I love seeing photos of dejected fans. It almost doesn’t matter what sport it is, as long as there is disappointment, sometimes tears, and people being miserable, it makes me happy, as the sadistic, misery-seeking societal troll I can sometimes be.
This time however, is doubly good, because it’s Seahawks fans being mopey and miserable, pretty much under the perfect storm of circumstances in which this could possibly be the end result: victory all but inevitable, with the Seahawks two yards away from the game-winning touchdown, only seconds after a miracle of a catch, guaranteed to be immortalized in championship packages for decades if and when they completed the comeback victory, only to watch it all vanish in the blink of an eye as a result of what’s being already hailed as the worst play call in history when the Patriots intercepted the ball and sealed the game.
Seriously, the Seachickens had four downs to gain a half yard, 18 inches, while having the current best running back in the game who also happens to be an impending free agent, which means he would have guaranteed gotten into the end zone on at least four attempts, and the Seachickens and their legions of bandwagon fans would have been able to boast about being repeat Super Bowl champions.
But instead, Pete Carroll, Russell Wilson and GOD decided to, for whatever inconceivable reason, decided to go for a passing play, which as we all know by now, backfired to monumentally critically failing proportions.
I’d be skeptical about one or both of their bank accounts having their available balances increasing over the next few weeks, because it really was that bad of a call that a payoff doesn’t seem out of the question.
Anyway, I’ve been getting asked a lot lately, why I’m so happy that the Seachickens lost. The answer’s quite simple, I root against any team that I feel has obnoxious fans. Usually, the obnoxious tends to grow when a team tastes success, or they have a player with so much of a certain type of charisma that they lend to entire fanbases a sense of swagger that becomes obnoxious. Sometimes, both.
Actually, my biases against entire sporting franchises tend to be most of the time on account of fanbases, and not so much the actions or players of the teams themselves. I couldn’t stand the Phillies when they were good, because their fans were so smug and obnoxious as long as they kept winning (it should be noted that now that they suck again, Phillies fans have been in hibernation since). Subsequently, I can’t stand the San Francisco Giants right now, because they win literally every other year, which is the perfect interval for them to be smug and obnoxious for two years before they get to do it all over again. The smugness carries over towards their football team, which is why I dislike the 49ers, because they too have obnoxious fans who I want to see nothing more than to be disappointed.
Regardless, I’m just happy that the Seachickens lost, because if for anything at all, it’s so that their obnoxious bandwagon fans taste the epitomic agony of defeat – being so close to victory, so close, only for it to all come to a sudden, abrupt end. I mean, these are people who have no idea what their old uniforms looked like, who Matt Hasselbeck is, understand the irony behind “we want the ball and we’re going to score,” realize that they had Shaun Alexander who broke the NFL record for TDs in a season once, and that at one point, they had the greatest wide receiver in the game grace their team for a brief spell.
I for one, am enjoying the sound of hundreds of thousands of people quickly jumping off of the bandwagon after such a demoralizing loss.
That Tom Brady guy is pretty good at football, after all, huh?
