I love that free agents are getting owned

QQ moar: Chicago Cubs’ Kris Bryant publicly whines about how free agents are not getting signed as Spring Training gets closer and closer

First off, shut the fuck up, Kris Bryant.  You’re not even a free agent yet.  I understand why he’s complaining now, because he’s going to be a free agent in a year or two, I don’t care enough to check to see how many years of arbitration he has left, and he wants to make sure that when he hits the market, things won’t be like they are today, where free agents are absolutely getting taken to the toolshed for the second year in a row, and are not getting the absurd and ridiculous multi-million dollar contracts that nerds on the internet once said that they were all entitled to getting for their past performances.

But the thing is, Bryant is airing out his grievances under the guise of pretending like he cares about his fellow baseball players, namely the notable free agents whom are pretty much all still unsigned and have no definitive future currently, despite the fact that they’re absolutely going to get signed by someone, because their talents are inevitably going to be coveted by someone out there.  They might not get the $400 million people think some of them are worth in a contract, but I’m fairly confident nobody is going to shed any tears for them when they’re still going to sign for like $250 million.

Dollars.  Hundreds of millions of dollars.  That’s what some of these baseball players are going to sign for, all for being really good at playing a children’s game.  You’ll have to excuse me, and anyone else with a brain for not feeling sorry for baseball players who aren’t going to get $300 million, but are still going to make $175 million dollars for being good at swinging a bat or throwing a baseball.

As I always say, I love baseball, more than any other sport, but it doesn’t take a genius to understand that the salaries in baseball, as well as any other professional sport, are pretty out of hand these days, and I refuse to feel sorry or have any empathy for any professional athlete for not getting many-many millions of dollars, but are still getting many millions of dollars.

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Of course Stiffen Pippen thinks this

Impetus: former NBA great, Scottie Pippen, believes Duke’s Zion Williamson ‘has done enough’ to be the #1 pick in the NBA draft and should shut himself down now and not risk getting injured

To those who don’t know the context, Scottie Pippen is considered one of the cheapest men on the face of the planet.  Perhaps not quite as artificially manufactured enough to end up on an episode of Extreme Cheapskates, but he’s still notoriously cheap to where there are articles all over the internet about his cheapness, from his peers, and more notably, pretty much the entire restaurant industry.

Needless to say, when it comes to the topic of money, it shouldn’t be any surprise when Scottie Pippen’s stance is on whatever side banks the most amount of money with the smallest risk of losing it.

Like his opinion of Duke’s freshman superstar, Zion Williamson; he of the 6’7, 275 lb. man child who is still growing, and is currently tearing up NCAA basketball with his monster dunks and Mutombo-like rejections.  He’s played 16 games of college basketball, and has been putting up some prodigious numbers, but again, it’s just 16 games, in his first year of college ball.

But that’s more than enough for Stiffen Pippen, who’s completely convinced that he’s proven that he’s already worthy to be the consensus #1 draft pick in the next NBA Draft, and he’d be better off shutting it all down now, and preparing for the draft.  I have a hard time thinking of a more selfish and self-serving suggestion, and sure, there’s always the argument of what college does for a ringer student-athlete like Williamson, but still if you’re remotely close to my line of thinking, accomplish one fucking thing before screwing everyone around you.

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Could the XFL actually save football?

I’ve gone on record to say that I’ve typically been in the camp that I don’t think college athletes should be getting paid, because they’re in essence already being paid with college educations, room, board, feed and all sorts of non-monetary privileges that are the things that typically drown all ordinary people in student debt for the vast majority of their lives.

I’ve read numerous articles and arguments both for and against the idea of paying student-athletes, and I most certainly see both sides of the coin.  And although I still feel strongly that college players shouldn’t be paid money, I do feel like I’m softening on the idea that the reality still is that college players receive very little for their blood, sweat and tears, while the coaches, staff, schools and the fat cats of the NCAA are making literal millions of dollars.

I now think the idea of allowing players to make royalties off of their name is fair, and/or the idea that student-athletes should receive some sort of annuities or flexible scholarships that will allow them to protect their lives with educations and more usable degrees, instead of forcing them to make all sorts of essential decisions while they’re still eligible amateurs, often times still teenagers or just past.  The inequity of what students receive versus what the NCAA gets is wider than a Kardashian’s asshole and it just doesn’t seem right to me anymore.

However, going back to the headline of this post, shortly after Clemson put the finishing touches on Alabama in round 4, and winning their second National Championship (which is a disgusting thought in its own right but that’s another diatribe), the recently re-booted XFL made a strategically subtle reminder to the world, that they are “not restricted by the rules that exist in other professional football leagues,” which is basically saying “unlike the NFL, we don’t have rules saying you have to be X years old or have completed X number of years in college,” which to the ears of the young and ambitious sounds a lot like “you can go high school to pro and start getting paid sooner… in the XFL.”

Money is the impetus for everything in the rotten world we live in, and it goes to say that money is main reason for how the world of fútbol americano is the way it is today.  Underclassmen in the college ranks are coveted and exploited because they’re young, have fresh legs, and are malleable to a school’s system.  Subsequently, their young age makes them appealing to the professional ranks since their window of peak physical performance is open longer at 20 than it is at 22, so they can be exploited and milked for longer.

The rich get richer, which is why college football has seen four straight years of Alabama vs. Clemson.  Kids want to play for winners, which is why the top schools always have their veritable picks of the litter, with there being a trickle-down effect of the top prospects often times going to the most winning schools that will have them.  Upstarts often happen when the unheralded and underrated rise to their potentials, or more often times, when a disgruntled former prospect grows tired of riding the bench and being forced to wait their turn, and then they transfer to another school with hopes for actual playing time and exposure, but none of them in recent years have still been able to actually topple a powerhouse.

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Man, fuck NCR

In short: stuffy Fortune 500 company NCR settles agreement with neighboring longstanding mainstay gentlemen’s club The Cheetah, to remove their iconic rotating sign, presumably so it wasn’t so obvious that their fancy Midtown offices wasn’t practically right next to, a strip club

NCR is a company in which just hearing the name would probably elicit crickets from most people.  But NCR is also the company that makes products that all around the world, people have seen their products: card readers, ATM components, and all sorts of POS equipment.  Yeah, NCR is vastly responsible for the majority of that crap all across the globe.

They’re also a company that I have personally dealt with at a previous place I worked, and they were what I would describe as a problem child of a business to work with.  Nitpicky as all hell, demanding, inconsiderate of both time and resources, I spent many extra hours of my life working on their shit, and with each round of corrections, they demanded fresh hard copies of their training materials to review, no matter how small or inconsequential the changes were. 

No lie, I must’ve used at least two boxes of letter paper for just their training manuals alone, and that was just to develop them.  I can’t imagine how many trees had to die for these fucks to actually produce them after they were finalized and approved to send to the printer.

Frankly, I have no love lost for NCR.  I resent them as a company and I can’t help but twitch when I use a card somewhere and I catch a glimpse of their logo on the POS equipment that I have to use in order to finish a transaction.

But that was just how they affected me; and now they’re affecting the landscapes of our fair city, Atlanta?  By forcibly having removed, one of icons of the city, that was here long before they even had any consideration of coming into Atlanta?

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Plopicana Field

TL;DR: The home of the Tampa Bay Rays, Tropicana Field, decides to close off the upper decks due to paltry attendance

As an expert on baseball parks,* this story interested me, or at least made me think that I could barf out some words about the topic and call it a brog post.

*someone who has been to every MLB city

To cut to the chase, the Plop (a derivative of the actual nickname “the Trop”) is kind of a shitty place.  It’s an old and dated structure in a city full of old and dated people, the architecture of the place makes very little sense, the ceiling isn’t actually high enough to where it doesn’t occasionally come into play, and it’s overall a really lousy place to watch baseball.

It’s kind of ironic too, because the Tampa Bay Rays are one of those teams that I kind of lean towards favoring, because they’re a franchise that has relied on outsmarting the competition because they certainly can’t compete with the payrolls of everyone else in MLB, and has actually succeeded a lot more than they’ve failed over the last few years, yielding somewhat respectable win-loss records since the magic switch was flipped in 2008 where they decided to stop sucking, and made it all the way to the World Series.

They’re a team that I think is kind of cool in the sense that they’re never really a threat to my lukewarm Braves fandom, and I always have respect for teams that rely on smarts and analysis over just haphazardly signing free agents and hoping for instant results.  And it’s a shame that they play for such a disinterested fanbase, inside of a ballpark that’s amongst the worst in the Majors.

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Oh, Atlanta #877

To quote an internet commenter who was quoting any brand consultant:

the best diversion to consistent mediocrity is new branding and messaging.

That being said, you know what that means!  A new logo was made for something that didn’t need it!  And not only was a new logo created for something that didn’t need it, it also cost $590,000 to “make!”

Man, I am absolutely in the wrong business.  I totally need to find a way to get back onto the agency side that somehow has entire cities in their back pockets, to where they can charge over half a million dollars to rip off the Airwalk shoes logo, and then package it in 75 words of fluff and bullshit that could sell water to the ocean.  Because I’m pretty sure I could plagiarize one thing a year and be completely satisfied pulling in six figures for doing such and then calling it a year.

I mean I don’t even know where to begin with this perfect example of federal waste and in all likelihood crooked Atlanta politicians spoon-feeding their bedroom buddies.  But I think the most succinct place to start is with just the symbol itself:

  • The shapes that form the “star” in the logo are a series of “A’s” – or arrows – that spiral around a central axis, “symbolizing the freedom of movement provided to the region.” 
  • The arrows point toward and away from the center, “creating pulse-like movement.” 
  • The shape is reminiscent of a star, “and stars have provided guidance to travelers for thousands of years.” 

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The epitome of owned

I know that I concluded that Atlanta United winning an MLS Cup “counts” towards the city getting a long awaited championship, but if you ever wanted more proof that MLS doesn’t get any respect, look no further than the fact that the reigning MLS Champions won’t be able to play its CONCACAF Champions League home games, at home; due to a scheduling conflict – with Monster Jam and Supercross.

AKA the Grave Digger white trash redneck monster truck show and a bunch of dirtbikes pretending like they’re Excitebike.

So despite the fact that Atlanta United accomplished the impossible in getting the cursed monkey off the city’s back by winning a professional sport championship, they’re still denied the opportunity to represent the United States to a likely packed home field against Costa Rica’s Herediano fútbol club.

This is what I liked to declare, owned.

It’s really kind of silly too, because anyone who lives in Atlanta has probably seen just how maniacal it gets in the city whenever there’s an international friendly featuring one or two Latin American squads.  Mexico vs. Venezuela easily filled 65,000 at the Georgia Dome, and Honduras vs. Mexico easily matched that. 

If Atlanta United drew 73,000 into the Benz for the MLS Championship game, imagine just how easily it would draw another 73,000 featuring the heroes of the city versus, a Latin American squad?

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