Prior to reading this, I implore my six readers to press play and listen to the theme of when the NBA was truly golden, and basketball was a respectable sport rife with athletes playing against other athletes in the game of basketball, and news was limited to solely basketball-related stories.
This is a topic that’s been on my head for quite some time, but never really chose to run with it, because quite frankly the world is full of way more interesting stories, or things that I’d rather write about, like overturned tractor trailers, or conspiracy theories about MARTA. But then I saw this article about Ray Allen being a bitch because all his former Celtics teammates had a championship team reunion and didn’t invite him, because they are all bitches as well.
This story follows a week that also saw DeMar DeRozan of the Toronto Raptors whining about how his team would have advanced in the playoffs if they had LeBron James; like a sore loser, or, like a bitch.
And speaking of LeBron James, earlier in the season, he had an altercation with a teammate, but instead of going Old Testament on him and kicking his ass in the locker room or throwing him under the bus to the media, instead he, the guy who brought glory back to Cleveland, won numerous championships and has nothing left to prove, assumes blame, takes responsibility for the altercation and apologizes to the jobber teammate, the fans and the organization.
Like a bitch.
There’s no way to sugar coat it, and honestly I don’t know why anyone would want to. The NBA is full of bitches, plain and simple. Basketball takes a backseat every night to the bitchy activities that the bitches in the league bitch over, like passive-aggressive snipes on Twitter, shade being thrown in post-game press conferences, and beat writers selectively quoting player remarks to create the juiciest, most tantalizing drama as possible. All bitch activities, catered to appeal to bitches, all while in between it all, they bounce a ball on hardwood floors and miss free throws left and right.
Back in the day, when NBA stood for the National Basketball Association, if Luc Longley stepped out of line, Michael Jordan wouldn’t just beat the shit out of him in the locker room, within a week his ass would have been shipped off to the Vancouver Grizzlies. Magic Johnson wouldn’t be caught dead saying that the Lakers would’ve beaten the Celtics if they had Larry Bird, no, Magic would basically say that Bird was lucky that his pasty white ass was being carried by Kevin McHale and Robert Parrish, that he was lucky this time, and that he’ll get even later.
And Charles Barkley and Patrick Ewing never have to worry about not being invited to any reunion parties, because neither of them won a championship, which is a story in itself, but also on account of the fact that they played in a league without bitches for them to have steam rolled, and thus became unintentional bitches by virtue of losing all the time.
The fact is, the state of the NBA today is a sad state of affairs that really loves the drama exhibited by the trainloads of sociopathic narcissistic personalities that occupy the league, and basketball is a secondary affair that the players play in between their Twitter feuds and their personal brand curating.
Long gone are the days where players aside from Draymon Green show any iota of toughness, and 90% of the conflicts in the league are all talk and no action on the court. This isn’t to say that there aren’t handfuls of players here and there that aren’t bitches, but if there was ever a precise point in history where the NBA went from a basketball association to a bitches association, it’s probably the day Tim Duncan retired.
