Tag: greed

I guess we know who’s vying to be the next Spirit

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Some friends and I were bullshitting on the topic of how Spirit Airlines is seemingly knocking at death’s door, about how if and when Spirit goes under, who takes their place in the airline pecking order, as the new budget airline that will absorb the lion’s share of ridicule and be the butt of all airline travel jokes?  Surely, one would emerge, seeing as how that’s just the natural order of nature, that if the weakest link of any category were to be cut off and killed, that someone would inevitably become the next in line.

The obvious choice would be Frontier, which is basically just Spirit Airlines but branded in green, as far as being a budget airline that lives on nickel and diming the fuck out of their customers, but for those who play it smart, a fairly serviceable option to get from point A to B.  And as someone who has flown both airlines on multiple occasions before, they really are pretty one and the same, and it would stand to believe that when Spirit goes under, those who already didn’t think Frontier was the ass-end of the airline industry, might not have any choice in the matter.

However, a surprising* contender appears to be emerging, as far as being a strong candidate to be the next Spirit, and that would be the once-reputable, once-universally beloved, once-proclaiming to love their customers, Southwest Airlines.

*or not, given the general direction of the company over the span of the last two years

Over the span of the last 12+ months, Southwest has made a tremendous amount of operational changes, with almost none of them being remotely beneficial to consumers.  First, it was them ceasing the whole open seating policy they had, which, to some was welcome, but to others, a sign of conformity and how they were taking one step closer to becoming another United or American or any other middling airline.  Then, in a move that definitely rose the ire of travelers, was the implementation of baggage fees, when for years prior, they boasted how bags flew free. 

And just over the last few days alone, Southwest has continued moving in conceivably the wrong direction, by announcing a large slew of route cuts, that will adversely affect lots of travelers from having direct options, and even had the audacity to try to spin that layovers were opportunities to see different parts of the country.  For as long as it took them to get their hooks into Atlanta, it looks like they’re already trying to reduce, with supposedly over 50% fewer flights this time next year, departing from ATL.

But one new development that is sure to draw the wrath of the internet as well as many around the country is their redefining of the large passenger policy, which was previously that large passengers could purchase a single seat, and get a second seat por gratis, if the flight could accommodate it, which was polarizingly applauded by many as a firm stance of allyship of inclusion of people of all body shapes and sizes.  Under their new policy, large passengers will have to preemptively purchase two seats if they know they will need them, and refunds of the second seat would be taken into consideration but not guaranteed, presumably on a case-by-case basis.

The latter is still probably better than what most other airlines offer, but it doesn’t take a genius to anticipate that the wrath of the internet is just going to see this as a sign of Southwest hates fat people, and when perception becomes reality, they become just like all the other airlines in the end.

The point is, Southwest is seemingly giving no more fucks about customers, contrary to the general brand reputation of theirs over the last two decades prior.  They’ve made it crystal clear that they are trying to profit in a competitive market, which is white people speak for, we know we’d probably be fine operating like we had been over the last half century, but we want to make more money now, so we’re going to say fuck the people and just do what everyone else is doing in order to achieve that.

I mean ultimately, that is the goal of every business in the world, to make money, but there are ways to do it and keep integrity and respect of the people intact, but that of course, often comes at a cost in itself, and when a bunch of old white guys run all these corporations, integrity and respect quickly fall to the wayside in pursuit of those extra nickels and dimes.

But it is funny how rapidly Southwest is selling their soul in order to go from successful company to asshole-rich successful company.  A part of me begins to wonder if Southwest isn’t deliberately tanking their company in one of those strange-but-typical modus operandi of businesses slashing expenses in a massive manner through liquidation and layoffs, in anticipation of a company sale or merger, and that Southwest is somewhere in a process of selling the company or getting absorbed by another airline.

And if so, a little more to be poured out for the airline industry, because within the guts of Southwest Airlines exists the remnants of AirTran, the budget airline that did succeed, and that I flew the shit out of, because they accomplished absolutely everything I needed out of an airline at reasonable costs.  Spirit and Frontier never could accomplish the things AirTran did, and AirTran did so well, they got assimilated into Southwest, who like Microsoft or Adobe basically did in so in order to kill a competitor.

Regardless of what happens to Southwest’s business in the future, if there was ever a bigger red flag of how they could become the next Spirit, look no further than the terminal incident out of Orlando, where a Southwest passenger went ballistic, and assaulted a terminal worker, as well as smashed up some monitors.  It’s funny because if this were actually Spirit, the lady would have been tazed and arrested within moments of the first aggression, but it’s like Southwest still has a lot to learn about unruly passengers, and she went unchecked for a while before presumably getting dealt with long after the cameras stopped rolling.

But if Southwest continues down this downward spiral, anticipate way more of this bullshit, and their gates will become the future places to meander to when you have a long wait before your flight after Spirit is gone, with hopes that you might see a street fight or a massive hot mess passenger meltdown.

Look out, tough guy Bryce Harper

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

ESPN: Philadelphia Phillies’ Bryce Harper ‘cusses out’ MLB commissioner Rob Manfred in regard to the topic of a salary cap

When I came across this story over feeds fed to me over social media, I had some knee-jerk reactions that I debated on commenting in some of the communities in which I saw them.  But over the passage of time, I’ve learned to be mindful of audiences, specifically understanding that certain sources have certain readers who tend to get hivemind-ey about their opinions, and daring to say anything challenging to the collective results in unproductive, attack-oriented rebuttals.

Frankly, it always serves as a reminder to why I have a brog in the first place whenever I get shitpost rebuttals from internet trogdolytes who have zero ability to make their own thoughts and exist solely to respond in the contrary to the original thoughts of others.

I have a lot of thoughts about this story about Bryce Harper vs. Rob Manfred, but mostly I have a hard time getting over the whole part of the story where a 32-year old Bryce Harper got way up into the grill of a 66-year old Rob Manfred, in an obvious act of attempted intimidation, going nose-to-nose with a man over twice his age, and thinking it was a good idea in the first place.

Admittedly, I’ve had some back-and-forth opinion about Harper throughout the years, he’s an unbelievably good baseball player, and I can admire the amount of passion he demonstrated with embarking on a mission to bring championship success to Philadelphia, despite the fact that I am rooting against such.  But that passion also goes both ways, where at times he comes off as a completely unhinged hothead, prone to enraged outbursts, sometimes justifiable, but still a bad look to be seen screaming obscenities and throwing equipment around, really leaning into that hard-nosed archetype that Philadelphians tend to really love.

But the first thoughts that ran through my head upon reading about Harper’s aggressive approach with Rob Manfred was whoa, tough guy here, getting into the grill of a 66-year old man.  Dropping f-bombs from the onset and telling him to get the fuck out of their clubhouse for daring to float the idea of a salary cap. 

And the best part was that the 66-year old Manfred reportedly responded that he would not, get the fuck out of here, and stood his ground against Harper, before another player’s cooler head prevailed and attempted to diffuse the situation by chiming in himself with questions of his own.  So, so much for Harper’s attempt to intimidate an old man, which is pretty hilarious as far as tragic failures go.

Continue reading “Look out, tough guy Bryce Harper” →

Professional athlete problems

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Newsweek: Pittsburgh Pirates outfielder reveals having a very specific no-trade clause; refusing to go to the Yankees, Mets, Blue Jays, Dodgers, Giants or Padres

Call me naïve, but I’ve always had the belief that it’s probably in our best interests to not put our employability at any sort of disadvantage, by doing things like putting in legal writing, refusal to go work for specific employers.  I have a wife and kids, and when the day is over, my obligations is to provide and support and I don’t really think I’m above any particular task or duty in order to accomplish such. 

Sure, there are lots of things I’d rather not do, or places or companies that I’d probably hope to have a superior alternative to, but when push comes to shove, I’ll shovel shit eight hours a day if it meant being able to provide for my family, and do my best to be the absolute best at it.

Then again, I am not a professional athlete, paid exorbitant amounts of money to play sports originating from children’s games.  I have not lost touch with poverty, living paycheck to paycheck, and the constant vigilance of every penny spent.

I am not Pittsburgh Pirates outfielder, Bryan Reynolds, who for whatever reason is very adamant about not wanting to play for a specific list of teams, effectively implying to 1/5 of Major League Baseball that he’d rather be unemployed than play for any of them.  Which to someone like me, is mind-blowing that any player would have no-trade clauses in the first place, because unless they’re true MVP-caliber talent (which Reynolds is not), they’re not going to be endearing themselves to organizations by being inflexible.

What the internet is fascinated by is the list of teams; typically lots of guys who have had no-trade clauses in the past, they typically tend to list off teams generally perceived negatively by the masses; be it that they’re cheap teams, not good teams, in smaller markets, or any combination of the above.  After all, professional athletes play to win, to make money, enjoy their lives, or, any combination of the above.

But the teams Reynolds listed: the Yankees, Mets, Blue Jays, Dodgers, Giants and Padres – very few of the negatives really apply to them, and very much of the positives do.  Currently, all of them are either division leaders or are very much in the postseason picture, and they’re all squads based out of major New York and California markets or Toronto.  All of these teams are very liberal with their spending and all have budgets north of the median MLB payroll.

The immediate joke was that Bryan Reynolds has no actual desire to win, or be a part of a championship squad, seeing as how he plays for the perpetually middling Pittsburgh Pirates, and seems to only refuse to go to squads known for contending.  And the funniest thing is that when called out for such, by once-peers, Reynolds has gone out of his way to defend himself on the internet, validating the idea that he does in fact pay attention to the internet and what others might be saying about him, thus making him owned, but that’s beside the point.

Nerds on the internet were quick to point out that the list of teams Reynolds refuses accept trades to, correlates with high income tax rates, which New York and California do have, and Toronto being in Canada, is subject to massive taxation, which I guess does suck for an American paying Canadian taxes and getting no benefits for it.

However, Bryan Reynolds is a professional athlete, making professional athlete money, netting $12.25M this season and will continue to make more, over the next five years, as he signed an eight-year, $108M deal back in 2023.  Yes, it sucks to know that 40-50% of your income is immediately lost to Uncle Sam, but when the day is over, he’s still pulling in $6M+ a year after that motherfucker takes his pound of flesh.  

It’s hard to feel much empathy for any professional athlete making millions of dollars to play children’s games, and it’s extra puzzling how stingy it would be if income taxes really were the reason why he would block a trade to six of the upper tier of MLB franchises, where he would not only continue to make the contractually obligated millions he’s owed, but he could improve his general brand and parlay it into higher earning opportunities in stronger markets.

What’s funny to me however, is the fact that I don’t know if it’s ignorance or maybe he only does want to play for non-contending losers, but the Oakland Las Vegas Sacramento The A’s are not on his list.  The Dodgers, Padres and Giants being on it makes it sound like he’s avoiding California, but for the next three years, the A’s are still in the state, playing in a very fitting minor league ballpark, considering how the franchise is operated, and it would be hilarious if Bryan Reynolds were to get shipped out there, and his no-trade clause wouldn’t be able to prevent it from happening.  He would then be subject to California’s 13.3% income tax rate, and he’d be playing in a minor league ballpark, for a glorified minor league franchise.

Furthermore, I knew nothing about the guy before finding out about this story, but it’s interesting to deduce his journey through his statistics alone.  He debuted in 2019, had three well above average seasons with one injury-marred flop in the middle, but impressive enough to make the Pirates offer him a huge nine-figure deal to buy out his arbitration seasons and secure him for the next eight.  And in classic, got-the-bag player performance, he has two okay seasons but aren’t even close to the heights he reached in his 6.0 bWAR 2021 season, but apparently the man has fallen off a cliff in this 2025 season, already worth a horrendous -0.7 bWAR at the time I’m writing this.

He’s still going to be due nearly $75M over the next six seasons, and considering the downward trend he’s headed now, it’ll probably be the last big money he’s going to make in his career, so I suppose he should be trying his best to avoid getting shipped off to somewhere where nearly half of it is going to be assimilated by the IRS.

Either way, my final word on Bryan Reynolds is that man be dumb, blacklisting some of the richest and contending teams in the league.  There’s nothing inherently wrong with being in it just to make money, but me personally, anyone who doesn’t want to win while getting rich is missing something, and I’d rather them get the fuck out and make way for someone who wants everything including the bag.

When the Pirates do inevitably move him, because he still fits the mold of a good trade chip, I hope he gets shipped off to The A’s, Rockies, White Sox, Marlins or some other shitty mid franchise who have no desire to win.  To which, at this point in time, the Braves would actually be a club that might work with him, but here’s hoping that doesn’t happen, because I sure as fuck don’t want a dork like him.

The 2025 MLB All-Dead Money Team, starring Stephen Strasburg

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

When I was putting together my annual Bobby Bonilla Day post, I noticed just how much retained/dead money salaries existed in the MLB ecosystem.  At first, I was going to add it onto the Bobby Bonilla Day post, but as I was typing away, I realized that it had some legs to stand on its own, so I decided to ultimately break it off and let it fly and artificially inflate my post count that doesn’t matter to anyone else on the planet but me.

So as kind of an addendum to the Bobby Bonilla Day post, the topic this post is retained salaries, which I like to simply consider, dead money.

While combing through salary information, I noticed almost as frequent amounts of cases of retained/dead money on most teams, and this is different from deferred money because these payment obligations are not predetermined and agreed upon so much as they’re salaries that teams agree to be responsible for in exchange for these talents to be cut and free up the roster space.

That being said, there were 24 players spanning 18 teams who are getting paid despite in most cases, not being on a Major League roster, or even actively playing at all.  Combing through the names and cases, there are typically two primary camps of retained/dead money: young prospects who clearly have savvy agents who managed to get them guaranteed salary numbers, but they proved to not be ready for the Major Leagues yet, got demoted or cut, but the team was still on the hook.  Or, there are veterans with substantial money, that in most cases, fell off a cliff, got injured, and the team preferred to cut them and eat the salary just to free up the roster spot.

Naturally, 24 players is almost a roster, so here we go again – the 2024 All-Retained, All-Dead Money Starting Lineup that actually has a catcher:

Pos. Name Salary Team Retired?
C Matt Thaiss † $100K CHW/LAA Active
1B Eric Hosmer † $17.9K BOS/SDP 2023
2B Isiah Kiner-Falefa $1.2 PIT Active
3B Nolan Arenado † $5.0M COL Active
SS Wander Franco $16.5 TBR 2023
OF Mitch Haniger $14.5M SEA Active
OF Cody Bellinger $2.5M CHC Active
OF Aaron Hicks $10.7M NYY 2024
DH Jose Abreu † $19.5M HOU 2024
SP Stephen Strasburg $35.0M WAS 2022
SP Nestor Cortes $2.0M NYY Active
RP Ryan Pressley $5.5M HOU Active
RP Taylor Rogers $6.0M SFG Active
Reserves
INF Andres Giminez $1.0M TOR Active
OF Jorge Soler $1.9M SFG Active

†denotes player receiving multiple paychecks

So as you might be able to see, there’s an absurd roster to be constructed from the dead money alone, and further illustrates the egregious amounts of financial waste that exists in the constructs of Major League Baseball, as well as professional sports itself.  Sure, nobody should be obligated to work for free, and I too believe in the idea of past services rendered pay, when players are generally paupers on their minors to majors journey, if they even make it, but there are some dudes who simply don’t need the money and should probably feel ashamed to be accepting it.

Of course, I’m mostly referring to pitcher Stephen Strasburg, who is going to be making $35M from the Washington Nationals (bringing their total sunk cost amount to $60M).  Yes, the man carried the team to a World Series in 2019, and at that point, had already cleared $80M in career earnings.  Since then, he has suffered constant injuries and can no longer play baseball, but somehow the Nats are still on the hook for his retained salary until 2027, in which he will start making deferred payments from them instead.  At this time he has tripled his career earnings, and by the time the Nationals are done being handcuffed to him, he will nearly have quadrupled.

Wander Franco is a unique case, because his salary is probably going to be refunded to the Rays on account of his sexual deviancy scandal which has him out of baseball outright currently, but he still shows up on their books for the time being.

Matt Thaiss is a guy I’ve never heard of in my life, which added to my surprise at seeing him appear twice in retained lists, for both the Angels and the White Sox.  He’s a journeyman catcher who really isn’t good, but as documented, catching is the thankless position, so he seems to have always managed to have a job.  But his agent clearly seemed to be clever enough to ensure that he still got a paycheck, and although both teams are only on the hook for $50K a piece, which is pennies to a Major League squad, $100K to play baseball is still the dream, and why Thaiss makes a roster at all.

As far as dead money goes, there’s about $146,789,000 of it on the books of these 18 teams.  That would rank 16th in MLB payrolls, higher than 14 other teams.

Which brings me to one final observation before I begin to wrap all this up: six teams managed to have absolutely no deferred money obligations, nor did they have any dead money retained salaries.  The A’s, the Detroit Tigers, the Kansas City Royals, the Miami Marlins, the Texas Rangers, and of course, the Atlanta Braves.

People accuse me of being pessimistic and curmudgeon about the Braves and their perception that they don’t spend money, but it all comes from actual evidence.  The team is so risk-averse and absolutely unwilling to compete when it comes to any transaction that requires them to open their wallets.  There’s zero creativity when it comes to paying people, and as a result they lose out on every free agent that could possibly help them, and it’s laugh-worthy whenever the Braves’ name is mentioned an interested party in any available free agent.

As much as baseball nerds love to debate and typically applaud teams for smart spending, as it’s demonstrating more and more these days, sometimes you have to spend some money in order to get results.  Everyone may hate the Dodgers for committing a billion dollars to their roster, but there’s little reason to believe that they’re not going to cruise to the playoffs this year, and every foreseeable year afterward.  And when their payments start to come due in the 2030’s, they’re no guarantee to turn into the 2010s Phillies, because they have smart, creative people in their free agent that aren’t afraid to find alternative ways in order to remain competitive.

The six teams that have no debts whatsoever, I don’t really see that as much of a good thing as much as I see six franchises that are cowards when it comes to spending money, and more interested in finding the perfect balance of maintaining a baseball club while padding the pockets of investors.  The challenge as fans is to able to sift through the context, and find out how much teams feed us bullshit, versus how much they’re actually willing to invest.

Anyway, much like Bobby Bonilla Day, when it comes to retained salaries, there’s a tremendous amount of waste here as well.  I don’t know if I will do this one on an annual basis, because I found that writing about this topic dregs up more angst and venom towards the Braves than any Braves fan really should have towards the team they’re actually fans of.

Perhaps if they haven’t been underperforming as much as their roster’s potential could be great, I wouldn’t feel this way, but we’ll see where we land this time next season.

Bobby Bonilla Day presents the 2025 MLB All-Deferred Money Team

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

It’s that time of the year again, where Bobby Bonilla collects two big* paychecks from the New York Mets and Baltimore Orioles for playing baseball despite the fact that he’s 62 years old today and hasn’t played baseball since 2001; and I trot out this annual post to put on blast just how stupid and egregious that baseball salaries continuously escalate.

*$1,193,248 from the Mets and $500,000 from the O’s; paltry in the grand spectrum of MLB salaries, but still tremendously more than what successful doctors, teachers and actual essential personnel in the real working world make

It’s funny this year, because of the Dodgers’ absolute bonkers spending spree, and spamming of salary deferral, the whole concept of deferring salaries has come under a massively public microscope.  Most old nerdy fans like me know it’s all well within the rules and that any team in the league can employ it, and as I’ve documented, many have throughout the years, but nobody has really done it to the effect of the Dodgers have over the last offseason, promising out over a billion dollars to several players that will be paid out mostly between the years of 2030 through like, the end of the human race, at the rate we’re going.

But even in spite of the Dodgers’ deferral spree they went on this year, in the grand spectrum of the 2025 season, the Dodgers are but just a mere blip on the radar in the master list of deferrals, as well as dead money throughout the league.  Granted, this will change dramatically in the 2030’s, when Bobby Bonilla’s contract finally ends, and the Dodgers’ deferrals start to kick in and I’ll probably have to change the name of these posts from “Bobby Bonilla Day” to “the Dodgers present,” but until then, there’s still a lot of life in this little exercise continuing to be named after Bobby Bo.

Anyway, on with the show.

In the 2025 season, there are 24 players making deferred monies, according to Spotrac, spread between 14 teams.  Compared to last year, this is one less player and one less team, primarily on account of Ken Griffey Jr. finally coming off the Cincinnati Reds’ books despite not having played since 2010.  I made a joke last year that it was perfect that it was 25 players, since rosters (used to be) are 25-man rosters (with a 26th injured reserve spot).

However, in spite of the one fewer player and one fewer team, these 24 players are making an estimated $83.156M, which is a higher payroll than three teams’ total payrolls: the Chicago White Sox, Miami Marlins of course, the Oakland the Sacramento The A’s.  Barely avoiding the embarrassment of being outspent by a roster of deferred salaries are the Tampa Bay Rays and Pittsburgh Pirates.

Continue reading “Bobby Bonilla Day presents the 2025 MLB All-Deferred Money Team” →

Tin foil hat theory time

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Apparently, a home very close to my home was victim to a drive-by shooting last night.  0.8 mi from my house to be precise, but not in my subdivision.  This is the kind of thing that I would have expected to hear happening in my old neighborhood and most definitely not something where I currently live, where the crime rate is pretty low, and incidents like this occurring are extremely few and far between.

The good news is that despite there being gunfire, nobody appears to have been hurt, and the assailants have been caught by the police.  The article states that the victims of the shooting did not know the attackers, which it’s hard to know what to believe, because otherwise why would a car full of people come to a house in the middle of the night and just unload gunfire on the property if there were no connection whatsoever?

Either way, it’s disheartening to hear of such senseless violence and gunfire occurring in my generally otherwise peaceful community, but this is where the conspiracy theorist in me begins to come out to try and make sense of the incident.

See, unbeknownst to the news article, and what those who don’t live around the area are aware of is the fact that the home that was attacked, is also on the market.  I know this, because I drive past this house on a regular basis, going to and from the office, most of the time when I run errands; I drive past this home regularly and often.  According to Zillow, the attacked home was listed as pending, but I have to imagine that once the police report becomes public and the party who made the offer finds out about this incident, it probably won’t be pending for much longer.

Inevitably, the value of the home will most likely take a substantial hit in price, and the poor family who was probably hoping to capitalize on the still-seller’s market will have their hopes stepped on when they’ll have to drop the price in order to compensate for the fact that the property was just freshly involved in a drive-by shooting incident.

Additionally, across the street from this home, and within the next four lots are two properties also on the market, with one of them being under contract currently.  Granted, one of them is solely a plot of land, but I have to imagine that even land is affected by incidents of crime, since those whom might want to built a home on said land, would still might be unnerved building right across the street of a home that was shot up in the middle of the night.

So what I’m thinking here is that, in this day and age where big, evil, soulless property investors who go around hoovering up property and effectively cockblocking tens of thousands of Americans from becoming homeowners, one of the more nefarious and lacking in any sort of ethical practices investment companies, set all this shit up.  Set up some expendable fall guys to go shoot up an innocent home on the market, drive down its market value, as well as the value of any nearby properties, and then swoop in and pick them all up while they’re all forced to discount on account of fresh crime.

For all I know, the pending offers on the victim and the nearby unit were the same party, and they’ll pull out now that some big and bad albeit orchestrated crime has occurred, but they’ll wait in the wings for the prices to come down and then swoop back into the fray and make some lowball offers and get the homes at a deep discount.

Not very likely, but I also don’t think it’s entirely unrealistic either.  The real answer will be when inevitably when all these available properties eventually flip, if they’re bought up by actual human beings, or if they’re picked up by some ambiguously named entity that is code for asshole investor.

Regardless, this whole situation sucks, hearing of gun violence so close to my home, shattering the façade of peace and tranquility, especially after I left a real warzone to come to where I am now.  And of course, if the victim family really didn’t know the assailants, the fact that they were just picked to be target practice for a car full of psychos, regardless of if this was orchestrated by some shady shitty investors or not.

#TRYHARDSZN2025: This, is going to be my favorite story this #SZN

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Trent Crimm, the Independent: braggadocious teen mogul goes viral after being rejected by nearly all applied colleges, in spite of monumental qualifications

I’m just going to go out on a limb here and say that I don’t think any story for the rest of the #SZN is going to top this one.  Sure, the #TRYHARD only applied to 18 schools, but he was rejected by 15 of them, despite having incredible qualifications as far as grades, accomplishments and frankly, life experiences went.

What we have here, is probably one of the greatest examples in history of how the wrong attitude and approach can absolutely shitcan your chances of acceptance in the real world, because if you were to take the time to read this article and read his college essay, that he thinks he’s so important as to call his personal statement, it becomes absolutely crystal clear to why this he was rejected by nearly every school he applied to, despite having excellent grades, tests well, and the intelligence and savvy to become a young entrepreneur of a successful and profitable app.

Many have already pointed out and dissected all of the numerous reasons to why this #TRYHARD was shot down in such embarrassingly overwhelming fashion, but it really boils down to the fact that his college essay absolutely turned off just about every single recruiter with any pull or power to accept.

He basically shits on the whole notion of going to college, proclaims he had no intention of going to college, and sees college as simply ‘a rite of passage’ for teenagers growing up.  Absolutely no college in America would want to admit some kid who has no real aspirations once they’re in the door, and comes off as a massive flight-risk of dropping out, because he already has success and earning potential in his life right now.

It feels like he’s watched too many rite of passage movies, where plots of claimed that in order to stand out in the college application process, one has to be bold, take chances, and tell an incredible story.  As insufferably braggadocious his essay is, it’s extremely well written, reads well and tells a story, but the fact of the matter is that real life isn’t a movie, and there’s a level of vanilla, boring decorum that is expected, and frankly required, when doing things like applying to colleges or jobs. 

Proclaiming your disinterest for college and then bragging about all the reasons why you feel that way before saying “but oh wait, college is a rite of passage so I guess I should do it” wasn’t the right choice, and I’m honestly more flabbergasted at the fact that this #TRYHARD didn’t have anyone in his life to give him the guidance or advice that, yo, maybe this essay isn’t the right approach. 

I got the vibe that this kid has probably been raised with little emperor syndrome, which is pretty common in lots of Chinese and Middle Eastern cultures, where the first born son is basically invincible from criticism and coddled and sheltered from real world scenarios, and if he even sought any guidance about his essay, was probably told it was great and to run with it.  Oops.

What’s funnier is the fact that this #TRYHARD took his beef to the internet, with the implication being that he genuinely thought the collective internet would really be on his side once he made his story public.  As tone-deaf and clearly blind to understanding how the college application process works, he’s clearly as clueless to how the internet works, and in no time flat, he’s been dismantled, dissected and picked apart by the internet, with as much success finding people who sympathize with him as he was accepted into schools.

On a side note, yeah the #TRYHARD biffed on all of the Ivies he tried to get into, but kind of a low-blow by the Independent to throw shade at the schools he did get into, calling Georgia Tech, the U and Texas “less prestigious” schools.  I mean, they are less prestigious schools as far as not being Ivy League, but they’re all solid educational institutions, with excellent specific programs, and all flush with cash on account of robust athletic programs.  And they all clearly were capable of looking past his shit attitude and see the potential, and gave him the green light, when better or equally qualified applicants probably didn’t.

I know I take shots at Georgia Tech all the time, but there’s no denying the school is among the top engineering schools in the country, and it might have the name value of MIT, but it’s no slouch as far as its educational credentials are concerned.

Frankly, #TRYHARD here has two options – forego college like he believed he was destined to do, focus on his app and ecommerce acumen, and follow the path of Zuck and become wealth and something without a college degree.  Or, attend Georgia Tech and get an excellent education, go to Texas and soak in the college sport and immersive college atmosphere, or go to the U, where he’d be living in Miami and lean into Miami living.

As owned as he might have been in the college applications game, and on the internet, he’s still in a very enviable position overall.  He has acceptances to some “less prestigious” but reputable schools, basically his own business, and he’s still just 18 years old.  There’s a tremendous time for him to learn and grow and grow the fuck up, and this would be a critical year and good basis for him to punt on 2025, take a gap year and try again the next year, and find some humility and perhaps use this experience as a means to write an essay that’s not quite so insufferable as much as demonstrating the experience of being humbled and growing from it.

Either way, who doesn’t love a good story of some dumbass getting owned?  And even better that it falls within the realm of #TRYHARDSZN, and ultimately is an opposite-story of instead of some #TRYHARD getting into 155 schools and amassing millions in cumulative scholarship offers, it’s someone who got rejected by a bunch of schools, and entirely because of his own stupidity.