Just stop pls

Impetus: Georgia Department of Transportation to spend about $356,000 painting markings and clarifying lanes on the I-85/I-75 Downtown Connector to help attempt alleviate extraneous traffic caused by people changing lanes.

GDOT seems to think that traffic is caused by people who don’t know where they’re going, basically.  That’s why they think that spending a boatload of money to try and clarify directions better than it already is, would theoretically alleviate such congestion.

Such might be the case, as I-85 and I-75 are both major veins throughout the southeastern United States, but I have to believe it to be the vast minority of traffic causes.

Here’s the thing though: the extraneous traffic throughout Atlanta is often times caused by people who know exactly where they’re going.  It’s the people who know where they are, and how they’re going maneuver through traffic that are the ones who are weaving and freaking out less-competent drivers with their aggression; because they know exactly where they are, and how much space they have to work with to get from point A to point B the quickest.

I see it all the time on the Connector; sitting in the right lanes, because I’m preparing on going to I-75, when someone behind me whips out of the lane, floors it past me, and I can see that moments before the split occurs, they dash back into I-75, and are now several car lengths ahead of me, completely ignorant of the fact that they had to use the shoulder and make three people pump their brakes in order to accommodate their maneuver.

The bottom line is that this is ultimately a gigantic waste of money for GDOT and the rest of the state.  They think that they’re going to educate people into becoming more vigilant drivers on the Connector, but what they’re really going to accomplish is in the short term, lots of lane closures, headaches, rage and anxiety, and in the long term, nothing, because it’s not the people who don’t know where they’re going that causes traffic, it’s the people that do, and abuse the Connector’s expanse to traverse the roads fastest.

For once, I agree with the Mayor

In short: the idea of an Atlanta casino has been planted, but Atlanta Mayor Kasim Reed is reluctant about it, in spite of differing, majority opinion.

I’ve already said that I am on the side of the fence that is against the idea of an MGM casino in Atlanta.  I’m actually kind of surprised that that opinion is kind of echoed by what the mayor feels about it:

“I’m not there on gaming at all. I believe Las Vegas is in Las Vegas for a reason,” the mayor said. “I just have real issues setting a facility in Atlanta where working folks get off work and walk into a gaming casino.”

I mean, I still think Kasim Reed is money-grubbing moron, obsessed with sporting venues and the high probability that he’s profitting massively under the table with them, but I’m pleasantly surprised to see that he and I have a similar thought about a casino coming to Atlanta.

Ultimately, this is the real impetus to why I wanted to write this post, but at the same time, I would be remiss to not point out some other lol-worthy things brought up on his article.  Namely, this particularly ironically silly quote from an alleged long-time resident of the neighborhood surrounding Turner Field, the proposed potential area for a casino once the Braves white-flight themselves to Cobb County:

“None of us want to live on frat row,” said one long-time resident.

The context behind this statement is that alternatively to a casino being built on the soon-vacated Turner Field property, would be that nearby Georgia State Unviersity wants to buy the land and turn it into a multi-use property which would contain sporting complexes, student housing and retail establishments.

Basically, this long-time resident seems to think that a casino crowd is preferable over college students.  Obviously oblivious to the fact that lots of casino crowds ARE college students, but worse, because they’re often times fueled by comped alcohol.

I mean given the state of the Summerhill community now, pretty much anything is better than what it is now, which is a tragic ghetto.

In the end, it doesn’t matter what I think, or anyone else thinks, because money is going to drive the decision of what ultimately ends up there, whether it’s a casino, or a whole bunch of college town.  Hopefully, those in charge of making that eventual decision think more along the side of the mayor and I, and hoping Las Vegas stays out in Las Vegas, instead of populating a piece in our city.

Oh god please not Married… With Children too

TL:DR: David “Bud Bundy” Faustino claims to be working on a spin-off of Married… With Children.

First it was Girl Meets World and then it was Fuller House.  But please god no, not Married… With Children too.
And of course it’s Bud Bundy who has his name all over this likely debacle.  Ed O’Neill has Modern Family under his belt, Katey Segal has a decade of Futurama money rolling in, and Christina Applegate actually has somewhat of a movie career.  David Faustino has basically done nothing since MWC, and it’s of absolutely no surprise at all that he’s the one behind making a possible spin-off of what made him anything at all.

Needless to say, this has “disaster” written all over it.  I mean, what could a possible spin-off possibly be about?  If it’s anything like any of the other shows that are underway with spin-offs, it’s going to basically be a modernized re-telling of the original shows, peppered with cameos from original cast members, but more or less the same songs and dances.

That being said, Disaster… With Children is basically going to be about a grown-up Bud Bundy, who has a vapid and lazy wife that he will claim ruined his life and that he hates, but actually loves unconditionally, who feels the same way, a son and a daughter who are both underachievers, and two meddling neighbors.

But in light of changing things up so that the show doesn’t come under too much fire for trying to rip off the original formula, changes will be made; like instead of the wife pining for sex all the time, it will be Bud, being the sex-starved Bud of old, who will always be wanting sex, while his wife will find a million ways and one-liners to shoot him down.

Womens shoe salesman might have been a denigrating job back in the 80s, but Bud will have to be with the times and be something like, a call center guy or something thankless and mundane, like a graphic designer.

The son will be the older child this time, but the dynamic probably won’t change that much, and the daughter will still be attractive and promiscuous, likely played by an actress who will hope to use the show as a vehicle for future stardom while hoping to not get typecast. And Bud Jr. will be as big of a loser as his dad is/was, naturally.

The neighbors will probably be portrayed by a mixed ethnicity couple, but no less obnoxious and meddling.  I’m going to go out on a limb and say that the new D’arcys will be like fairly successful start-up company founders at first, but then flounder around into a variety of occupations throughout the “duration” (read: 5 episdoes before it gets the axe) of the series.  Instead of old gripes like stealing newspapers and siphoning their Mercedez’s fuel, they will barge into the scenes, complaining that the New Bundys are stealing their wifi, or that they don’t like Bud’s wife’s passive-aggressive Facebook posts about obviously them.

Ultimately, this theoretical sitcom is destined for failure, and frankly I’d rather the MWC franchise stay dead with what ironic integrity it had, than to be resurrected, and trotted out for a public shaming before being killed again.

Then again, considering the fact that David Faustino is steering this sinking ship, and it likely to star Bud Bundy, it’s kind of fitting that the least successful member of the franchise, both as a character and an actor, is behind it all.

GG Rito on Fiora’s rework

Impetus: Riot takes League of Legends character Fiora to the wood shed for a doozy of an update, both gameplay and visually.

Anyone want to take any bets on how I feel about this?

If you guessed “Danny hates it,” you’d be right.  Granted, it’s safe to assume that I’ll hate most things, because I’m kind of a cynical person, but the fact of the matter is that I really am disappointed in Riot for what they did to a character that I was pretty partial to.

In terms of gameplay, I agree that Fiora had been progressively left in the dust throughout the passage of time since her release, but it’s not like she was complete crap; for everything about her lack of mobility, escape or crowd control, she has always hit like a ton of bricks, and no matter what, if a game went long enough for her to get two or three core items, she is annihilating people, especially at the scrub-tier level in which I play.

With the way she was redesigned, Fiora has kind of been pigeon-holed into being nothing but a jungler.  I suck at jungling.  I suck at top-laning too for that matter, but in the few times in which I do play top, Fiora is one of the champions that I had played.

Seriously though, given the fact that her passive and ult rely on her being able to essentially walk around her opponent in hit them in any side of them aside from their front is pretty asinine.  There is no champion in the game that moonwalks or walks sideways like a crab, when an opponent is facing you, they are fucking facing you.  Nobody in their right mind, other than a deliberate feeder, is going to stand still, and let you waltz around to their backside or their flanks, and get in an auto attack, to proc Fiora’s passive or her ultimate ability.  No, they’re going to be rotating and facing you, so they can one, defend themselves, and two, blow you up, because this new kit is bigger bullshit than her former one.

Through jungling, and getting sneak attacks in, will Fiora’s kit of needing to attack random sides of a champion other than their front, be often doable, but the rest of her kit has been turned down to where she might not really be that great of a jungler, either.

Anyway, the bigger issue for me is the artistic rework. Obviously, I’ve had my objections to the Miss Fortune visual rework, especially the no-longer Secret Agent skin, but Fiora is a champ that I didn’t think needed any visual updating at all, period.

Honestly, I just don’t understand why Riot did it.  Other than an innate desire to have some visual uniformity throughout their character roster, I can’t think of any reason why they would go change her physical appearance.  Frankly, I’m not that big of a fan of the painterly-style they’re going with all new champions and visual updates, and I think they’re kind of copping out a lot of the time with artwork by sandwiching multiple champions into a single piece, and slicing out character portraits from them.  I get that with perhaps the special occasion skins, but it’s looking like it’s a matter of time until there’s going to be a visual update where all of House Demacia is one portrait, all of Noxus is one portrait, and then they just jerry-rig a bunch of champions and call them Bilgewater, regardless of if the lore ahead of them stated no affiliation.

The bottom line is that Fiora went from an aerodynamic-looking fencer, to a weird, tunic-wearing older woman, with lips full of collagen, and about eight years of age underneath the eyes.  To say that I am a fan of such a redesign would be like saying that I enjoy skipping my weekly weekend Willy’s burrito.

GG Rito, way to bastardize a champion that wasn’t relevant in the first place, and somehow manage to create even more reason to not play Fiora anymore.

Stating the smarky obvious

On this past RAW, John Cena cut a promo where he basically said everything smarky wrestling fans like me already knew: the United States championship is way more valuable than the World championship.  The thing is, up until last night, those are the kinds of things that the WWE, much less the wrestlers themselves aren’t necessarily supposed to acknowledge, especially on live television.

Needless to say, I found it very amusing, and one of those “Oooh” moments, but the formula doesn’t change; if the WWE is allowing it to happen, then it’s very much no longer breaking meta, it’s now a storyline.

The thing is that everyone knows it’s true, be it fans, the wrestlers, and the WWE organization itself.  The U.S. title is way more prestigious than the World championship is right now.  It’s just more amazing that they’re acknowledging it so blatantly on live TV.  It’s almost as if the WWE is trying to one of those preemptive power plays, where bringing the awareness to the forefront strips the power of it in the background, where an opinion like this would typically ferment.

Personally, I don’t dislike John Cena like the rest of the sheep pretend to hate him; he’s an extraordinary worker, still vastly at his physical prime, and is always striving to better and raise the bar while in the ring.  Sure, he’s a colossal tool as Total Divas portrays the “real” John Cena out to be; more businessman than actual human being, but the fact of the matter is that when the cameras are rolling, he refuses to let anyone overshadow him, elevating his game just a little bit more as the years have ticked by, and is still capable of delivering five-star matches on any given night, if the reigns are taken off.

With his current gimmick of the U.S. Title Open challenge, he’s been on RAW every single week, delivering a title defense against absolutely everyone, which had produced some fantastic matches that even a habitual 1.5x speed watcher like myself will stop, watch at regular speed, and enjoy the show.  Matches against Adrian Neville and Sami Zayn were top notch, the more-recent match against Cesaro was probably match of the year, and it’s even been used as vehicle to elevate intriguing storylines, like the introduction of Kevin Steen Owens to the main roster.

It goes without saying that the U.S. Title has been the most valuable asset to the company right now, with the level of talent performing their butts off in its name every single week.  All while the World championship picture is this stale circus revolving around Seth Rollins rants, Brock Lesnar rampages, and albeit awesome, Paul Heyman promos.

It’s kind of ironic, because the unspoken manifesto of the company following this past year’s Wrestlemania was that the World championship would be used to surround the young and promising talent of the future (Rollins, Dean Ambrose, Roman Reigns), while the “lower” tier belts, like the U.S. and Intercontinental, would be elevated a little bit, but to be more of a holdover prize for the old guard (Cena, Daniel Bryan).

Whether it’s on purpose, or the fact that guys like John Cena relish in the challenge of taking the lemon and making lemonade, it’s pretty damn clear where the power and prestige currently resides, when it comes to the values of the championships; and it’s certainly not the one with the giant company logo on it front and center.

I’m just surprised that the company itself went ahead and basically admit it on live television.