive display in their front yard that went to the trouble of spelling out, of all the things in the world, Let’s Go Brandon.  Which is basically the dog whistle phrase that hardcore baked potato worshippers have latched onto like ticks to an elephant’s asshole, for how they feel about the actual president of the United States.  And I feel stupid for having to explain but ticks on an elephant’s asshole seemed too accurate and good of an analogy to pass up.

Firstly, fewer things seem more pathetic to me than anyone, right or left, who is that into politics, that they pollute their properties with propaganda that they are so wanting everyone to notice.  Like, you have absolutely nothing else in your life to be passionate about other than politics, and to a degree that you just have to make sure everyone knows where you stand?  Quite saddening.

Second, the Let’s Go Brandon thing is about the stupidest shit I’ve seen emerge from political meme-licking over the last few decades, and between the last three presidents, we’ve definitely seen some declining bullshit over time.

The thing is though, if I’m the Democratic Party, counteracting Let’s Go Brandon should be the easiest thing in the world to do; as long as we were willing to stop trying to play so high and mighty and stop worrying about the perception of sinking to their level. 

Republicans haven’t been the least bit shy or tried to hide their willingness to capitalize on unethical shit like racism, memes, Twitter and racist memes on Twitter in order to have the upper hand in the political arena.

Plus what I’m about to suggest isn’t even unethical or underhanded, it’s just capitalizing on the opportunity that was dealt to them.

If I’m the Democratic Party, across the board, I’m pushing as many elected officials I can, whose name is Brandon.  Like, legitimately. 

Brandon Affleck for Senate in California.  Brandon Jablonski for Lt. Governor in Wisconsin.  Brandon Marshall for Secretary of State in Mississippi.  Brandon Wojchehowski for Superintendent of Education in Butts County, South Dakota.

Doesn’t matter how big or small the position is, if it’s an elected official, push out a guy named Brandon.

So when the baked potato idiots are all flapping their gums about Let’s Go Brandon or driving around with their stickers on their cars, or wearing shirts or caps with the message on it, or decorating their front yards with the message… they’ll now be supporting these actual politicians named Brandon. 

Preferably Democrats.  Or fuck, even third parties should consider capitalizing on this strategy.  I’m sure a Green or Libertarian party candidate would have more success in the ballots if their name were Brandon, solely based on voters who vote entirely on name recognition alone, which last time I checked is a legitimate reason and tactic behind why some candidates go so ham on signs and campaign awareness.

And that’s basically the point of this whole strategy.  Take the power of the message away from the baked potato’s buffoon followers and it will die faster than Kentucky in this years tournament.  But until then, let all these idiots basically be free advertising for aspiring politicians around the country named Brandon, and see just how much power at the polls name recognition alone does.

I’d wager some money that there would be a laughable amount of Brandons throughout the country who would find themselves in a job after election season is over.  Sure this bones most women and minorities from taking offices, but last time I checked it wouldn’t be illegal for Elizabeth Warren to change her name to  Elizabeth Brandon or Andrew Yang to change his name to Brandon Yang.

Fuck man.  I don’t even like politics, or ever wanted to have shared so many opinions on politics on my brog, but here we are. Fixing political scenarios for free, if I had any readership at all.