It’s been a while since I’ve felt the inner need to do one of these, but at the same time, it’s been a while since I last posted too. Not a day goes by when I don’t notice when I post, but between my job entering our busy season, the general busy-ness of raising an infant daughter, night classes, and I do mean night classes seeing as how they’re 9-11 pm, taking up two nights a week with often other nights of the week doing homework for said night classes, as I’ve stated a gabillion times at this point, I simply just don’t have any time.
And with what free time I do have, I’m either usually too gassed and fried in the brain to want to sit down and try and gather my thoughts and write about things especially when feeling unmotivated in the first place, and so I usually end up fast-forwarding through the week’s wrestling programs and when I have them available, catching up on TLC programming like My 600 lb. Life and 90 Day Fiancé. And as much as I hate to constantly lean on wrestling and TLC to find things to about write about, I can’t remember the last time I had leisurely time to just casually surf the internet for local happenings to rap on, and often times general news around the rest of the world is usually sad and infuriating in the first place and I don’t want to feed into negativity that I can simply avoid.
One day, maybe, I’ll have more free time to write again in the future. For the sake of my own sanity and gratification, I certainly hope so.
Anyway, first thing I had earmarked wanting to opine about was the Miz cashing in Money in the Bank, and winning the WWE championship. To the casual fan, this was likely done to try to infuriate and bother fans, but to an old jaded mark like myself, I’m actually very okay with it. Frankly, I so often hear rumblings and quips about how the WWE is in disarray, and how they’re creatively stagnant and all sorts of rhetoric about how the company is in trouble, which is never the case, since the WWE is liquid and can and has adapted to just about everything in history in some way shape or form.
Regardless, I would acquiesce on the idea that they’re a little stagnant on the creative side, and as I’ve always described the Money in the Bank briefcase, it’s basically the creative get out of jail free card that the company always has in their back pocket for times just like this. Frankly, due to coronavirus, and a slightly more rigid roster, things have the capability of growing stale pretty quickly, especially if the performers are not performing up to the expected par.
Drew McIntyre is a worthy champion in my opinion, but by no fault of his own, hasn’t really been booked to his potential, and unfortunately by result of that, it seems like Creative has decided to punt on him, get the belt off of him, and have him go through the timeless narrative of a hero working their way back up to the top. The Miz is the perfect kind of guy to make the weasel-ey bad guy World champion, since he’s got a consistent skill set, is dynamite on the mic, and has the creativity and improvisational ability to work with just about anyone until it’s time for him to move the belt onto the next babyface.
And frankly, I like the Miz as a performer, and I like the idea that he’s being rewarded for his longevity, consistency, and contributions to the company after all this time. Mostly because of his history and his style, I don’t think he gets enough credit for what he has accomplished, but the most important thing is that he’s been on and running very stable for the better part of the last decade, throughout all sorts of era switches, the pandemic and roster turnover, and I’m completely okay with him getting another World title reign to pad his growing legacy with.
One thing I’m not really completely okay with is the NXT UK Tag Team championship, going over onto Pretty Deadly. Not because I think their gimmick is shitty, although they are pretty uncreative and boring as performers, but because I think they’re greener than two Lex Lugers.
Throughout the years, NXT was at first their developmental territory, but then turned into their holding pen for newly acquired free agent performers until they were ready to be inserted into main roster storylines, and now it’s the official third brand of the company, ripe with talent and independent storylines that occasionally cross over onto the main roster.
NXT UK emerged, and there is undoubtedly some tremendous talent that resides over there, but part of the charm of UK is that it kind of once again feels developmental, and there’s a grass-roots kind of atmosphere to it. That said, I would definitely put Pretty Deadly in that category of being very much still developmental, and do object to the idea of them carrying any sort of championship gold at this point in their careers.
But considering the roster is thinner than rice paper right now, I’m guessing that it was done primarily out of a lack of roster depth, and by taking them off of Gallus, the kayfabe injury of Joe Coffey, and the fact that all three of them are seasoned pros, I’m going to assume that the WWE is preparing them for a move across the pond, and they’ll probably emerge in the United States within a few months to bolster a roster stateside.
It doesn’t change however, the fact that the championships reside on a green-ass team like Pretty Deadly. Neither of them are impressive in the ring, aren’t particularly interesting on the mic, but considering the sheer lack of depth in the entire brand, there really weren’t any other alternatives.
And finally, a brief update on My 600 lb. Life, season 9: We’re nine episodes in, and are still at a 100% failure rate in that not a single person on the show has successfully made it onto the surgery table and gotten weight loss surgery. I know coronavirus is real and has decimated their ability to find and actually document any subjects, but going a whole season where everyone is failing left and right is still unprecedented. I can’t imagine there’s more than 1-3 more episodes left in the season, and I’m growing excited at the idea of an entire season happening with a 0% success rate. Unbelievable!
